This is mean but funny. When Boss was talking about the old days to Lucinda Meadows, he snapped at Cletus and said "You weren't around in the old days.....and I ain't too pleased to have you around in the new days either."

Here's a good one from "Jude Emery"

Boss to Sheriff Grady Byrd "You couldn't catch a catfish in a coffee cup!!"

If I caught a Catfish in a cup I keep it.

I can't remember what episode, but he says(I think he was talking to Rosco) "Enos couldn't find a pumpkin on Halloween!"

LOL this one is from the Rustlers, I believe...

Rosco: Boss whats a five letter word for Dunce?

Boss: R.O.S.C.O

Rosco: Jit! It fits!

Poor Rosco...

This isn't a Boss quote. It's a Waylon quote about Boss but it seemed better to put it here instead of in the Waylon quotes thread.

It's from "Brotherly Love".

"Now as crooked as old Boss is, he don't cotton to violence. He figures if ya gotta be violent to be crooked, you're trash."

(Early in the series Boss mentioned that he doesn't like violence and he stuck with that policy the whole series. But on the Hazzard Soundtrack part of the lyrics in the song he sang was "Try anything in my neck of the woods and you'll bleed right through the nose.") I think we all agree that it's good that the writers of the show ignored that song.

from "Targets: Daisy and Lulu"

When Boss thought that Lulu had spent a lot of money on a diamond necklace, he said,

"How dare you spend my hardly earned money....I mean hard earned money"

I like this one from "The Fugitive"

After Rosco had been looking for the Dukes awhile he announced to Boss "They weren't anywhere I looked"

Boss then responded "Well, have you tried anyplace you haven't looked?"

I like this one from "The Fugitive"

After Rosco had been looking for the Dukes awhile he announced to Boss "They weren't anywhere I looked"

Boss then responded "Well, have you tried anyplace you haven't looked?"

This is from "Mrs. Rosco P. Coltrane"

"Shift Your Brains Out of Neutral."

That's a good one Julie.

Most of the time my brain's going in reverse so neutral doesn't sound so bad!!

LOL Roger I know the feeling.

Another quote from "Mrs. Rosco P. Coltrane" (I am not a hundred percent sure it was Boss who said it, but I think it was him.)

To Rosco or Cletus:

"You wouldn't find the floor if you fell out of bed"

Isn't that quote from The Great Santa Clause Chase?

I guess it could be...I seen both episodes in the same day.

When Boss assigned Rosco a job he had to do at midnight, Rosco said that he and Flash went nighty night at 9:00.

Boss responded. "Well then set your clock three hours ahead. That way you won't lose any sleep."

Lol that's a great quote!

I'd liked it too texasdaisy. In case you're wondering, it was from "The Haunting of J.D. Hogg"

Was watchin the episode 'Nothin But the Truth"'...I think that was the title....anyways Boss was injected with truth serum and Rosco had said something about his lil fat buddy, and he didnt mean fat, and Boss said that he was and then said he overate and then Boss said,

"I'll eat anything that doesn't bite me first." I love that line...just the way he said it was so funny...least to me...I couldn't stop laughin...

LOL Redneck Girl...I haven't seen t hat episode in a long time, but now that you said that, I think I remember him saying that! Poor ol' Boss couldn't lie to save his own life if need be in that episode.

That's one of the many things I love about Rosco and Boss.

They could say something that wouldn't be funny if anybody else said it but when they say it, it's hilarious. Of course, a lot of that is just plain old acting talent and those two guys were overflowing with it.

You can see this reply coming a mile off, but I still like it. In 'Go West, Young Dukes', Rufus was apologizing to Thaddeus for finding the discarded playing card on the floor:

Rufus: Well, I'm sorry Mr. Hogg, but I didn't know you weren't playing with a full hand.

Thaddeus: That's because you ain't playing with a full deck.

i like this quote from the episode enos strate to the top

Jefferson Davis 'Boss' Hogg: I've already found someone whose willing to kick back 50% of his pay!

Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane: Who? Who could be that stupid?

Jefferson Davis 'Boss' Hogg: My third cousin, twice removed, Cletus Hogg!

Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane: Uh, Cletus, C-Cletus Hogg?

Jefferson Davis 'Boss' Hogg: Yeah, Cousin Cletus Hogg!

Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane: Oh, he is stupid! I mean, I mean even the dipsticks call him a dipstick!

Jefferson Davis 'Boss' Hogg: Well then he'll fit in perfect with you, won't he?

From "The Ghost of General Lee":

Boss Hogg: Rosco, I should've known you'd be goldbrickin' while I'm out chasin' a driverless car all the way to tarnation and back!

Rosco: You seen it?! You seen it, too?! The ghost of General Lee?! Come back.

Boss Hogg: Course I seen it. And that car was no ghost. Them Duke boys may be dead, but the car ain't, because cars don't die.

Rosco: Batteries do, Boss. Uh, why not cars?

This one gets me every time!

From 'The Runaway', Rosco and Enos have just collided allowing the Dukes and Suzy to get away. Boss, in Rosco's car, says:

"I got me a sheriff who can't find nothing and a deputy who can't even find that!".

From Jude Emery

"Grady Byrd, you couldn't catch a catfish in a coffee cup"

Going back through this thread I can't believe I never put in my favorite Boss quote.

From "New Deputy in Town" after giving his word to her about not saying anything about the prisoner that was coming for a stop over (I haven't watched the episode for awhile so I can't remember names), after she leaves the booking room he says...

"And my word ain't worth diddly doo!"

ROFL

On 3/29/2008 at 7:43 PM, LoriDavenport said:

LOL this one is from the Rustlers, I believe...

Rosco: Boss whats a five letter word for Dunce?

Boss: R.O.S.C.O

Rosco: Jit! It fits!

Poor Rosco...

Cousin Lori Davenport... That's actually Days of Shine and Roses.