pendragon1980 Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 Fairly pointness topic but that never stopped me before. My cat, Baby Girl, was on antibiotics a few weeks ago for a case of the kitty flu. I got around to throwing the package away today...and read this on the container of feline specific antibiotics..."Do not drive or operate heavy machinary. Avoid all alchol products" I guess its a good thing I stopped BG's cruising and boozing while she was sick. Pendragon Skipper Duke 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chet Duke Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 *Rolls on floor laughing.* Thats real great, ya made my day. Speaking of things like that, Im part of a Wild West Reenactment group called "Shadows of the Old West". A majority of the actors, including myself use blank guns, the same guns that proffessionals use in those fantastic western movies. One of my guns is a .22 Caliber Colt. To order blank amunition for this gun is outragiously priced. I asked one of my fellow actors, an older man who helped me get into this group suggested that like the others I use the .22 shells you put in a nail gun to fire nails into concrete. So I went to my local hardware store and purchased a box. Shot up a 100 rounds in one weekend, so I purchased more. Then one evening after cleaning my guns I happend to read the back of the box that the shells came in. It specifically notes that they should not be used in a blank firing gun. Yet my friends have used them for years! Hmmm...well 350 rounds later... I dont think theres much harm in them. *laughs.*~Chet Duke Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Coltrane Posted November 9, 2006 Report Share Posted November 9, 2006 Chet, it doesn't surprise me to hear that you fire a lot of blanks. Bahahaha.On another topic....How can ya tell when sour cream goes bad? I've got a baked potato ridin' on this one. Brian Skipper Duke 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pendragon1980 Posted November 9, 2006 Author Report Share Posted November 9, 2006 Can't help you there, Brian. I didn't realize sour cream goes bad, it always tastes rancid to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Coltrane Posted November 9, 2006 Report Share Posted November 9, 2006 Well, it's sour cream, so I suppose the robust flavor goes with it. Hence my culinary quandry. Like, how can you tell when blue cheese is moldy?Brian Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bo_Duke_girl Posted November 19, 2006 Report Share Posted November 19, 2006 Fairly pointness topic but that never stopped me before. My cat, Baby Girl, was on antibiotics a few weeks ago for a case of the kitty flu. I got around to throwing the package away today...and read this on the container of feline specific antibiotics..."Do not drive or operate heavy machinary. Avoid all alchol products" I guess its a good thing I stopped BG's cruising and boozing while she was sick. PendragonHahaha I had a video game and I read on the info pamphlet that they give and it said this"May require the skill/ability to read" DUH! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelly Davenport Posted November 21, 2006 Report Share Posted November 21, 2006 Got a few - and these are ones I actually HAVE.On the package of Betty Crocker Fruit Roll-ups:Peel fruit from cellophane before eating.But it tastes so much better with it on.Peter Pan Peanut ButterProduct contains peanuts.No s***, Sherlock. Guess what else contains peanuts. PEANUTS!On the instruction sheet of a Conair Pro Style 1600 hair dryer:WARNING: Do not use in shower. Never use while sleeping.And never blow dry your hair while you’re sleeping in the shower.Makes me wonder who survives longer: the idiots who caused these warnings to be in place ... or the people who decided these things SHOULD be warnings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bo_Duke_girl Posted November 22, 2006 Report Share Posted November 22, 2006 I'm THE reason why they put the no one under age 3 things on toy packages Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Betsyraeduke Posted November 26, 2006 Report Share Posted November 26, 2006 Got a few - and these are ones I actually HAVE.On the package of Betty Crocker Fruit Roll-ups:Peel fruit from cellophane before eating.But it tastes so much better with it on.Peter Pan Peanut ButterProduct contains peanuts.No s***, Sherlock. Guess what else contains peanuts. PEANUTS!On the instruction sheet of a Conair Pro Style 1600 hair dryer:WARNING: Do not use in shower. Never use while sleeping.And never blow dry your hair while you’re sleeping in the shower.Makes me wonder who survives longer: the idiots who caused these warnings to be in place ... or the people who decided these things SHOULD be warnings. In addition to the blow dryer warning, I've also had curling irons which come with the warning; "Do not use while sleeping". I have to wonder how many people style their hair while they are asleep. LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelly Davenport Posted November 26, 2006 Report Share Posted November 26, 2006 Fairly pointness topic but that never stopped me before. My cat, Baby Girl, was on antibiotics a few weeks ago for a case of the kitty flu. I got around to throwing the package away today...and read this on the container of feline specific antibiotics..."Do not drive or operate heavy machinary. Avoid all alchol products" I guess its a good thing I stopped BG's cruising and boozing while she was sick. PendragonWell, on that note, I talked to my sister - who is a veterinarian - and she said a lot of medicines that are given to our pets double as human meds. I don't know if that makes me feel any better, though .... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bo_Duke_girl Posted November 27, 2006 Report Share Posted November 27, 2006 Funny, I take sleeping pills to help me fall asleep at night and I had read this post and thought that there would be something stupid on the side of the pill bottle. There was. It said"May cause dizzyness or drowsiness" Yeah... It's a sleeping pill it's suppose to do thatIt also said "May impair your ability to drive" No kidding. I do NOT want to drive to dreamland Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enos Fan Posted January 20, 2007 Report Share Posted January 20, 2007 My favorite was the Superman costume for children.The wearing of this costume does not insure that your child can fly! I won't even go there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bo_Duke_girl Posted January 22, 2007 Report Share Posted January 22, 2007 Hahaha they should do it for all flying characters. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bo_Duke_girl Posted February 25, 2007 Report Share Posted February 25, 2007 My favorite was the Superman costume for children.The wearing of this costume does not insure that your child can fly! I won't even go there. Seriously, you wonder who pays these people to put that kind of crap on the costume Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lancashire_Lost_Sheep Posted February 25, 2007 Report Share Posted February 25, 2007 We got a cheap mini cordless mouse to use with the work laptop and the Chinese pidgin English instructions it came with were great."Always use mouse with provided white table".I looked in every corner of the little box the mouse came in and just couldn't find the white table anywhere! Instead I have to take a big risk everytime I use the mouse on an ordinary table. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enos Fan Posted February 25, 2007 Report Share Posted February 25, 2007 Seriously, you wonder who pays these people to put that kind of crap on the costumeActually, it isn't that that makes me sad, it's that fact that some people are really quick about filing law suits when they buy products that aren't marked to the hilt with disclaimers. I could get on a soapbox about that nonsense, but I'd rather not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i1976 Posted February 25, 2007 Report Share Posted February 25, 2007 Got a few - and these are ones I actually HAVE.On the package of Betty Crocker Fruit Roll-ups:Peel fruit from cellophane before eating.But it tastes so much better with it on.Peter Pan Peanut ButterProduct contains peanuts.No s***, Sherlock. Guess what else contains peanuts. PEANUTS!On the instruction sheet of a Conair Pro Style 1600 hair dryer:WARNING: Do not use in shower. Never use while sleeping.And never blow dry your hair while you’re sleeping in the shower.Makes me wonder who survives longer: the idiots who caused these warnings to be in place ... or the people who decided these things SHOULD be warnings. Peter Pan Peanut ButterProduct contains peanuts. WARNING!!!! I'm worried about it.Peanuts Package on American Airlines:Instructions: Open the package. Eat peanuts Aaaaah. Now I can keep quiet. Really, these warnings are very useful. But it is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lukas_KD Posted February 27, 2007 Report Share Posted February 27, 2007 Yes, it is sad how sue-happy this entire nation's becoming. Heck, the world. It's suddenly someone's else's fault if you do something stupid that you shoulda have the sense to know not to do. Oh for the good ol' days... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Val Strate Posted February 27, 2007 Report Share Posted February 27, 2007 I was reading the label to some smoothie mix one time and it said on the label to clear themselves of any lawsuits and I quote exact words."Now do we have to tell you not to put this package in the microwave"Obliviously ya do need to tell'em because you wouldn't say that if you didn't need to.Of course who puts smoothie mix in the microwave? Smoothies are drinks that are normally served COLD! Yeah, let's put it in the microwave! That will make it colder! Good idear! I swear some of these people that need these warnings should run for the Darwin awards.Val Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Coltrane Posted February 28, 2007 Report Share Posted February 28, 2007 I knew the IQ of humanity hit a new low, when I saw directions printed on a box of matches. Ok, if you need directions on how to strike a match, you shouldn't be handling matches. Let alone fireworks or gas grills or whatever else you're using the matches for. Warning labels and the safety caps on products have become insane. I can't open a friggin' bottle of ketchup without having to get a pliers to remove the safety seal under the cap. Here's what the ketchup bottle needs: Warning: Contains tomatoes AND an impenetrable safety seal to make sure you won't be at risk for using our product. For display use only. Keep out of the reach of children, pets, and adults. Concentrating and inhaling contents could induce suffocation. Void where prohibited. Contents under pressure. Do not point at eye. Flammable. Do not mix with other household condiments as chemcial reactions may occur. Use only in well-ventilated areas. If irritation or swelling persists see your doctor. Brian Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enos Fan Posted March 1, 2007 Report Share Posted March 1, 2007 Good thing I use a plastic squeeze bottle of ketchup. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
countrygirl1986 Posted May 5, 2007 Report Share Posted May 5, 2007 Liquid foundation: for external use only (and who is gonna try to wear makeup on the inside of the body??)Mint Julep Masque: avoid contact with eyes, if contact occures.... for external use only. keep out of reach of children. (and who is going to try to use a mud masque on their eyes or give their expensive facial products to their children? and who is gonna think to consume a mud masque?)Aloe vera gel w/ lidocane:external use only;avoid contact with eyes, ask doctor if condition worsens or if symptoms persist for more than seven days, if symptoms clear up and come back. children under two years of age ask a doctor. Directions: apply to affected area (duhhhh. how the heck do you burn the eyes outside a flash burn from welding?)Lotion: external use only, directions: apply as needed..dish soap: do not consume (now who is dumb enough to do that? if you've ever accidentally left even a little bit in your glass you know it's nasty as heck!)TV dinner: Remove from box before microwavingBurn cream: Helps sooth pain from sunburn, minor burns...Coffee containers: Caution, product hotSome food labels for after cooking: Caution, product will be hot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaneyDuke Posted August 19, 2007 Report Share Posted August 19, 2007 Frozen Pizza box instructions: Do not eat frozen pizza Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DukesForever1980 Posted April 24, 2009 Report Share Posted April 24, 2009 Preparation H says on the tube "do not take this orally" Well, unless you'd been under a rock fer all ya life everybody knows ya don't eat it. Whoever did musta had indigestion to the extreme. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HossC Posted July 17, 2010 Report Share Posted July 17, 2010 Way back in the days of 486s and early Pentiums I used to build PCs part time. I still remember a Soyo motherboard manual that had been translated into "English". In the days before USBs and Plug n Pray (sic) computers everything was set up with little jumpers. In the manual section for setting the Com ports it contained the line "??? I do not understand this bit ???". If the guy writing the manual doesn't get it, what chance did I have?@i1976 When I studied programming we were always told "you can make software foolproof, but not damn-foolproof".@countrygirl1986 I guess the coffee container warnings came after McDonald's lost $640,000 in a famous 1994 lawsuit.@DukesForever1980 I tried taking Preparation H orally and it was useless - for all the good it did, I may as well as stuck it up my a... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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