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Favorite Dukes of Hazzard Quotes


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Boss Hogg:"Rosco!" Rosco:"What?" Boss Hogg:"Jack ass! Why didn't you arrest 'em?

 

Remember " Money To Burn"? Rosco was inside the empty casket stacking bills ( or Moonshine?) and Boss called him a Jackass and  he said ....keeping his face hidden in the casket...." That's sheriff Jackass!" Anybody remember that one?

Edited by Hobie Hartkins
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4 hours ago, Hobie Hartkins said:

Boss Hogg:"Rosco!" Rosco:"What?" Boss Hogg:"Jack ass! Why didn't you arrest 'em?

 

Remember " Money To Burn"? Rosco was inside the empty casket stacking bills ( or Moonshine?) and Boss called him a Jackass and  he said ....keeping his face hidden in the casket...." That's sheriff Jackass!" Anybody remember that one?

Cousin Hobie Hartkins... Rosco:"How high you want me to stack these bills?" Boss Hogg:"How high!? Well, how high are those gallon jugs we used to run shine in?" Rosco:(Gesturing how high with hands held apart over each other.)"Oh. About this high!" Boss Hogg:"Then, that's how high we can go under the false bottom, jackass!" Rosco:(In caaket stacking money.)"That's Sheriff jackass!"

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(Season 4 Double Dukes) Boss Hogg sits on Flash and throws his back out.

Rosco:"Is there anything I can do Boss?" Boss:"You already did it! On account of, it's all your fault knucklehead!" Rosco:"But I wasn't anywhere near you!" Boss:"No! But that mangy mutt of yours parked her carcass in my office chair!"

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13 hours ago, Hobie Hartkins said:

This is one you may not get unless you think about it. I know I didn't think about it for a LONG time! LOL!

 

( Rosco to Enos)   " How many times, have I told you, that no one goes into that office but Boss, the dog or me, when I'm not here?"

 

LOL!! I think that one's funny! :)  

Season 3 Mrs. Rosco P. Coltrane :)

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13 hours ago, Hobie Hartkins said:

This is one you may not get unless you think about it. I know I didn't think about it for a LONG time! LOL!

 

( Rosco to Enos)   " How many times, have I told you, that no one goes into that office but Boss, the dog or me, when I'm not here?"

 

LOL!! I think that one's funny! :)  

Cousin Hobie... Actually it's a Cletus episode. ;)

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(Season 2 Dukes Meet Cale Yarborough)

At Roadblock number 3

Luke Duke:"Now comes the good part."

Rosco:"Here they come!!" Boss Hogg:"Rosco, shoot if you have to! Aim fer their tires! Just stop 'em!" Bo Duke:"We got the light!" Cale Yarborough:"Then hang on!" General Lee jumps Boss Hogg's Cadillac, Rosco's patrol car, and the Jethro Bros car. Boss Hogg:"Aaaah!!" Bo Duke:"Yeah-hoo!" Hits Dixie horn. Lands. Bo, Luke, Cale laugh.

 

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(Season 2 Ghost of the General Lee)

Rosco:"No! Oh Enos I'm glad to see you." Enos:"They were out of Catfish Sheriff." Rosco:"Never mind the Catfish Enos. I thought you were one of them." Enos:"Them?" Rosco:"Yeah! Bo and Luke Duke." Enos:"Now Sheriff, you know it ain't polite to make fun of Bo and Luke after they passed." Rosco:"I ain't. I ain't. I want you to see somethin' you ain't never seen. Now, don't be frightened. Just move out there. What do you call that right in there?" Enos:"That's a ghost Sheriff." Rosco:"No it ain't. There ain't no such thing as ghosts." Enos:"Well it'll do til one comes along."

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Posted (edited)

(Season 2 Dukes Meet Cale Yarborough)

Luke Duke:(Into The Jethro Bros listening bug.)"Boss. This here's Luke Duke. You got yer ears on? Now, me and Bo got a personal message for ya. Just for your ears only, so listen up you here?" Boss Hogg:(Into listening bug controller.)"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm listenin'!" (Dixie horn blasts in his ears.)

Edited by Skipper Duke
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(Season 2 People's Choice)

Uncle Jesse:"Now when I made the deal with the U. S. A. Federal Government that you two got probation you two were to report to your Hazzard County probation officer once a month. Now isn't that right!?" Bo Duke:"Yes sir we did." Uncle Jesse:"Well, then why didn't you?"
Bo Duke:" Well, because they never told us who the  dang guy was!
Uncle Jesse:"Watch yer language."
Bo Duke:"Yes sir!" Daisy Duke:"I guess you know who it is now." Luke Duke:"Yeah. When it comes to nailin' us, Boss is beginning to be a master at splittin' hair."

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:previous:

Skipper, I don't know where you got the first lines from, because the scene goes like this:

Jesse: "You boys knew when you got your probation that you were supposed to report to your Hazzard County Probation Officer every once in a while. Now, now isn't that true?"
Bo: "Yes sir, we did."
Jesse: "Well, then why didn't you?"
Bo: "Because they never told us who the dang guy was."
Jesse: "Watch your language."
Bo: "Yes, sir."
Daisy: "Well, I guess you know who it is now."
Luke: "Yeah, when it comes to nailing us, Boss is getting to be a master at splitting hair."

Maybe you've mixed in lines from this scene in 'Days of Shine and Roses' when they're deciding the rules of the race:

Cooter: "All right, y'all. There's one more thing, that's the cargo. It'll be the usual 10 gallons of shine..."
Jesse: "Now just a minute. The Dukes don't run no real shine. We made a deal with the US of A Federal Government and we don't renege. Besides, I don't want to jeopardize these boys' probation. So we carry water. Ten jugs of water. Is that agreed?"

I've said several times on the Smokey and the Bandit thread, either make your quotes accurate or make it clear that you're paraphrasing. There's enough incorrect information on the internet without any need for HazzardNet to add to it!

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9 hours ago, HossC said:

:previous:

Skipper, I don't know where you got the first lines from, because the scene goes like this:

Jesse: "You boys knew when you got your probation that you were supposed to report to your Hazzard County Probation Officer every once in a while. Now, now isn't that true?"
Bo: "Yes sir, we did."
Jesse: "Well, then why didn't you?"
Bo: "Because they never told us who the dang guy was."
Jesse: "Watch your language."
Bo: "Yes, sir."
Daisy: "Well, I guess you know who it is now."
Luke: "Yeah, when it comes to nailing us, Boss is getting to be a master at splitting hair."

Maybe you've mixed in lines from this scene in 'Days of Shine and Roses' when they're deciding the rules of the race:

Cooter: "All right, y'all. There's one more thing, that's the cargo. It'll be the usual 10 gallons of shine..."
Jesse: "Now just a minute. The Dukes don't run no real shine. We made a deal with the US of A Federal Government and we don't renege. Besides, I don't want to jeopardize these boys' probation. So we carry water. Ten jugs of water. Is that agreed?"

I've said several times on the Smokey and the Bandit thread, either make your quotes accurate or make it clear that you're paraphrasing. There's enough incorrect information on the internet without any need for HazzardNet to add to it!

Sorry. Most of what I get is copied from Facebook friends who play Dukes with me in Messenger and pasted here.

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9 hours ago, HossC said:

:previous:

Skipper, I don't know where you got the first lines from, because the scene goes like this:

Jesse: "You boys knew when you got your probation that you were supposed to report to your Hazzard County Probation Officer every once in a while. Now, now isn't that true?"
Bo: "Yes sir, we did."
Jesse: "Well, then why didn't you?"
Bo: "Because they never told us who the dang guy was."
Jesse: "Watch your language."
Bo: "Yes, sir."
Daisy: "Well, I guess you know who it is now."
Luke: "Yeah, when it comes to nailing us, Boss is getting to be a master at splitting hair."

Maybe you've mixed in lines from this scene in 'Days of Shine and Roses' when they're deciding the rules of the race:

Cooter: "All right, y'all. There's one more thing, that's the cargo. It'll be the usual 10 gallons of shine..."
Jesse: "Now just a minute. The Dukes don't run no real shine. We made a deal with the US of A Federal Government and we don't renege. Besides, I don't want to jeopardize these boys' probation. So we carry water. Ten jugs of water. Is that agreed?"

I've said several times on the Smokey and the Bandit thread, either make your quotes accurate or make it clear that you're paraphrasing. There's enough incorrect information on the internet without any need for HazzardNet to add to it!

Cousin HossC... Feel free to edit anything I get wrong. If you want. :)

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14 hours ago, Skipper Duke said:

Sorry. Most of what I get is copied from Facebook friends who play Dukes with me in Messenger and pasted here.

14 hours ago, Skipper Duke said:

Cousin HossC... True that I should edit and make sure it's correct before pasting. I'll give you that. :)

14 hours ago, Skipper Duke said:

Cousin HossC... Feel free to edit anything I get wrong. If you want. :)

This is a forum, not Facebook. You've spent the last two weeks moaning about Facebook, yet you seem surprised that information received through it is wrong. I'd put Facebook right near the bottom of the pile when it comes to reliable online sources. That's why I regard HazzardNet so highly - there's room for debate and corrections, but the latter are rarely needed because members take time to research their posts if they're posting something factual (and credit sources). I'd rather you posted one accurate, funny quote a week than three dodgy ones every day. The point of favorite quotes is that they're memorable lines that stand out for some reason or other. They're not about cutting and pasting from elsewhere internet. You messaged me recently about my artwork appearing on Facebook (something that I have had to accept happens), but you're basically doing the same thing by reposting here.

The reference sections of HazzardNet (of which this thread is a part) are about quality, not quantity. Also, it took you three posts (above) just to reply to one of mine, wasting space with nonsense. Get your ideas together and check your sources before posting. I'm not expecting every quote to be word perfect, but it shouldn't be my job to correct your posts just because you were too lazy to verify them. That's not part of a moderator's duties, but I'm trying to maintain the high standards that have kept HazzardNet online for so long.

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1 hour ago, HossC said:

This is a forum, not Facebook. You've spent the last two weeks moaning about Facebook, yet you seem surprised that information received through it is wrong. I'd put Facebook right near the bottom of the pile when it comes to reliable online sources. That's why I regard HazzardNet so highly - there's room for debate and corrections, but the latter are rarely needed because members take time to research their posts if they're posting something factual (and credit sources). I'd rather you posted one accurate, funny quote a week than three dodgy ones every day. The point of favorite quotes is that they're memorable lines that stand out for some reason or other. They're not about cutting and pasting from elsewhere internet. You messaged me recently about my artwork appearing on Facebook (something that I have had to accept happens), but you're basically doing the same thing by reposting here.

The reference sections of HazzardNet (of which this thread is a part) are about quality, not quantity. Also, it took you three posts (above) just to reply to one of mine, wasting space with nonsense. Get your ideas together and check your sources before posting. I'm not expecting every quote to be word perfect, but it shouldn't be my job to correct your posts just because you were too lazy to verify them. That's not part of a moderator's duties, but I'm trying to maintain the high standards that have kept HazzardNet online for so long.

Cousin HossC... I'm out of reactions so here is my ❤ for the love reaction. :)

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On 6/23/2022 at 4:06 PM, Skipper Duke said:

Cousin HossC... I'm out of reactions so here is my ❤ for the love reaction. :)

Hey Skipper. You have been one of the best things that has ever happened to HazzardNet and we are lucky to have you. But Hoss does make some good points. Keep posting Cousin. Just pay better attention. 

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