Brian Coltrane

Hoss, all I can say is "WOW" followed by "Thank You!" Great information and the most detailed visual analysis I've seen of episodes anywhere. You have a keen eye.

Thank you. Don't worry about a post making sense. The whole website doesn't make sense. We like it that way.

Just wanna chime in here... Roger, good luck on the book project, and go for it. Same for you, Garrett. Never give up. If you want to do something...usually it's because you know you can. You may not know how, exactly, but admitting that you want to do it and then taking steps in that direction will help make it happen. Speaking from experience - dreams don't go away easily, and thank goodness for that. They'll keep you going. Embrace your muse.

The plush cars are cute. What kid wouldn't want one of those? Heck, I want one of those! Dragon is cool too. Plush, the Magic Dragon, lived by the...General Lee

Holy cow, you won? You are now officially famous in HazzardNet circles. Congrats! Please share a picture when you get it!

Hoss, that's awesome! You continue to blow our doors off with your talent. ldhenson, great idea there too! I'm wondering if I could print these out and do something similar with a wall display, with a shelf and one of my General Lee die-cast cars. If I did it to scale it would look pretty cool, like the General being parked in town. Or instead of parked, show the General Lee on two wheels. Anyway it'd be fun!

Since you're wearing it. G'wan now! Put on a brave face, carry a big stick, n' all that. *giving cousin a friendly, encouraging push towards the doors*

*blinks* Oh, no ya don't. I did my part already, I'm pretty sure I caused the riot. *goes and peeks through the blinds* B'sides, you're the one with the shiny silver badge. People in Hazzard County respect that sorta thang. Right?

No problem! I'm sure the crowd wasn't sent to riot school either. They're amatuers, so your own inexperience won't show. Now git out there and hose 'em down or somethin', eh?

Evidently she's in no hurry to get out. That means...mah little scheme has been successful. MUAHAHAAAA!! If she's not payin' attention heah, now's my chance to "update" a few thangs.

This explains why the show never took the chance on changing anybody's clothes.

"Gimmie that..." *grabs the ticket and takes a look* "A parkin' ticket?" *glancing up from the ticket, to the serious, drawn face of the weary Atlanta officer* "You mean, we stole yer car, I sideswiped you on the road, and I took potshots in yer vicinity, over a parking ticket?!" *as the magnitude of the colossal misunderstanding sinks in, one black-clad Coltrane begins to consider a one-way trip out of the country* "I thought...I mean, you came into this town like hell on wheels. I figured the worst. I thought I was safe so long as I stayed outta Atlanta, so when you showed up, I thought..." *pausing* "I think ah'm in big trouble now, if I wasn't before. Tell me the truth, man, was this all some kinda...test?"

*watches the cot-covering, dejected captive and nods to self* Ain't surprised you ain't feelin' good. I gotcha caught in my scheme, and it's one of my better devious plots. You outta be flattered. *hears the noise outside growing louder. Steps over to the window and peers through the blinds, seeing a large crowd with some pitchforks being waved around* Huh. Either the Farm Bureau is on a rampage, or those folks are riled up about somethin'. Whatevah s' all about, MaryAnne needs to do some crowd control.

*looks around for the camera* Oh, come on. Is this why our paychecks are so small, 'cause you went high-tech on us and installed all this junk? You're paying a security company to watch a jail? What, don't you trust us? *finds a camera, and thumbs nose at it* And it can't be called kidnappin', 'cause I'm gonna drum up charges....uh, I'm gonna levy charges to make your stay heah nice and o-fficial. How about embezzlin' county funds? I don't recall us approvin' no security system. Who knows where else you been squanderin' money? Just think of the headlines on the front page! *with this said, eyes Meadowmufn through the bars, seeing if this last threat proves effective*

*looking at the shaken officer, trying to make sense of the incomplete explanation* "Wait...if you didn't come heah for revenge, and you weren't lookin' for a personal kind of justice...what, exactly, were you lookin' for?"

HA! I can forge a notary public's signature just as easy as I can forge your signature! I'll "borrow" the notary stamper, and nobody will evah know the difference! *adding an evil laugh, just for the practice* MUAHAHAHA!!

*showing a thin, wicked smile* Anybody who lets you out, will find themselves takin' yer place. Meantime, I gotta thank you for the excellent idea you just gave me. *looks at the deed* S' true, you sign our paychecks. I've seen your signature enuff to know exactly what it looks like. Which means, I ain't gonna need you to sign this deed after all...since I can do it for you, and imitate yer signature well enuff that nobody at the recordin' office will know the difference. *clicks a pen* Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go practice mah penmanship. KHEEHAHAHAHA!!

*the shotgun is gripped tighter, the trigger finger itching on the unspent round.* "Hell, I'd love to heah an apology. And I'd be flat-out amused if you'd plead for your life. But you know that neither one would make a damn bit of difference if my mind was made up." *the shotgun stays leveled for another few seconds, and the dark eyes behind it seem to narrow. Suddenly, the shotgun is swung to the side, the barrels pointed away from Jack just before the trigger is pulled. The resounding, deafening blast of the gun echoes sharply in the quiet country air...but nothing has been harmed except for a tree. The chunks of bark and splinters of wood take a few more seconds to land, as the barrel of the shotgun smokes thinly.* "Yeah, my mind was made up. I ain't a killer, Jack. I just wanted to show you that I could fight like hell. Ya see, for all I knew, you had second thoughts about what went down in Atlanta, and you came heah to get a different endin'." *with this, tosses the spent shotgun away*

Oh, hush! Those were isolated e-vents. *looks back to Mufn, deed in hand* Now then. I encourage ya to sign this without further ado. Seein' as how, if I mysteriously "disappear", you won't be gettin' outta heah anytime soon.

sugar

..hahaha....uh....yeah. Well ya see, that's why I need you to sign this deed and transfer that power over to me. To prevent any unfortunate misunderstandings that could otherwise im-pede the performance of my duties around heah. *waves the deed* B'sides, it ain't like I'd evah abuse the power. *not counting years of altered posts, mysterious chatroom incidents, and accidently zapping Alex so badly once that it took two weeks and a system reinstall to bring him back*

cupcakes

stars

Oh, I got somethin' little in mind, for bail. Somethin' I'm sure we can all live with.... *pulling out a folded document from inner jacket pocket* All MeadowMufn needs to do, is sign this Deed that transfers ownership of all county properties n' operations to me. *can't resist throwing in an evil laugh* MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Welcome to HazzardNet!