Brian Coltrane

Nice job on the flag avatar, MaryAnne. That would come in handy IF I was going to be late turning in my story. Which I'm not. Far as I can tell at this point, anyway! So, I'm carrying on with my taunts. Here's another picture that isn't quite spooky but it's a little scary nonetheless. I'm sure Alex likes this concept, but.....

Speak for yerself! My story is comin' along just fine. So far. But, I've been thinkin' of you and your plight, so I took the liberty of updating your avatar with the ol' spookify setting. You might as well get used to it...

Quick reply heah.... Julie, I'm not a big Stephen King fan, but I have read Christine, and I saw the movie years ago. Lotsa fun. Out of all his books, my favorite is "The Eyes of the Dragon." It's a great time-period drama, and if you're into medieval themes you'll dig it. MaryAnne, why is it we don't have our stories done, but we can fritter away time making creepy photoshop effects? In the process, I notice you've made the After-Hazzard look a mite darker. You sinister fiend! I think you're enjoying yourself just a little too much with this. We'll find out just how far you take things by the 28th. I don't know whether to look forward to the story, or...freak out now and save myself some time. Gah!

Daney, are you playing to lose? Benefits to being a ghost....I can't really think of any! Personally I plan to put off that experience for as long as possible. Except for MaryAnne's writing, which sounds like it's gettin' sinister. I shoulda known it would come to this some day. After years of petty bickering, pranks, duels, and squabbling over day-old baked goods left at the office.....now we're officially authoring each other's demise. And if the photoshop taunts are any indicator, MaryAnne's parting with the earth looks very dramatic and creepy. Here it is again, just to annoy her. Ghost Patrol! Heh heh. To be fair, I applied the same photoshop trick to the photo she had for me, to see how it would look. It's creepy, but in a peaceful sorta way. Respectively. I'd better get back to writing. 13 days left.......bwaahahahaha!!

We've got 3 stories in, and plenty of time for the rest of ya'll to finish yours. Looks like plenty of spookifyin' stories are in the works! I can't resist giving MaryAnne a peek into the abyss...

Thanks for the b-day wishes, ya'll! I did read them this last weekend, sorry I'm late in posting acknowledgement. (You know how it is when ya get up there in age.... takes longer to get sober.) Yep, this is the oldest I've ever been! Seein' as how I've got the benefit of wisdom n' experience and a deep inner psychosis, I thought I'd share a few pearls of birthday wisdom with you. 1) Bailey's Irish Cream and a cold root beer, mixed together, make a great party drink. Cheers! 2) There's worse things than getting older. Like...not getting older. Never turn down a birthday. 3) Have cake. Even if you have to cram a candle on top of a Twinkie, have a birthday cake. Rituals have their place. 4) It's not the presents that count... it's the presence, of those you have around you, that are the greatest gifts. 5) Bailey's Irish Cream and root beer.... oh yeah, we covered that one. Let's cover it again. *hic!* Thank you all, Brian

Just a reminder, we're heading into October and the grains are running through the hourglass. Anybody else besides Mufn have their story done yet? Or almost done? Mine's going ok, except it's supposta be a ghost story, and the protagonist ( antagonist? heh heh ) in the story seems to be a little hesitant on charging ahead into oblivion. Which means I'm missing some detail or another in the scene, so I'm taking my time with it. Okay, maybe I'm stalling. Maybe I can't do it. Maybe I can't write that. GAAAAH!!

Either there wasn't anything quote-able, or Daney is working on my kind of deadline. Which is to say, what deadline? Heh!

A lot of folks help keep an eye on this place, and sometimes we're not recognizing them like we should. Tonight I'm givin' a big ol' HazzardNet Hollar to Val Strate, for reporting a spammer in our Forums. Val, thank ya for finding the problem and going the extra step of notifying us about it. Sal-ute ! It's good citizens like you who help keep HazzardNet safe and enjoyable for all.

Hey, this ghost post gig is gettin' a pretty good turnout. It's always fun to see lotsa participants in a challenge. This time, the community "spirit" is spook-tacular. It's boo-tiful. Got just about 34 days here to nail the lid on your....story, so I hope everybody's off to a great start!

Thanks Daney. Is there a good quote by Ben in the book, something that kind of speaks to the tone of the whole works? Another interesting read out there is by Jerry Rushing. It's his life's story of moonshining and what life was like when he was involved with it. Also speaks to how his life turned around. This keeps up, I reckon we'll have a Hazzard County book club going!

Why, of course. Rosco is a fairly easy character to imitate, and John Schneider always got a kick out of impersonating him on a few Dukes episodes. The best Rosco "imitation" is by Jimmie Best himself, in the episode "Too Many Roscos." It's the ol' evil twin plot, and the sight of the impersonating Rosco trying to sound like the real Rosco, and being off just a hair, is pretty dang funny.

We have to declare this formally? I've heard the expression "signing your life away" but .... *takes a good long look at the terms and conditions* What sick, twisted mind came up with this evil scheme? Still, I can't let ya'll face the madness alone. Formal declaration, eh? Awright... I, Brian Coltrane, hereby declare that I will attempt to complete a freakin' Halloween story and have it submitted by midnight, October 28th, 2008. If I fail to complete a story by the...deadline, I understand that I will be subject to the terms and conditions of the Ghost Post challenge. Namely, that I'll find myself tossed into the abyss - probably located somewhere in our archive section - and become a ghost, which shouldn't be an imposition considering most of my efforts here are fairly invisible anyway.

If that was freedom, I'd hate to see the alternative. Tho' I suppose that was the point. I'll have another homepage update....eh, maybe Friday night or Saturday. There's a couple of Dukes thangs goin' on out there. One thing I'm way behind on that I meant to do over the summer, is buy and read Ben's book. Anybody read it yet? If somebody's got a book report, lemme know.

I think Supernatural might have "jumped the shark" tonight. It was a cool episode, but talk about getting Dean in over his head. Like way over. At the end of the last season, Dean dies and goes to hell. (this is a fairly standard Winchester family tradition by this point.) In tonight's season opener....pow! He's outta there in the first few minutes of the program, alive and whole, and we get to scratch our heads for the next 40 minutes wondering how that neat trick was accomplished. When it's explained, it's so over the top, that you have to wonder how this latest entrant to the war on free-range demons is going to mix with the show's usual tone. Or how Dean is going to get along with the particular chaperone he's picked up. Let's just say there's "touched by an angel" and then there's "cast-iron fry pan over the head by an angel."

Ha ha ha. Hey, I was on hiatus ( Ok, I was AWOL) for a few months, and I still have highest number of posts. So what's it take to actually be famous around here? Maybe I don't want an answer to that, seeing some of our current topics. Nevahmind!

The only foolproof way to be sure that an autograph is authentic, is to be there watching when it's being signed. Anything else, you take your chances. I'm surprised to hear that Michael S. is peddling Duke stuff again. Allegedly he'd sold or given most of his collection to Aneesh when he turned over the "official" *cough* Dukes of Hazzard fan club over to him. In fact, the first DukesFest that was performed by the club, was little more than Michael's Rummage Sale of Dukes Crap. Sure, there were a handful of General Lee's there, and they did get Sonny, and Don Pedro, and Jerry Rushing, and Ben there. I'll give them that. All that aside, it was a massive free-for-all, and one of the more shining examples of how a fan's interest in a nostaligic tv show can be gleefully exploited for profit. Don't get me started. Brian

Yes, you got me to do somethin'. Kindly release my car from the impound yard. I'd also appreciate getting this handcuff off, because dragging around the metal file cabinet drawer that's attached to it is kinda cumbersome. Not to mention noisy. Ok, so I fell asleep on the job a few times, no reason why we can't start over fresh, is there? And please call off your dog. Thank ya in advance. Have I mentioned how it's great to be back? Really! It is. Glad to be here! ( because it beats the alternatives) Brian

I don't know when this video came out, I watching a video countdown on GAC, and happened to see Jewel's new video. Yep, she's gone country. (who ain't, lately? ) At first I was like, ok, another chick wearing boots and getting out of a hot rod. Seen this before. 'Cept Jewel was getting out of a 78 Trans Am. Ok, I'm watching. She goes into a bar, makes eyes at some dude. Song is pretty tame. But then she leaves the bar and does a smoking peel-out, and the dude jumps into his 1969 Charger to chase her. Here we go, I'm not changing the channel now... The love chase turns into a game of chicken, with the Charger and the Trans Am heading right for each other, head-on. All the while, Jewel is singing her wistful little song and looking unconcerned. And THEN... Well, I can't ruin it for ya. Try catching it for yourself. The Charger isn't orange, but this thing had Dukes of Hazzard influence written all over it. And Jewel can sing a helluva lot better than Jessica Simpson.

I think moving DukesFest out of Nashville was a huge tactical error. Nashville backed that gig 100%, and to Atlanta it was just one more little shindig, hardly worth a mention. Also in considering location - I'm willing to bet a good number of of traveling Dukes fans come from areas in the upper midwest and northeast of the country. There's loyal Dukes fans from all over the place, don't get me wrong, but many of the folks who had found TN or even VA a feasible road trip, couldn't swing to GA and back on a weekend. I already bashed the promotional efforts months ago, but it's worth mentioning again. I'll also reiterate that this years's DukesFest had the challenge of the economy to cope with, plus there was no active airing of DOH on tv, no CNN backing. All that said....those challenges were obvious, going into this thing, but I didn't see the DF promoters offering much against it. Instead, we saw announcements about Adam West. Under the collective circumstances, the fact that this year's DukesFest had the turnout it did, is a tribute to the die-hards who made the trip and made the economic sacrifices to be there. To the GL owners and fans and volunteers who made the gig, we salute ya.

Beautiful work on the flag and lettering. This car already looks better than some of the General Lee's I've seen out there. Thank you for sharing the pictures.

Can't beat a small town for excitment, can ya! Awright, I can't stand to see a grown deputy unhappy. I'll write an article tonight. Honestly. We'll update the home page tomorrow night and see if anybody notices. How's that?

Oh, since you're asking so nicely, I'll do some work. *sorts paper clips, separating the small ones from the big ones, whistling tunelessly*

MaryAnne, you carry a gun, and that's pretty damn dangerous. Hell, when you sit behind the control panel of HazzardNet, that's dangerous. Besides, you can get a good cattle prod at Farm & Fleet for about twenty bucks.

Taser? You haven't altogether mastered the tv remote control. I ain't sure carryin' around 50,000 volts on your hip is a good idea.