Dukes Meet Bill Elliott

[Skipper Duke]

Balladeer:"It was a bright sunny Saturday morning in Hazzard County. The Duke Boys were up, had breakfast, and got their chores done. Uncle Jesse sent them into town with a list of supplies to pick up for the farm. Bo and Luke were excited when they saw the signs advertising a big race coming up in 3 days. Both boys got so excited their faces displayed big ol' grins with the looks of a cat who ate a Canary." 

Bo:"You know Luke, I can't wait for this race! We need to win, so we can pay off the farm once and for all."

Cue Garrett Duke

[Garrett Duke]

Bo's older cousin, Luke, silently glares at him for a long moment before looking at the poster himself. 

Luke: "Well before you go putting your cart before the horse, hotshot, in order to win the race you first have to enter the race. Where you going to get the money for this so called race? Ya know Uncle Jesse's already stressing over money and Daisy's stressing over how to get food. How you going to get the money to enter that there race?"

 

Cue Roger Duke

[RogerDuke]

"Whoa, Maudeen!" shouted Jesse while plowing the back 40...but the mule just didn't want to stop. The old ridge runner raised his voice much louder, "Now, you listen to me and hold yer horses!" Maudeen stopped in her tracks. 

"I won't be long now Maudeen. I just wanted to wipe this sweat up. It's running like a river from my forehead to my eyes and I can't even see." Maudeen brayed loudly while she turned her neck to look back at him.

"Now you listen here girl. Don't ya go looking at me like ya want to fight 'er somethin'. You know I didn't mean nothin' by it when I said horses." 

He then sighed and looked at the walkie talkie clipped to his overalls. "I just hope today doesn't bring anymore bad news. We could use us some good luck fer a change." 

[Skipper Duke]

Balladeer:"Meanwhile over at courthouse, Boss and Rosco were scheming as usual. Trying to come up with ways to stop the Dukes from entering that race." Boss:"Rosco, you git on over to the Duke Farm and sabotage that General Lee of theirs. Without it, those boys can't enter that race, and then that prize money will be all mine!(He does his evil laugh.) Rosco decides not to do it. Rosco:"Oooh shame, shame, Boss! Now that's naughty naughty! I won't do it this time little fat buddy!" Boss:"Rosco, you numbskull, I pay your salary, I made you and I can break you! Now you'll do what I say, or kiss yer badge goodbye dipstick!"

Cue Garrett Duke 

[Garrett Duke]

Meanwhile across town, Garrett Duke sits in his small apartment, staring at an old magazine he had somehow managed to keep through his move from Atlanta. Only making him to think back to when life was  great and where he felt like he belonged. Knew he belonged. He was accepted. His gang was more than just friends. They were his family. 

Yet here is stuck in this small hicktown where he stands out from everyone else. He can't escape everyone's judgmental stares and the silence that follows him around when he enters the room.

Suddenly a knock brings him out of his thoughts and he stares grudgingly at the door. 

"Yo Garrett," his neighbor across the hall shouts out to remind him he has one friend who seems to get him and accepts him. One. "you gotta open up and see this!"

Garrett rolls his eyes. He may be a friend, but he's always so positive and excited, which gets on  his nerves. Garrett slowly stands up to walk across the the small hallway and over to his locked door. "Um. I'm not sure I know who you are," he states dryly, "or if I can trust you."

"Trust me?" his neighbor's excited voice cracks, "Who bailed you out of jail a year ago when you moved in? It wasn't your family or your supposed friends back home." He once again throws in his face as a constant reminder of how much he owes him. "It was me. I got you out of jail and out of trouble. And you can't trust me? I guess I should have thought twice before trusting you enough to spend my money and time on you."

"Relax," Garrett states as he opens the door, "it was a joke. What's got you all excited for?"

"Lookie what's in the paper today!" he shoves the Hazzard daily newspaper into Garrett's chest before he walks past him, welcoming himself into his apartment before Garrett slams the door behind him. Holding the paper and turning around to face him, he points to the paper. "Well...look at it Mr. Serious." 

Garrett rolls his eyes again before he reluctantly looks down at the front page where the short fat commissioner's picture takes half of the front page of the commissioner smugly standing next to an old race car, his trademark cigar clenched in his mouth. Above the picture in thick black bold letters read: Commissioner J.D. Hogg's Annual Car Race is Back! And Bigger and Badder than Ever Before! Winner takes $1,000 Home with the Gold Trophy! $75 Entry fee!

"Why you so excited about this?" Garrett slowly asks, "You know something is in it for him and that dimwitted sheriff of his."

"You seriously have to ask me that? You got the winning car right outside!" his neighbor shouts excitedly, pointing out the wind, "Think of what you would do with all that money! Heck forget the money," he laughs, "think of the glory rights when you beat your brother and cousin in that ugly orange car!"

Garrett raises a gray eye up at that thought. He was sent to Hazzard to find his long lost twin brother his parents had abandoned in hopes of it changing his ways and to keep him out of jail. Or death. Whatever came first. According to his mother. But it has only built resentment and anger within him at everyone. Especially at everyone ranting and raving about the orange car that can't be stopped. Is so much better than every other car. 

"Or are you afraid of losing to them?" his neighbor jabs at him.

"I won't lose to them. Or to anyone," Garrett angrily corrects him as he throws the paper down on his old scratched wooden table.

"So you say," his neighbor shrugs as he plops down on Garrett's old torn couch, locking his fingers behind his head, "but no one around here has ever beat them two. Or that car."

"Only because I haven't raced them or that ugly car," Garrett snaps back him before slowly sitting down on a wooden kitchen table chair. 

"Well...this is your time to prove yoself, Garrett," he intentionally uses Garrett's street language on him with a big confident smile, "to the town. To your family. To yourself."

Garrett sarcastically laughs. "I don't have to prove nothing to myself. I already know that I'm better than anyone. My car is better than any other car," he dryly states shaking his head. "But Roy."

"Roy's in the house!" Roy grins wildly at Garrett.

"Don't remind me," Garrett rolls his stormy gray eyes at him.

"Well what's your but Roy about?" Roy questions confidently.

"Why are you so excited about this?" Garrett slowly questions as he grabs a cigarette off the table and points at the paper with the cigarette before lighting it, "Why you want me to enter it? Why not you?"

Roy laughs hysterically for a moment before calming down to wave the smoke away from his face. "Well bro," he throws the street language at Garrett, "you know I can't drive worth nothing for starters. I don't have a fast car. Nor the money to get a race car. But you," Roy points at Garrett with a broad smile, "got that nice looking Mustang sitting out back that could leave any other car in the dust."

Garrett shrugs it off before smashing out his cigarette out in a can. "Yeah maybe so," he dryly responds, "but why you so excited about me entering this so called race? What's in it for you?"

"Hey now. I'm your friend...we support each other," Roy smiles mockingly, "plus, I want to be part of Hazzard history when that orange car has found some decent competition out on the race track! As for me," he shrugs, "I'll be riding shot gun...along for the ride!"

Garrett slowly nods at the idea. "Well," he finally states, "I got nothing better to do while I'm stuck in your hicktown...I might as well as show them what I got!"

"Dang right!" Roys states energetically, "Show them what you are made of!"

 

Cue Roger

[RogerDuke]

Jesse hadn't finished the back 40 yet but it was time for lunch. He walked in, happy to see that Daisy already had a hearty meal on the table for him. It was no surprise. He had called her on the walkie talkie a few minutes earlier to let her know he was coming. 

He sat down, folded his hands and muttered a quiet prayer and starting eating some fried chicken, left over from supper yesterday. Daisy then walked in from her bedroom. She looked at her beloved uncle with concern. "Now Uncle Jesse, you look plumb wore out." 

He quickly responded. "Now listen here young lady. Don't you worry none about me. Maudeen is doin' all the work....and thank ya kindly for lunch." 

She still looked concerned, even motherly. "Now, why don't you just plow the back 40 the easy way, with our tractor. You know I rebuilt that carburetor." 

Jesse put his finger over his own lips and spoke quietly. "Now you just hush. Maudeen's right outside and the windows 'er open. She might hear ya. And by the way, have you heard from dem boys?"

[Skipper Duke]

Balladeer:"Meanwhile, Bo and Luke were returning to the farm with the supplies Jesse sent them to town to get." Bo is driving, Luke is riding shotgun. Luke:"Bo, you best hurry cuz. Jesse is waiting for these supplies. Plus not to mention, it's dinner time too. If we're late, he'll skin us alive." Bo:"I'm hurryin' just as fast as the General will allow cuz." Soon they arrive at the farm. They shut the car down, climb out and go into the house.

Cue Garrett 

[Garrett Duke]

Daisy watches her uncle eat silently for a long moment as she is over come with worry and sadness for her uncle. He has been working so hard and so long lately and has been stressing and worrying over the bills that keep piling up and the money that they don't have. A shiver runs down her body as she hears her uncle's soft voice filled with fear, sadness, and tears, in her head, as he had told her the other day that he doesn't know if they will even be able to pay next month's mortgage and that  they might as well as start packing now. She can't imagine a life outside of the Duke farm and doesn't want to and yet she doesn't have a choice. Worse yet, is seeing her strong and proud uncle living in fear of losing the farm he has worked so hard to keep and to make it continue to thrive and know how much this is silently eating him up.

The loud pur of the her cousin's beloved race car, breaks her line of thought. She silently sighs, knowing that the boys don't know how close they are to losing the farm and how much it will hurt them when the truth has to come out.

As Jesse looks up, Daisy steps to the window and states, "They're here."

Cue Roger

[RogerDuke]

A moment later the boys stepped through the door with brown paper bags of groceries and other items. A radiator hose could be seen sticking up out of one bag, pointing toward the ceiling.

Still seated, Jesse looked directly at them with a slightly intimidating glare. "Well, it's good to see you boys finally decided to grace us with an appearance today." Bo and Luke's faces tensed up, knowing he wasn't done. 

"Now, tell me boys, which one of you held up the return trip back to the farm by flirting with girls?" They looked at each other silently and then at same time, both pointed to the other, looking very serious. 

Knowing Jesse couldn't see her, Daisy mischievously smiled, hoping the boys would smile and get in trouble. She didn't know her Uncle could see her reflection in a window. 

"I'm glad you think this is funny Daisy". Her smile ended quickly. "Now you three kids put everything away and while you are doing that, I'll fill this table up with bills....and we are fixin' to have a little math lesson on why it is a problem when there is more money going out than comin' in....a very serious problem.....as in, if we can't fix it, folks will be calling us the Dukes of Hatchapee." 

[Skipper Duke]

Bo:"The Dukes of Hatchapee. That just don't sound right to me. We'll start doing whatever we can to help out Uncle Jesse. We'll get jobs helping folks repair their barns and what not." Luke:"Yeah. Bo's right. In fact, we still have to collect from Granny Annie for the recent repair job we did for her on the roof of her house." Balladeer:"I sure do hope them Dukes come out of this here mess on top of things, don't you?" Meanwhile back in town, at Cooter's Garage. Cooter is seen working on a Mustang which turns out to be Garret Duke's car so affectionately known as Spitting Cobra. 

Cue Garrett 

[Garrett Duke]

Garrett watches the local mechanic from afar in the old hot garage. Standing in the shadows with this his arms folded across his chest, agitated that he was forced to take his beloved car to his brother's and cousin's best friend.  It felt like he was taking his baby to the enemy. 

The mechanic slowly stands up from looking under the hood. "Well," he drawls as he wipes his greasy hands onto a greasy rag as he turns around to face Garrett, "looks like I'll have to order a part for him."

Garrett rolls his hardened eyes at the mechanic and forcefully inhales. "Tell me something I already don't know," he angrily states, "I told you that when I called you and you said that you didn't have the part I asked you for."

Cooter shakes his head in frustration. "And I told you," he forcefully says, "that I wanted to check to see it's the correct part that is needed so I don't order and pay for the wrong part only to have to order and pay for another one."

Garrett stares at him for a long moment until Cooter steps back and looks away with unease. "As if I don't know what's wrong with my OWN car. Or anything about working on cars," Garrett snaps at Cooter, "I may not be one of your friends at the farm with an ugly orange car, but I do know a thing about cars. Probably more than them!"

"I. . .I'm not saying you don't," Cooter stammers, "I just thought it wouldn't hurt to check."

Garrett sarcastically laughs. "What you mean," he pauses dramatically, "is that you wanted to check what I got to tell your boys what they're up against. Well, you can tell them," Garrett takes an intimidating step towards Cooter who takes a step back and bumps into the tools hanging on the wall, "that my driving ability is just as perfect and powerful as Spitting Cobra here is." Garrett angrily spits on the floor. "We both know you wouldn't be second guessing their mechanical skills with that orange car. Don't be questioning mine!"

Cooter shakes his head. "I don't know what you mean," he states before looking out the open garage door as if looking for help. Seeing none he looks back at Garrett who closes the hood of the car, "I'm a mechanic. That's all. I just wanted to get the right part for you."

"Well good," Garrett gives Cooter an evil smile as he digs his keys out from his jean pocket, "get the damn part fast and let me know when it comes in. I'll come pay you for it and pick it up and put it in my car. Myself."

Cooter silently nods as Garrett throws open the door and gets in behind the steering wheel before slamming the door shut, the loud noise echoing off the weak wooden walls of the garage. After a long moment, Cooter inhales deeply before stepping closer to the closed door and shakes his head at Garrett. "You know what," he boldly states with a smile, "I can't do that." His smile broadens as he sees anger rush deeply in Garrett's eyes. "You want to come in here all hot headed and yell at me, well you do you." He throws his hands up in defeat. "I hope you feel better getting all that out of your system. But." he goes quiet momentarily in disbelief of himself standing up to Garrett's well known anger. "I don't have to take it. I won't take it. Nor will Bo, Luke, Daisy, or Jesse. They don't deserve it. I don't deserve it. So," he pauses and points outside of his shadowy garage, "you can take your ugly and rude self and car out of my garage and find your part somewhere else. Because you won't find it or get it here."

Garrett stares at him in disbelief as he takes a cigarette out and lights it before blowing smoke into Cooter's face. "You're pretty proud of yourself right now, aren't you?" Garrett gives Cooter a cold smile, "Well. Unlike Bo and Luke, I'm not on probation. I'm not limited to your trashy garage. I just thought I'd come to you to support local business. Ya know?" Garrett shrugs as he exhales more smoke into Cooter's face, "But I'll be glad to take my money elsewhere and support someone who gives a damn."

"Get out. Now!" Cooter yells, "Or I'll get Sheriff Coltrane here to slap his cuffs on you and you'll be joining your BROTHER on probation for some real charges!"

"It's funny," Garrett states starting his car, "how you and your boys dislike the sheriff when it's convenient, but the second things don't go your way, it's I'm going to the sheriff." Garrett sarcastically laughs as he backs out into the bright summer sun before pulling out into the road and driving back to his apartment.

Cue Roger

[Skipper Duke]

34 minutes ago, Garrett Duke said:

Garrett watches the local mechanic from afar in the old hot garage. Standing in the shadows with this his arms folded across his chest, agitated that he was forced to take his beloved car to his brother's and cousin's best friend.  It felt like he was taking his baby to the enemy. 

The mechanic slowly stands up from looking under the hood. "Well," he drawls as he wipes his greasy hands onto a greasy rag as he turns around to face Garrett, "looks like I'll have to order a part for him."

Garrett rolls his hardened eyes at the mechanic and forcefully inhales. "Tell me something I already don't know," he angrily states, "I told you that when I called you and you said that you didn't have the part I asked you for."

Cooter shakes his head in frustration. "And I told you," he forcefully says, "that I wanted to check to see it's the correct part that is needed so I don't order and pay for the wrong part only to have to order and pay for another one."

Garrett stares at him for a long moment until Cooter steps back and looks away with unease. "As if I don't know what's wrong with my OWN car. Or anything about working on cars," Garrett snaps at Cooter, "I may not be one of your friends at the farm with an ugly orange car, but I do know a thing about cars. Probably more than them!"

"I. . .I'm not saying you don't," Cooter stammers, "I just thought it wouldn't hurt to check."

Garrett sarcastically laughs. "What you mean," he pauses dramatically, "is that you wanted to check what I got to tell your boys what they're up against. Well, you can tell them," Garrett takes an intimidating step towards Cooter who takes a step back and bumps into the tools hanging on the wall, "that my driving ability is just as perfect and powerful as Spitting Cobra here is." Garrett angrily spits on the floor. "We both know you wouldn't be second guessing their mechanical skills with that orange car. Don't be questioning mine!"

Cooter shakes his head. "I don't know what you mean," he states before looking out the open garage door as if looking for help. Seeing none he looks back at Garrett who closes the hood of the car, "I'm a mechanic. That's all. I just wanted to get the right part for you."

"Well good," Garrett gives Cooter an evil smile as he digs his keys out from his jean pocket, "get the damn part fast and let me know when it comes in. I'll come pay you for it and pick it up and put it in my car. Myself."

Cooter silently nods as Garrett throws open the door and gets in behind the steering wheel before slamming the door shut, the loud noise echoing off the weak wooden walls of the garage. After a long moment, Cooter inhales deeply before stepping closer to the closed door and shakes his head at Garrett. "You know what," he boldly states with a smile, "I can't do that." His smile broadens as he sees anger rush deeply in Garrett's eyes. "You want to come in here all hot headed and yell at me, well you do you." He throws his hands up in defeat. "I hope you feel better getting all that out of your system. But." he goes quiet momentarily in disbelief of himself standing up to Garrett's well known anger. "I don't have to take it. I won't take it. Nor will Bo, Luke, Daisy, or Jesse. They don't deserve it. I don't deserve it. So," he pauses and points outside of his shadowy garage, "you can take your ugly and rude self and car out of my garage and find your part somewhere else. Because you won't find it or get it here."

Garrett stares at him in disbelief as he takes a cigarette out and lights it before blowing smoke into Cooter's face. "You're pretty proud of yourself right now, aren't you?" Garrett gives Cooter a cold smile, "Well. Unlike Bo and Luke, I'm not on probation. I'm not limited to your trashy garage. I just thought I'd come to you to support local business. Ya know?" Garrett shrugs as he exhales more smoke into Cooter's face, "But I'll be glad to take my money elsewhere and support someone who gives a damn."

"Get out. Now!" Cooter yells, "Or I'll get Sheriff Coltrane here to slap his cuffs on you and you'll be joining your BROTHER on probation for some real charges!"

"It's funny," Garrett states starting his car, "how you and your boys dislike the sheriff when it's convenient, but the second things don't go your way, it's I'm going to the sheriff." Garrett sarcastically laughs as he backs out into the bright summer sun before pulling out into the road and driving back to his apartment.

Cue Roger

I'm outta reactions. So ❤️

[RogerDuke]

After the meeting about their financial woes finished, Jesse went out to Maudeen while the other 3 stayed inside. He somberly walked his 4-hooved friend and co-worker toward the direction of the back 40, knowing she was more eager than him to get back to the job. A few hundred feet away from the farmhouse he talked to her. 

"You know girl, times sure have changed. My daddy and grandpappy didn't use no horseless carriage to git around. Shucks, they didn't even need a tractor to farm." 

Maudeen brayed "Woops, sorry sweetheart. I didn't mean to use the T-word". He chuckled. "Now don't git me wrong. I understand these modern machines. I had Black Tillie back in my day. But they are expensive. I sure love the General Lee but between you and me,he does get a bit expensive. I bet those boys spent more on parts today than food. If only they could find a way to make money off that orange horseless carriage. Maybe we could climb out of these problems."

[Skipper Duke]

Balladeer:"Meanwhile, back in town, at the courthouse." Boss Hogg:"Rosco, I just got word that that there big wig NASCAR feller Bill Elliott is coming to Hazzard to be in our race. I want you to arrest Mr. Elliott on any charge you can think of. If we have him in custody, it means money for us. We can charge folks a dollar a look. $5 for autographs. $10 for pictures taken with him. $20 for concessions. We'll make a killing Rosco!" Rosco:"Wrong, wrong, wrong, little fat buddy! You're forgetting about one thing." Boss Hogg:"What's that?" Rosco:"The Dukes. How do we keep them from ruining our plans?" Boss Hogg:"I got dem Dukes already all figured out dipstick. Don't worry about that. If they come snooping around, we'll just foreclosure on that blasted farm of theirs, and they'll have to move away from Hazzard. They'll be out of my hair once and for all! Ha hahaha!" Rosco:"But Boss, you don't have much hair. Khee khee!" Boss Hogg:"Rosco, shut up you numbskull! Now, you get out of here, go find Enos, and y'all set up a roadblock on the highway. Boy, is Mr. Elliott in for a surprise when he arrives. He'll be going nowhere but straight to jail! Hahaha!"

Cue Garrett 

[Garrett Duke]

Bill Elliott sits grudgingly in the passenger seat of the old truck, staring in disbelief at the large white billboard sign that shows a fat man in a three piece white suit and a cigar with big letters reading: WELCOME TO HAZZARD! ENJOY YOUR STAY!

"I will not enjoy my stay," he says aloud, breaking the silence before glancing over at the driver seat where his brother and also his crew chief sits with a greasy ball cap upon his head, "Ernie," he hisses, "This has got to be the dumbest idea you have ever had in your entire life."

Ernie laughs hysterically for a moment. "Oh come on Bill," he shakes his head, "lighten up and live a little. Not everything is about super speedways and huge grandstands. We all started out like these hicks back in Dawsonville. You remember those days?"

"Of course I do," Bill throws back, "I cherish those days. But that's not where I am anymore. Where we are any more. We have so much to get ready for Daytona and yet here we are wasting valuable time on at a dirt racetrack we never seen and in a place we never heard of before. Dale Earnhardt is going to win the big race because he's got more practice and time at Daytona than we do because you decided on a road trip."

"C'mon bro," Ernie slaps Bill on his tense shoulders, "this will be fun! These good ol' boys work hard day in and day out. They deserve to have a little fun with a big legend like you."  Ernie allows a long dramatic pause, "Plus," another long pause as he takes in the scenery out of the window, "you promised your big sponsor, McDonalds, to bring it to Hazzard, Georgia in attempt to buy a location."

"I didn't promise nothing!" Bill snaps at him, "You are the one who did the talking. The promising. The lying. Look at this place!" he points out his window, "Why in the world would McDonalds want to build a restaurant here? They won't make a dime compared to Atlanta or some main stay. Who will want to travel to some itty bitty town that no one has ever heard of or cared to go to, to just go to McDonalds? No one...that's who!"

"Wrong brother," Ernie chimes in as he points to the billboard sign of the big round man in a three piece suit, "that man right there would want a McDonalds in his town to draw attention to his town with the lighted arches in an attempt to move forward and away from it's traditional old farm town reputation."

"Do you even know what you are talking about anymore?" Bill shakes his head in disgust, "I'm sure this is a nice town that is full of well deserving and hard working people. I'd glad to join your charity spirit. In the off season. When we don't have a big race in a couple of weeks to get ready for. Richard Petty will be driving circles around us come race day!" Bill allows silence to enter the cab of the truck, "All because you agreed to do some farm town race with some good ol' boys who think they know a thing or two about racing."

"Whether you like it or not, Bill. We are here and we have signed a deal to enter this race with your McDonald's car," Ernie states as he turns on the ignition and gets back on the dusty dirt road to officially enter Hazzard County, "we told the boys we would scout the area out a bit before they join us with the car. Let's go see what the great town of Hazzard is all about. You may love it so much you will want to move and stay here."

"Don't hold your breath," Bill states before silently watching the trees outside of his open window.

Cue Roger

[Garrett Duke]

Garrett Duke shakes his head in disgust as he abruptly turns onto a dusty dirt road as his thoughts return to his argument with Cooter, of the orange car, and of his supposed family. Only to enforce more anger to run deeply within him and to build his yearning to return back to his gang in Atlanta. His true family. The only people that truly understood him. Appreciated him for who he is. Yet thanks to his dad, he's stuck in this little hick town where everyone glares judgmentally at him and where he stands out from everyone else. Where he clearly doesn't belong or fit in. Yet here he is stuck.

Sucking on the last draw of his cigarette, he allows his anger to swell deeply within him before blowing out the smoke and smashing the cigarette butt into the ashtray.  "I'll show them and that ugly orange car who's the better mechanic and the better driver...and who has the best car!" he yells out at no one as an old truck runs past the stop sign on the adjoining road. Garrett slams on his breaks while cussing out loud and his heart sinks deeply within him as he hears the screech of metal, and he watches an old black truck run into the passenger door of his beloved car. Shoving his car into park, he angrily gets out and runs across the hood of his car and out of the side of his eyes, he sees two guys climb out of the truck. Ignoring the people in the truck, he runs over to the passenger door to eye the damage and is slightly relieved at seeing the damage is only to the paint the and the door. "Damn it," he cusses, his anger boils deeply within him despite the minimal damage. This was his car. His baby. And it was supposed to prove Cooter and his friends who the real driver was. 

"Hey sir," a thick southern drawl voice interrupts his angered thoughts, "we are deeply sorry. I. . .I didn't see the stop sign back there and -"

"You didn't see the stop sign?!" Garrett yells turning to finally face the men in the truck, "What are you, blind?!" He goes silent as he looks at the two newcomer who hit his car and he is struck with excitement and anger all at once as he sees Bill Elliott standing near the passenger door of the truck before he looks at his car to reinforce his anger. Sighing deeply, he takes out a cigarette and lights it. "You're Bill Elliott," he states matter of fact, hiding his excitement, and then pointing to the driver, "And you're his brother. His car chief. What in the world would bring you two to this little hick town?"

Bill laughs to break the tension. "Ask my idiot brother who ran into you. I've been asking him the same dang thing."

Ernie rolls his eyes. "Look sir. I'm sorry about your car. I have insurance and papers that we can show you. We will make this right to you," he drawls pointing to the damage he created before pointing back to the stop sign that is covered in thick green leaves from the large tree that hangs above it, "through the tree branches, I didn't see the stop sign, at all. And being new to town and all, I drove through it."

Garrett eyes the hidden stop sign and nods. "Well. I'll give you credit that it is hidden," he pauses to blow out smoke away from the two men, "but all the same, y'all hit my car. But at least, the damage seems to be minimal." He laughs sarcastically. "That there covered stop sign...pretty much represents this hick town and the law they have around here. But," he pauses to drop the cigarette butt onto the dirt road and steps on it with this black boot, "that doesn't answer my question. What brings a well known NASCAR driver and his crew chief, here?"

"Yeah Ernie..." Bill echoes him.

"Well y'all have this race coming up," Ernie finally comes to the answer that they were waiting for, "with the break in our schedule, it is a great opportunity to enter the race to put in some none meaningful practice laps, support our sponsors, and to hang out with the good people that may not have the opportunity to meet my brother here."

"Your brother don't look too happy," Garrett dryly points out.

"Well truth be known," Ernie grins mischievously, "my brother's just an old grump who doesn't like change or to do anything unless it's his way. I'm here to steer him in the right direction whether he appreciates it or not."

Garrett eyes him momentarily as his answer sends him back a couple of years of his dad kicking him out of the house and sending him to Hazzard to supposedly send his life in the right direction despite his anger and hatred towards it.

"I'm ever so thankful," Bill breaks the silence, "I am sure your town and your race will be great. I just have a family I'd like to spend the break with."

Garrett silently nods. "I'm sure people around here will be excited to see you all and to race against you. They don't get this opportunity very often," Garrett answers to break his silence.

Ernie nods in agreement. "We all come from a small town. We know and understand how it is like. We want y'all know we support you and all that you do," he finally responds as he wipes the sweat from his hair before motioning towards Garrett's car behind him, "you race? You enter this race?"

Garrett glances back at Spittin' Cobra. "Yep. That's Spittin' Cobra y'all just ran into," he smiles proudly, "I am entered to race with him, but I am on my way to Atlanta for a part, because the hick mechanic wouldn't order it for me. He think's he's too good for me and wants to support his friend's and their clunker oranger car. So, I'm off to pick it up myself and show him how's it done."

"I love your enthusiasm," Ernie grins at him and takes in Garrett's car.

"Forget Atlanta," Bill pipes in, "we got some boys bringing parts with our car in our trailer. If we got your part, it's your's. Our boys will even fix the damage ol' Ernie did to Spittin' Cobra."

"For real?" Garrett asks with an hint of excitement

"For real," Ernie responds, "our boys scouted out an old abandoned barn up a couple of miles that isn't in use last week. They were able to convince Commissioner J. D. Hogg to let us use it until after the race. So if you meet us there we can get you set up. Our boys should be in town in another hour or so."

Bill glances at Ernie. "What we do until then?" he questions.

"Well Garrett's gonna take us a ride in his car and show us around town and give us all the information we need about this place, the race, and the people we are up against," Ernie grins and wraps a grease stained arm around Garrett's tense shoulders, "Aren't you?"

"Heck yeah!" Garrett yells, his anger subsiding into excitement that he has gained the trust and friendship of Bill Elliott, even more so knowing how jealous Cooter, Bo, and Luke will be once they find out. "How about I follow you to the barn to drop off your truck, and y'all can climb on in?"

"That's a ten four," Ernie drawls as he opens his drivers door and him and Bill get in.

 

***************************************************************************

 

"So Garrett," Ernie breaks the silence as he climbs into back seat of Spitting Cobra as Bill climbs into the passenger door, they both close their doors and the sound thunders against the old wood of the abandoned barn, "what brings you to Hazzard?"

Garrett eyes him momentarily before backing back out onto the dirt road and pulling forward, heading towards the small town. "What makes you so sure, I'm not from here?"

"Well," Bill drawls as he eyes the farm scenery around them, "you have more of a city boy vibe than a country boy attitude to you."

Garrett nods and gives a brief smile as he drives a moment in silence before he slowly and cautiously explains some of his past and what all brought him to Hazzard as well as some of what he feels about Hazzard, his supposed family, and the people in Hazzard.

 

Cue Roger or Skipper 

[Skipper Duke]

2 hours ago, Garrett Duke said:

Garrett Duke shakes his head in disgust as he abruptly turns onto a dusty dirt road as his thoughts return to his argument with Cooter, of the orange car, and of his supposed family. Only to enforce more anger to run deeply within him and to build his yearning to return back to his gang in Atlanta. His true family. The only people that truly understood him. Appreciated him for who he is. Yet thanks to his dad, he's stuck in this little hick town where everyone glares judgmentally at him and where he stands out from everyone else. Where he clearly doesn't belong or fit in. Yet here he is stuck.

Sucking on the last draw of his cigarette, he allows his anger to swell deeply within him before blowing out the smoke and smashing the cigarette butt into the ashtray.  "I'll show them and that ugly orange car who's the better mechanic and the better driver...and who has the best car!" he yells out at no one as an old truck runs past the stop sign on the adjoining road. Garrett slams on his breaks while cussing out loud and his heart sinks deeply within him as he hears the screech of metal, and he watches an old black truck run into the passenger door of his beloved car. Shoving his car into park, he angrily gets out and runs across the hood of his car and out of the side of his eyes, he sees two guys climb out of the truck. Ignoring the people in the truck, he runs over to the passenger door to eye the damage and is slightly relieved at seeing the damage is only to the paint the and the door. "Damn it," he cusses, his anger boils deeply within him despite the minimal damage. This was his car. His baby. And it was supposed to prove Cooter and his friends who the real driver was. 

"Hey sir," a thick southern drawl voice interrupts his angered thoughts, "we are deeply sorry. I. . .I didn't see the stop sign back there and -"

"You didn't see the stop sign?!" Garrett yells turning to finally face the men in the truck, "What are you, blind?!" He goes silent as he looks at the two newcomer who hit his car and he is struck with excitement and anger all at once as he sees Bill Elliott standing near the passenger door of the truck before he looks at his car to reinforce his anger. Sighing deeply, he takes out a cigarette and lights it. "You're Bill Elliott," he states matter of fact, hiding his excitement, and then pointing to the driver, "And you're his brother. His car chief. What in the world would bring you two to this little hick town?"

Bill laughs to break the tension. "Ask my idiot brother who ran into you. I've been asking him the same dang thing."

Ernie rolls his eyes. "Look sir. I'm sorry about your car. I have insurance and papers that we can show you. We will make this right to you," he drawls pointing to the damage he created before pointing back to the stop sign that is covered in thick green leaves from the large tree that hangs above it, "through the tree branches, I didn't see the stop sign, at all. And being new to town and all, I drove through it."

Garrett eyes the hidden stop sign and nods. "Well. I'll give you credit that it is hidden," he pauses to blow out smoke away from the two men, "but all the same, y'all hit my car. But at least, the damage seems to be minimal." He laughs sarcastically. "That there covered stop sign...pretty much represents this hick town and the law they have around here. But," he pauses to drop the cigarette butt onto the dirt road and steps on it with this black boot, "that doesn't answer my question. What brings a well known NASCAR driver and his crew chief, here?"

"Yeah Ernie..." Bill echoes him.

"Well y'all have this race coming up," Ernie finally comes to the answer that they were waiting for, "with the break in our schedule, it is a great opportunity to enter the race to put in some none meaningful practice laps, support our sponsors, and to hang out with the good people that may not have the opportunity to meet my brother here."

"Your brother don't look too happy," Garrett dryly points out.

"Well truth be known," Ernie grins mischievously, "my brother's just an old grump who doesn't like change or to do anything unless it's his way. I'm here to steer him in the right direction whether he appreciates it or not."

Garrett eyes him momentarily as his answer sends him back a couple of years of his dad kicking him out of the house and sending him to Hazzard to supposedly send his life in the right direction despite his anger and hatred towards it.

"I'm ever so thankful," Bill breaks the silence, "I am sure your town and your race will be great. I just have a family I'd like to spend the break with."

Garrett silently nods. "I'm sure people around here will be excited to see you all and to race against you. They don't get this opportunity very often," Garrett answers to break his silence.

Ernie nods in agreement. "We all come from a small town. We know and understand how it is like. We want y'all know we support you and all that you do," he finally responds as he wipes the sweat from his hair before motioning towards Garrett's car behind him, "you race? You enter this race?"

Garrett glances back at Spittin' Cobra. "Yep. That's Spittin' Cobra y'all just ran into," he smiles proudly, "I am entered to race with him, but I am on my way to Atlanta for a part, because the hick mechanic wouldn't order it for me. He think's he's too good for me and wants to support his friend's and their clunker oranger car. So, I'm off to pick it up myself and show him how's it done."

"I love your enthusiasm," Ernie grins at him and takes in Garrett's car.

"Forget Atlanta," Bill pipes in, "we got some boys bringing parts with our car in our trailer. If we got your part, it's your's. Our boys will even fix the damage ol' Ernie did to Spittin' Cobra."

"For real?" Garrett asks with an hint of excitement

"For real," Ernie responds, "our boys scouted out an old abandoned barn up a couple of miles that isn't in use last week. They were able to convince Commissioner J. D. Hogg to let us use it until after the race. So if you meet us there we can get you set up. Our boys should be in town in another hour or so."

Bill glances at Ernie. "What we do until then?" he questions.

"Well Garrett's gonna take us a ride in his car and show us around town and give us all the information we need about this place, the race, and the people we are up against," Ernie grins and wraps a grease stained arm around Garrett's tense shoulders, "Aren't you?"

"Heck yeah!" Garrett yells, his anger subsiding into excitement that he has gained the trust and friendship of Bill Elliott, even more so knowing how jealous Cooter, Bo, and Luke will be once they find out. "How about I follow you to the barn to drop off your truck, and y'all can climb on in?"

"That's a ten four," Ernie drawls as he opens his drivers door and him and Bill get in.

 

***************************************************************************

 

"So Garrett," Ernie breaks the silence as he climbs into back seat of Spitting Cobra as Bill climbs into the passenger door, they both close their doors and the sound thunders against the old wood of the abandoned barn, "what brings you to Hazzard?"

Garrett eyes him momentarily before backing back out onto the dirt road and pulling forward, heading towards the small town. "What makes you so sure, I'm not from here?"

"Well," Bill drawls as he eyes the farm scenery around them, "you have more of a city boy vibe than a country boy attitude to you."

Garrett nods and gives a brief smile as he drives a moment in silence before he slowly and cautiously explains some of his past and what all brought him to Hazzard as well as some of what he feels about Hazzard, his supposed family, and the people in Hazzard.

 

Cue Roger or Skipper 

"Oh my Garrett. That is a lot that brought you here." Bill says. "Yeah. Bill's right. But Hazzard seems like a nice friendly little community." Ernie says. Balladeer:"Well, now Ernie and Bill, I can tell y'all one thing. Ol' Garrett is glad y'all are here. He's been wanting to meet y'all fer a long time." A couple days have passed, and Bill's boys arrive with the 18 wheeler, the cars are inside the trailer. They scour thru the parts supply, and sure enough, they have an extra of that part that Garrett needs for his car. Garrett is excited and offers to pay, but the part is on the house instead. Garrett goes to work installing the new part, his previous anger at Cooter has faded a little now. Bill and Ernie watch in awe as Garret works. "You sure do know a lot about cars boy." Bill says happily. "Yeah. You sure do." Adds in Ernie chipperly.

Cue Garrett or Roger

[RogerDuke]

Jesse finished the Back 40 and returned to the farmhouse after putting Maudeen back in the barn and rewarding her with fresh water and food. They were both exhausted but satisfied that another field had been plowed....his favorite of the 3 big fields, the back 40....and the only one he insisted NOT be done with a tractor because it would break Maudeen's heart. 

He grabbed a glass and drew some water, gulping it down quick and then drew some more. He walked out to the porch and sat down with the water, planning on sipping this glass a little slower. His eyes scanned in all directions and suddenly he noticed something he was surprised he didn't notice a few minutes ago when he got back. The General Lee was missing. Now, where in the world could those boys be? 

[Garrett Duke]

Hearing Ernie's and Bill's compliment to Garrett, brings a rare smile to his face. "Well thank you," he responds, "nothing compared to you all, I'm sure. Thanks for the part and your help."

Bill and Ernie nod. "Well, we kinda owed it to you due to my brother's lousy driving ability," Bill jokingly elbows Ernie in the stomach, "That's why I'm the one behind the wheel and he's the one on top of the tool box."

"Hey now," Ernie responds jokingly, "to my defense, the stop sign was completely covered!"

"Regardless of your sorry excuses, you generally stop before crossing the road," Bill rolls his eyes at his brother, "and you failed to do that. But thanks to your failure we met Garrett here who gave us the tour and information about this here town you somehow found. At least we will be prepared to compete against the locals."

"I'm sure you'd be able to compete against us locals with your eyes closed and stepping foot here," Garrett states as the notorious white Cadillac slowly pulls into the drive way of the old barn. Garrett rolls his eyes and points to it, "Speak of the devil himself. Here comes Commissioner J.D. Hogg. Better known as Boss. Y'all better hold onto your money."

 

[Garrett Duke]

Silence fills the air as the spotless white Cadillac comes to a halt and the driver promptly hops out of the driver's seat to hold open the door as a short round man dressed in a white three piece suit slowly steps out with his signature cigar wrapped tightly with his thick finger. Taking a few steps towards the men working on cars before coming to a halt as the sound of a loud car coming towards them clouds the silent farm land only for his sheriff's car to quickly pull in behind the Cadillac, barely missing it. "Numbskull," he mutters before turning to face the men with the cars and begins to walk towards them once more.

"Nice afternoon, fellas," he states to break the silence as the sheriff's car door slams shut behind him, "I'm Commissioner J.D. Hogg. I run this nice town of Hazzard."

"Well Boss," Garrett is the first to speak up with an ornery look on his face, "that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me."

"Garrett!" Boss yells angrily, "I was talking to them," he points to Bill and Ernie with his cigar, "not you!"

"You hush, Garrett," Sheriff Coltrane says from behind Boss, "he wasn't talking to you!"

Boss stares at his sheriff momentarily. "Nice of you to finally join me," he states to him before turning to Bill and Ernie, "Now boys," he pauses dramatically, "rumor has it, y'all are a big name in that big racing community."

"You mean, in NASCAR?" Garrett says with a sly smile.

"Will you stay out of this, Duke?!" Boss scolds him, "What are you doing here with the likes of them anyway?"

Garrett looks at them coldly for a long moment. "I don't know how to respond that. You tell me to stay out of this," Garrett motions around at Bill and Ernie before turning around to face Boss and Rosco, " and then ask me a question?" 

"Oh never mind you. You wouldn't understand if I were to ask what you're dumb name is," Hogg angrily responds to Garrett, "anyway. Let's forget about him."

"Nah, I don't want to forget him," Ernie interrupts Hogg to earn an angry dark look from the man in white, "I like him. He's nice. You don't seem so nice with your attitude and name calling."

Rosco begins to laugh before Hogg turns his angry glare upon him. "OK you hush you big city man," Rosco snaps after seeing Hogg's look, "Boss Hogg is the commissioner of this nice town and he is to be respected and liked."

"This nice town?" Ernie questions, "If it was a nice town, y'all would have your trees trimmed so we could see the stop signs and we'd be receiving a warm welcoming. Instead of whatever you call this..."

"What stop signs covered in trees?" Rosco asks, pretending to care.

"You numbskull. This is getting us nowhere!" Hogg snaps at his sheriff before turning back to Bill and Ernie, "As I was saying," he pauses to suck on the butt of his cigar and lets out of a cloud of smoke before continuing, "Rumor has it, y'all got a big name. And I like big names. They attract people. And people attract money. And I like money."

Garrett laughs. "Do you even know what they're names are, Boss?" he questions and Hogg glares angrily at him, "I'm just asking, because it seems like you are clueless."

"I've been told it's Elliott Bill," Hogg slowly and unsurely responds to receive a laugh from Bill and Ernie before Rosco whispers something in his ear and Hogg forces a smile. "I was wanting to see if y'all were awake or not. Of course I know who he is. It's Bill Elliott, he races cars."

"What ya know," Garrett is the first to speak up, "the ol' sheriff does know something. Did Flash tell you?"

"You hush, Duke!" Rosco yells at Garrett.

"Who is Flash?" Ernie questions, "Sounds like a race car's name!"

Rosco laughs. "He's even better than a race car!" he states proudly, "He's my police dog!"

Boss rolls his dark eyes. "Gentlemen!" he yells, "I'm here to talk about my race tomorrow, not some dumb dog!"

"I beg your pardon. Flash is not dumb. He must be smarter than you to know who Bill Elliott is," Rosco snaps back, "I think you owe him a num-num when we get back to the station."

"A num-num?! I'll give you a num-num!" Hogg yells lift up his fat fist before Garrett lighting up a cigarette brings his attention back to Bill and Ernie and he forces a smile. "I'm sorry gentleman. My sheriff doesn't have much of a brain and gets to me sometimes. I'll deal with him later."

"Brain or no brain," Ernie grins, "he's still nicer than you have been."

"If you don't hush, I'll have my brainless sheriff lock you behind bars!" Boss yells at him and Rosco yanks out his handcuffs with a smile on his face before Boss blocks him, "As I was saying, I'm here to talk about tomorrow's race. I have a big time driver to drive for me -" 

"You have a big time driver to drive for you?" Garrett is quick to interrupt him, "Now who is that, Boss? Ol' Rosco here?"

Boss stares coldly at Garrett. "I told you to stay out of this! I'm not here for the lousy likes of you!"  Boss yells, "Never mind. It don't matter, because Rosco here is going to arrest you."

"For what?" Garrett asks, eyeing Boss coldly and Boss steps back into Rosco, "For asking who your driver is?"

"For being obstinate and getting in the way of justice," Boss spits back at him. "Rosco. Do your job!"

"Hold on a minute!" Bill breaks his silence, "Garrett hasn't done anything wrong other than to question you and your foolishness! You lie hands on him, I'll have my lawyer down here so fast you won't know what hits you! By the time he gets down here, he'll have the sheriff's badge and your job!"

Boss eyes him. "You wouldn't!" he yells.

"I would," Bill confidently states, "what you are doing is wrong and you know it. Even your sheriff knows it. Now step back and put the cuffs away!"

Boss slowly nods and motions Rosco to step back and put his cuffs away. "Fine. But our eyes are on you boy. One step out of the line and we'll have you in jail before you can light your filthy cigarette," Hogg threatens Garrett, "in the meantime, you get. I got business to do with Bill here."

"I am not here to do business with you or anyone," Bill cuts in, "Garrett was here before you. So if anyone is to leave, it's you and your sorry law."

"Well then. I guess I'll tell my driver he still has the job and the paycheck," Boss states smugly.

"Oooh, I get a paycheck now too!" Rosco giggles.

"Shut up!" Boss yells at him, blowing smoke in his face.

"If I was your driver," Bill draws, "I would quit and come race for me tomorrow. No one deserves the lack of respect you show everyone. They are undeserving of your paycheck. I wouldn't want to even touch your paycheck. It's probably as filthy as you are!"

Hogg angrily looks around at everyone. "I should have all of you arrested!" he yells before turning and walking back to his car where his driver closes the door behind him. "Come on Rosco. We got practice to do to win that race tomorrow!"

Bill, Ernie, and Garrett all watch the two vehicles quickly drive away, throwing dirt from the road behind them. As silence starts to build, they turn back to face each other and their vehicles. "Wow," Ernie breaks the silence, "they're a piece of work."

 

CUE ROGER OR SKIPPER

[Skipper Duke]

6 hours ago, Garrett Duke said:

Silence fills the air as the spotless white Cadillac comes to a halt and the driver promptly hops out of the driver's seat to hold open the door as a short round man dressed in a white three piece suit slowly steps out with his signature cigar wrapped tightly with his thick finger. Taking a few steps towards the men working on cars before coming to a halt as the sound of a loud car coming towards them clouds the silent farm land only for his sheriff's car to quickly pull in behind the Cadillac, barely missing it. "Numbskull," he mutters before turning to face the men with the cars and begins to walk towards them once more.

"Nice afternoon, fellas," he states to break the silence as the sheriff's car door slams shut behind him, "I'm Commissioner J.D. Hogg. I run this nice town of Hazzard."

"Well Boss," Garrett is the first to speak up with an ornery look on his face, "that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me."

"Garrett!" Boss yells angrily, "I was talking to them," he points to Bill and Ernie with his cigar, "not you!"

"You hush, Garrett," Sheriff Coltrane says from behind Boss, "he wasn't talking to you!"

Boss stares at his sheriff momentarily. "Nice of you to finally join me," he states to him before turning to Bill and Ernie, "Now boys," he pauses dramatically, "rumor has it, y'all are a big name in that big racing community."

"You mean, in NASCAR?" Garrett says with a sly smile.

"Will you stay out of this, Duke?!" Boss scolds him, "What are you doing here with the likes of them anyway?"

Garrett looks at them coldly for a long moment. "I don't know how to respond that. You tell me to stay out of this," Garrett motions around at Bill and Ernie before turning around to face Boss and Rosco, " and then ask me a question?" 

"Oh never mind you. You wouldn't understand if I were to ask what you're dumb name is," Hogg angrily responds to Garrett, "anyway. Let's forget about him."

"Nah, I don't want to forget him," Ernie interrupts Hogg to earn an angry dark look from the man in white, "I like him. He's nice. You don't seem so nice with your attitude and name calling."

Rosco begins to laugh before Hogg turns his angry glare upon him. "OK you hush you big city man," Rosco snaps after seeing Hogg's look, "Boss Hogg is the commissioner of this nice town and he is to be respected and liked."

"This nice town?" Ernie questions, "If it was a nice town, y'all would have your trees trimmed so we could see the stop signs and we'd be receiving a warm welcoming. Instead of whatever you call this..."

"What stop signs covered in trees?" Rosco asks, pretending to care.

"You numbskull. This is getting us nowhere!" Hogg snaps at his sheriff before turning back to Bill and Ernie, "As I was saying," he pauses to suck on the butt of his cigar and lets out of a cloud of smoke before continuing, "Rumor has it, y'all got a big name. And I like big names. They attract people. And people attract money. And I like money."

Garrett laughs. "Do you even know what they're names are, Boss?" he questions and Hogg glares angrily at him, "I'm just asking, because it seems like you are clueless."

"I've been told it's Elliott Bill," Hogg slowly and unsurely responds to receive a laugh from Bill and Ernie before Rosco whispers something in his ear and Hogg forces a smile. "I was wanting to see if y'all were awake or not. Of course I know who he is. It's Bill Elliott, he races cars."

"What ya know," Garrett is the first to speak up, "the ol' sheriff does know something. Did Flash tell you?"

"You hush, Duke!" Rosco yells at Garrett.

"Who is Flash?" Ernie questions, "Sounds like a race car's name!"

Rosco laughs. "He's even better than a race car!" he states proudly, "He's my police dog!"

Boss rolls his dark eyes. "Gentlemen!" he yells, "I'm here to talk about my race tomorrow, not some dumb dog!"

"I beg your pardon. Flash is not dumb. He must be smarter than you to know who Bill Elliott is," Rosco snaps back, "I think you owe him a num-num when we get back to the station."

"A num-num?! I'll give you a num-num!" Hogg yells lift up his fat fist before Garrett lighting up a cigarette brings his attention back to Bill and Ernie and he forces a smile. "I'm sorry gentleman. My sheriff doesn't have much of a brain and gets to me sometimes. I'll deal with him later."

"Brain or no brain," Ernie grins, "he's still nicer than you have been."

"If you don't hush, I'll have my brainless sheriff lock you behind bars!" Boss yells at him and Rosco yanks out his handcuffs with a smile on his face before Boss blocks him, "As I was saying, I'm here to talk about tomorrow's race. I have a big time driver to drive for me -" 

"You have a big time driver to drive for you?" Garrett is quick to interrupt him, "Now who is that, Boss? Ol' Rosco here?"

Boss stares coldly at Garrett. "I told you to stay out of this! I'm not here for the lousy likes of you!"  Boss yells, "Never mind. It don't matter, because Rosco here is going to arrest you."

"For what?" Garrett asks, eyeing Boss coldly and Boss steps back into Rosco, "For asking who your driver is?"

"For being obstinate and getting in the way of justice," Boss spits back at him. "Rosco. Do your job!"

"Hold on a minute!" Bill breaks his silence, "Garrett hasn't done anything wrong other than to question you and your foolishness! You lie hands on him, I'll have my lawyer down here so fast you won't know what hits you! By the time he gets down here, he'll have the sheriff's badge and your job!"

Boss eyes him. "You wouldn't!" he yells.

"I would," Bill confidently states, "what you are doing is wrong and you know it. Even your sheriff knows it. Now step back and put the cuffs away!"

Boss slowly nods and motions Rosco to step back and put his cuffs away. "Fine. But our eyes are on you boy. One step out of the line and we'll have you in jail before you can light your filthy cigarette," Hogg threatens Garrett, "in the meantime, you get. I got business to do with Bill here."

"I am not here to do business with you or anyone," Bill cuts in, "Garrett was here before you. So if anyone is to leave, it's you and your sorry law."

"Well then. I guess I'll tell my driver he still has the job and the paycheck," Boss states smugly.

"Oooh, I get a paycheck now too!" Rosco giggles.

"Shut up!" Boss yells at him, blowing smoke in his face.

"If I was your driver," Bill draws, "I would quit and come race for me tomorrow. No one deserves the lack of respect you show everyone. They are undeserving of your paycheck. I wouldn't want to even touch your paycheck. It's probably as filthy as you are!"

Hogg angrily looks around at everyone. "I should have all of you arrested!" he yells before turning and walking back to his car where his driver closes the door behind him. "Come on Rosco. We got practice to do to win that race tomorrow!"

Bill, Ernie, and Garrett all watch the two vehicles quickly drive away, throwing dirt from the road behind them. As silence starts to build, they turn back to face each other and their vehicles. "Wow," Ernie breaks the silence, "they're a piece of work."

 

CUE ROGER OR SKIPPER

Balladeer:"Long about this time, ol' Boss an' Rosco were arriving back in town at the Courthouse." Rosco:"Can you believe the nerve of them little fat buddy, telling you to shut up and all that stuff?" Boss:"Rosco I want you to go back and spy on those rogues, and when the coast is clear, sabotage their mangy cars! Ha ha ha! They'll be sorry they crossed me! Them and that sad sorry Duke will all be behind bars 'til the cows come home!" Rosco:"Oooh goodie! Don't you worry about a thing Boss. I'll cuff 'em an' stuff 'em! Khee khee khee I love it I love it, police work's my life!" Boss:"Get on it you lamebrain knuckleheaded dodo!" Rosco:"Oooh that's not nice!" Boss:"Oooh will you just go already!" Rosco:"I'm gone! Khee khee khee!" Boss(to self after Rosco leaves.)"So are Bill, Ernie an' that dang Duke Boy!" Rosco shows back up. Ernie:"Bill, Garrett, don't look now but here comes that brainless Sheriff again."

CUE ROGER OR GARRETT 

[RogerDuke]

Jesse let out a grunt as he rose from his front porch chair, his knees were not too pleased that the sit-down rest was so brief. He walked into the kitchen and yelled for Daisy. When there was no response he yelled again louder but still nothing. 

"What in the world is going on around this place?" He asked out loud as he was walking toward the CB and then keyed up the mic. "Shepherd to lost sleep. Shepherd to lost sheep. Ya got yer ears on?" Once again he waited for a response and once again got none. "This here is Shepherd calling the lost sheep. Now if you boys don't answer right away I'm coming to look for you." 

A response crackled over the airway "Um, excuse me Mr. Uncle Jesse but I just saw the General Lee heading to town along Old River Road." 

Jesse recognized Cooter's voice. "Was Daisy with them?" 

"Well sir, I couldn't rightly tell, I was busy pulling Swamp Molly out of the ditch and didn't git a close look." 

Jesse sighed "Thanks Cooter. If you see them again flag 'em down and tell 'em to turn their CB on....or maybe it's broke." 

"Will do Uncle Jesse. Crazy Cooter out" 

Jesse grabbed his red hat off the hook that he had placed there only a few minutes ago. He walked out of the house and into his truck muttering to himself "It's probably just the radio but ya never with them boys. Besides, rumor has it Boss Hogg has been hanging out with some outta town folks. That's never good. I'd better go check it out. Stones, dirt and dust flew from under his back tires when he hit the gas. 

[Garrett Duke]

Garrett looks up from what he was doing after Ernie called his attention to Rosco. "What in the world is he doing now?" he questions as he glares at the sheriff who is standing half way behind a large old tree.

"Looks like he's trying to spy on us," Bill comments as he motions to the sheriff's binoculars.

"Looks like it," Garrett nods, "wouldn't be the first time he's done something like that. That fat commissioner probably put him up to it to get to us. Probably going to try to sabotage our cars so we can't race against him." He gives a sarcastic laugh, "He knows that's the only way he can win."

Bill quietly shakes his head.

"You really got a messed up law around here," Ernie states as he readjusts his hat, "You know what we should do?"

Bill and Garrett look at each other before glancing at Ernie and shake their heads at him. Ernie motions them closer and they slowly take a step closer to him. "C'mon Ernie," Bill states impatiently, "what is it?"

"We should go," Ernie states, "we came to Hazzard to support our sponsors as well as spread some light on some small town racing. But no sponsor is worth this hassle of being stalked by the sheriff and the crooked law. Garrett," he pauses to look at Garrett, "I don't know where that will put you, but it's been fun running into you."

"Rather literally," Bill comments sarcastically.

"I should have known how this would turn out just by that hidden stop sign," Ernie cusses under his breath.

Bill shakes his head to draw more silence as Garrett lights a cigarette. "We can't just leave our new friend to deal with that loser," Bill firmly states. "We should leave this area and find a more secure place that will be safe from him. Then come race time, show him who's boss."

Ernie slowly nods. "But where would that more secure place be?" he asks and they both look at Garrett.

"Uh. Um," Garrett stutters as he glances around, "I really hate to say this," he pauses to blow out smoke, "but the only place I can think of that would be safe from them would be at my uncle's farm. My cousins and brother have a beef with them over a mile wide and they'd do anything to protect anyone from them."

"Why you hate to say it?" Ernie raises a bushy eye brow at him.

"It's a long story. To  make it short, we don't always get along," Garrett sighs heavily, "I wish I could say my place, but my apartment wouldn't hold all of us not alone these cars. They have a big barn to store them in and they'd make sure Rosco wouldn't get to it." Garrett goes quiet as he tosses the butt of the cigarette onto the ground and smashes it up with his heavy leather work boots. Looking at Ernie and Bill, he reluctantly says, "They're all honest to a fault. You can trust them with your cars...and your life if you want to take it that far."

"Sweet," Ernie quickly replies, "What are we waiting for? How about you lead the way."

"Now hold on, Ern," Bill calmly states, "Just because Garrett says we can trust them, doesn't mean we should go. How would you like it if some random people just randomly show up at your door, because someone said you'd be trusted."

Ernie laughs hysterically. "Who would that be?" Ernie finally asks,

"Someone not very smart," Bill quickly responds, "But that's besides the point. How'd you feel?"

Ernie shrugs thoughtfully for a moment. 

"Don't worry about it," Garrett says impatiently, "they will be excited to have a local NASCAR hero showing up at their door unannounced. They'll be even more excited to help keep Boss and Rosco away from your cars. That's just how they are."

Bill reluctantly nods. "What about your's?" he questions.

Garrett shrugs it off. "There's no time to worry about that right now. We just got to go," he takes a step to his car, "I'll lead you to the Duke farm and I'll introduce you to them. You'll love them and I'm sure they'll love you. I'm sure they are preparing their own car for the race."

"Heck ya!" Ernie shouts as they all go to their cars and quickly speed away from the sheriff who angrily goes to his car only to trip on a stick and land in a pile of mud.

CUE ROGER OR SKIPPER

 

[Skipper Duke]

44 minutes ago, Garrett Duke said:

Garrett looks up from what he was doing after Ernie called his attention to Rosco. "What in the world is he doing now?" he questions as he glares at the sheriff who is standing half way behind a large old tree.

"Looks like he's trying to spy on us," Bill comments as he motions to the sheriff's binoculars.

"Looks like it," Garrett nods, "wouldn't be the first time he's done something like that. That fat commissioner probably put him up to it to get to us. Probably going to try to sabotage our cars so we can't race against him." He gives a sarcastic laugh, "He knows that's the only way he can win."

Bill quietly shakes his head.

"You really got a messed up law around here," Ernie states as he readjusts his hat, "You know what we should do?"

Bill and Garrett look at each other before glancing at Ernie and shake their heads at him. Ernie motions them closer and they slowly take a step closer to him. "C'mon Ernie," Bill states impatiently, "what is it?"

"We should go," Ernie states, "we came to Hazzard to support our sponsors as well as spread some light on some small town racing. But no sponsor is worth this hassle of being stalked by the sheriff and the crooked law. Garrett," he pauses to look at Garrett, "I don't know where that will put you, but it's been fun running into you."

"Rather literally," Bill comments sarcastically.

"I should have known how this would turn out just by that hidden stop sign," Ernie cusses under his breath.

Bill shakes his head to draw more silence as Garrett lights a cigarette. "We can't just leave our new friend to deal with that loser," Bill firmly states. "We should leave this area and find a more secure place that will be safe from him. Then come race time, show him who's boss."

Ernie slowly nods. "But where would that more secure place be?" he asks and they both look at Garrett.

"Uh. Um," Garrett stutters as he glances around, "I really hate to say this," he pauses to blow out smoke, "but the only place I can think of that would be safe from them would be at my uncle's farm. My cousins and brother have a beef with them over a mile wide and they'd do anything to protect anyone from them."

"Why you hate to say it?" Ernie raises a bushy eye brow at him.

"It's a long story. To  make it short, we don't always get along," Garrett sighs heavily, "I wish I could say my place, but my apartment wouldn't hold all of us not alone these cars. They have a big barn to store them in and they'd make sure Rosco wouldn't get to it." Garrett goes quiet as he tosses the butt of the cigarette onto the ground and smashes it up with his heavy leather work boots. Looking at Ernie and Bill, he reluctantly says, "They're all honest to a fault. You can trust them with your cars...and your life if you want to take it that far."

"Sweet," Ernie quickly replies, "What are we waiting for? How about you lead the way."

"Now hold on, Ern," Bill calmly states, "Just because Garrett says we can trust them, doesn't mean we should go. How would you like it if some random people just randomly show up at your door, because someone said you'd be trusted."

Ernie laughs hysterically. "Who would that be?" Ernie finally asks,

"Someone not very smart," Bill quickly responds, "But that's besides the point. How'd you feel?"

Ernie shrugs thoughtfully for a moment. 

"Don't worry about it," Garrett says impatiently, "they will be excited to have a local NASCAR hero showing up at their door unannounced. They'll be even more excited to help keep Boss and Rosco away from your cars. That's just how they are."

Bill reluctantly nods. "What about your's?" he questions.

Garrett shrugs it off. "There's no time to worry about that right now. We just got to go," he takes a step to his car, "I'll lead you to the Duke farm and I'll introduce you to them. You'll love them and I'm sure they'll love you. I'm sure they are preparing their own car for the race."

"Heck ya!" Ernie shouts as they all go to their cars and quickly speed away from the sheriff who angrily goes to his car only to trip on a stick and land in a pile of mud.

CUE ROGER OR SKIPPER

 

Balladeer(About Rosco's trip.)"Uh huh. I saw that comin'!" Rosco:"Oooh khee khee darn stick! If it was human, I'd cuff it and stuff it! Doh ho I love it I love it!" He gets in the car, and follows Garrett, Bill and Ernie. "I'll get 'em. The Boss is gonna be so proud of me Valvet Ears! Oooh!" Flash whines as if to say "That'll be the day!" Meanwhile over at the Duke Farm, they are just finishing up evening chores, when 3 cars show up. Uncle Jesse:"Boys, Daisy, we got company!" He shouts. The boys and Daisy come out of the barn, to see who's arriving.

CUE ROGER OR GARRETT 

[Garrett Duke]

Garrett glances in his rearview mirror to make sure Bill and Ernie were still following him as well as to make sure that Rosco has yet made his way out of the pond that they lost him in several miles back. Sighing heavily, he looks back ahead just in time to see the old Duke farm coming into view. His heart sinks with dread at the thought of delivering Bill and Ernie at Bo and Luke's door step and know how excited they will be when they see the NASCAR legend at their farm, seeking their help.

Despite the dread and anger the thought brings to Garrett, he knows that there is no other option and that if he wants Ernie and Bill to be taken care of as well as their vehicles, that there is no other option. Other than maybe Cooter's and after his earlier encounter with the mechanic, this seemed to be the better option. 

Pulling into the Duke farm, his emotions swarm heavily within him to see Jesse standing out front with Bo, Luke, and Daisy all stepping out of the farm house to see who was coming. Garrett ignores them and pulls through the barn to the opposite side, so that Ernie can pull his car and trailer into the barn in a vague attempt to hide it.  Watching them pull up and park in the garage, Garrett pulls his car back around out front. 

Climbing out of his car, Garrett takes a deep breath in attempt to calm or hide his emotions. "Jesse," he nods at his uncle and then at Bo, Luke, and Daisy. "So I um..." he lets his sentence drag and Ernie and Bill slowly walk out of the barn, "I like to introduce you to a couple of friends who are in need of hiding from your law." Garett pauses to let them join them, "This is -"

"You think we're dumb, Garrett?" Bo snaps, "That there is Ernie and Bill Elliott! How were they so unfortunate to run into the likes of you?!"

"Bo," Jesse states sternly in attempt to halt any upcoming fights, "be nice."

"Yes sir," Bo sighs reluctantly.

"Well," Bill dryly speaks, poking his brother in the side, "it's Garrett that's the unfortunate one as my brother here literally ran into him."

"Will you give me a break, already? I mean you were there and the stop sign was clearly covered by the tree branch," Ernie jokingly covers for himself before turning to face the family in front of him, "But he's right...Garrett's the unfortunate victim here. We're the fortunate ones as he has been able to protect us from your clown like law you got. If it weren't for him, we'd be having to sign a deal with a fat man in a white suit and he'd probably have the man he called a sheriff driving my car. "

Bill nods. "But now they know where our car was and where we were hiding to get our car ready for the race," Bill continues Ernie's story, "the sheriff was there to do something with it. He was spying on us."

"If that's what you want to call it," Ernie interrupts his brother, "he couldn't have been any more obvious."

"Sounds like ol' Rosco," Luke chuckles.

"So thanks to Garrett here," Bill continues, pointing at Garrett who leans back against his car; wishing he was invisible to it all, "he suggested y'all are the ones to trust during this time so that we can protect our car and get it ready for the race. I. . .I," Bill stutters nervously, glancing at the family in front of him, "I'm sorry to just welcome ourselves to your farm and to show up uninvited. If y'all would rather we go else where, we would be glad to go and fully understand."

"Leave?" Luke questions, "Not a chance that will happen until you are ready to leave. We can shut them doors and have someone out here to guard the barn at all hours until the race comes and you have to leave."

Jesse nods. "The boy's right. You are always welcome here," he smiles welcoming, "anyone who disagrees with the law here, are friends of ours."

"We appreciate it," Bill responds looking from person to person.

"Since Garrett forgot who we are," Bo rudely states, "I'm Bo Duke, this is my cousin, Luke Duke," he points at Luke and then  points at Daisy, "this is our cousin, Daisy Duke. And then," he motions at Jesse, "that's our uncle, Jesse Duke."

"So..." Ernie slowly states, "I take it that y'all and Garrett here don't get along."

Jesse glares over at Bo momentarily and then at Garrett. "Those two are twins," he slowly states, "who don't see eye to eye." Jesse finally answers. "They all have different views and attituded. Garrett here grew up in Atlanta and in the city life. Bo here, grew up here in  Hazzard in a small town. Maybe one day, they'll be mature enough to put their differences aside and accept each other."

"It's not just me," Bo says defensively, "we've all had our issues with him. Even ask Cooter."

"Cooter's not here to ask," Jesse quickly snaps at him, "we are here to welcome these folks to our farm, not scare them away with your rudeness! I am sorry Ernie and Bill. Not all of us are as rude as Bo here is."

"I agree. For now, let's just forget about Garrett," Luke responds, "no, no not forget about him. But about our differences with him." Luke shakes his head in disgust with himself at how that came out. "I think we should focus on helping you all out. Thank you Garrett," Luke nods at Garrett, "for bringing them to the farm and allowing us to help you all."

"Bravo Garrett!" Daisy claps her hands in excitement, "You brought NASCAR legend to our farm! Thanks to you, we all will be able to race alongside the great Bill Elliott!" she cheers. "Well not us all. Jesse and I will be spectators, but the boys, Garrett will be out there racing."

Garrett nods in appreciation at her. "Don't thank me," he dryly shrugs off the appreciation, "I did it for them. So maybe thank the tree branch for hiding the stop sign that allowed them to hit me."

"In other words," Luke laughs, "thank Rosco for all his speed traps?!"

Everyone laughs at Luke's comment. 

"Talking of which," Ernie states after the laughter fades away, "he should be climbing out of the pond right about now that Garrett shoved him into on the way here. I'm sure he won't be too happy with us."

More laughter erupts. "Well, we will be ready for him if he makes his way to the farm," Jesse slowly states as he eyes the sky for a moment, "but for now, supper should be about ready. Is there enough for everyone, Daisy?"

"Sure is," she smiles around at everyone. "We better get to it before it gets too cold."

Bill looks unsurely at them and the back at the barn and Luke catches up on it. "We can keep an eye on it from the table by keeping the door open. It'll be fine."

Garrett watches them move to the house before Jesse stops and motions him in. "Thank you Jesse, but I got to get back to my apartment," Garrett nods at his elderly uncle before turning around and getting back into his car and drives down the drive way. He stops at the road before stopping and watching everyone disappears inside the old farm house before he lights another cigarette and drives away. 

 

CUE ROGER OR SKIPPER