RogerDuke

Jesse is really excited about this race. He has never been one to embrace technology but is making an exception. After Rosco caught Elon Musk in the celebrity speed trap, Jesse and the boys broke him out of jail and in order to return the favor, Elon agreed to fix up Emma's dirt bike and convert it into a technologically superior racing machine that is only programmed to dominate races. It simply cannot lose. Unlucky for Emma though she broke her collar bone jumping a 60 foot wide creek two days earlier so asked Jesse to take her place. Filled with confidence that technology and AI simply cannot fail, Jesse was already daydreaming about that kiss Emma was going to give him in the winners circle.

POSSUM on a gumbush

Maybe his win will bring you luck in the Moonshine 400. There is a lot of pressure on the returning champion.

octopus

Jesse is here sitting on the dirt bike and his only job is to put the kick stand up when the race starts. Everything is going to be done remotely by Elon in his office and by Emma who is looking down from the peak of Iron Mountain. This is going to be an easy win for Team Tisdale. The bike has been programed by the biggest tech genius in the history of the world and it's only command is to win the race at all costs. Emma's role is actually pretty minimal. She is really only going to be there to make minor adjustments and take the remote controls as a back up if something goes wrong.....but that is not likely to happen because technology is superior to humans and nothing can possibly go wrong. The race is in the bag. Jesse can sit back, relax and let the Elon Muskcycle do all the work. High tech is gonna shine in the Moonshine 400. You people who are stupid enough to not believe in technology are gonna learn how superior it is.

the NEW dukes

paper

mary KAYE

You have just sealed your doom Hobie. Even thinking about kissing my woman is a kiss of death for you and your stupid car. I have something special for you. By the time me and Elon are done modifying the dirt bike it's going to be more dangerous than the mean green machine. Emma's honor needs defended and I'm just the man to do it. Enjoy your last place trophy.

Thunder

I don't even know why you folks are even bothering racing. Didn't you see what I wrote? Elon Musk has rigged the dirt bike up with the latest tech. It simply can't be beat. Just hand Jesse the trophy now and cancel the race. It will be a complete waste of time since the winner is already known before it even starts. With Jesse on the dirt bike and Emma at the remote controls at the peak of Iron Mountain and the backing of Elon Musk and the most superior technology known to human beings, I'm declaring Jesse the winner right now. It's over before it starts. You can go home now. Just hand Jesse the trophy first.

George Jones

You should start a new thread titled 2026 Moonshine 400. Let the trash talking begin. I have a lot to say about how I am going to leave you in my dust.

divorce

That's sad.

death (the kiss of death)

Yep And you aren't going to believe what I have planned. You will never guess. Okay, I can't wait. I have to say it. I'll be on Emma's postal dirt bike but she is going to be operating it remotely on top of Iron Mountain where she can see the entire race. Ain't no way anybody can beat me and her when we team up. I have to give you credit Hobie with your buttermilk comment. I thought it would be fun to have a buttermilk in each hand so you inspired me by saying I was racing with one hand. I'm taking this to the next level. You might have noticed I've been delivering the mail in my truck lately. That's because Emma has been at Elon Musk's house these past couple days and they are working on the bike. I have to admit I am a little concerned. She is quite a catch. I hope he doesn't get any ideas and try to steal her from me.

hug

Probably won't be home until midnight.

I can do it. I've gotten pretty good with tech lately. My wife just showed me how to open links. It's not really that hard. You just click on it and all the information pops up. I asked her to show me how to do a screen shot so hopefully in a few weeks I'll get good at doing those too. Is there anything else I need to know?

Sorry but I have an astronomy event to go to in a place called Clarion Pennsylvania. I'll jump a creek on the way down though just to get in the spirit of DOHD. Yeeeehawwww!

Good to hear you have a new phone. I use a really old tablet for HN. Blew up from a swollen battery? Cause any other damage? Were you in the outhouse at the time? I hope you don't need a new outhouse now.

That was some crash! Sounds like nobody got hurt very bad. Looked like a demolition derby.

No ketchup or mustard for me. I eat corn dogs the way Boss eats liver....raw. They taste so good I don't want to mask the deliciousness with anything.

If you two need any technical advice just let me know.