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Gilligan's Island(1964-1967)


Skipper Duke
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Dusty's Trail scene. Episode where the treasure was a Kansas town and the map treasure map showed how to get there. Daphne was tired from searching for the map.  Daphne Brookhaven:"Carter, I'm exhausted!" Carter Brookhaven: "Just keep saying to yourself dear "Money money money! It gives you strength!"

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(Season 1 Home Sweet Hut)

Mr. Howell:"You can have the bed room to yourself! I'll sleep out here tonight!" Mrs. Howell:"You can sleep out there tomorrow night too!" Skipper:"What was that Gilligan!?" Mr. Howell:"I wonder if I might trouble you for my pillow!?" Mrs. Howell:"No trouble at all! Here's your pillow, here's your blanket! And here's your Teddy Bear!" Skipper:"Teddy Bear!?" Gilligan:"Air! Get up, please!"

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(Season 2 Not Guilty)

Professor:"Ah gentlemen you're just in time!" Skipper:"We are!?" Professor:"Yes." Skipper:"Is that what I think it is?" Professor:"A guillotine? Yes. And believe me, it's gonna eliminate a lot of man power!" Gilligan:"I believe you!" Professor:"Watch how easy it's gonna be to chop coconuts! And it never misses!" Skipper:"We'll see you later Professor! I think my Little Buddy here kind of developed got a sore throat!" Professor:"Oh I could take care of that!" Gilligan:"Never mind!"

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(Season 3 The Producer)

Based on another post today - here is “Hamlet: The Musical” by the Castaways of Gilligan’s Island     
     
Act I     
[The curtain rises. Hamlet stands stage center.]     
HAMLET: (Sings)     
I ask to be or not to be, A rogue or peasant slave is what you see; A boy who loved his mother’s knee, And so I ask to be or not to be. So here’s my plea, I beg of you, And say you see a little hope for me. To fight or flee, to fight or flee, I ask myself to be or not to be.     
     
[Enter King Claudius and Queen Certrude]     
CLAUDIUS AND GERTRUDE:     
(Sing) He asks to be or not to be, A rogue or      
peasant slave is what you see;     
     
GERTRUDE: (Sings) My son who loved his mother’s knee,     
     
CLAUDIUS AND GERTRUDE: (Sing) And so he asks to be or not to be. So here’s his plea, we beg of thee, And say we see a little hope for he.     
     
HAMLET: (Sings) To fight or flee, to fight or flee, I ask myself to be or not to be.     
     
Exit Claudius and Certrude.
     
HAMLET: Hark! I do believe I hear the fair Ophelia.     
     
Enter Ophelia     
     
OPHELIA: My Lord Hamlet is troubled.     
     
HAMLET: Yea, verily, my heart is heavy. I cannot marry thee, Ophelia. There is nothing left for you, but to get thee to a notary.     
     
OPHELIA: Ah, my poor Hamlet. Ah, my poor Hamlet. (Sings) Hamlet, dear, your problem is clear, Avenging thy father’s death; You seek to harm your uncle and mom, But you’re scaring me to death. While I die and sigh and cry,      
That love is everything; You’re content to try to touch, The conscience of a king. Since the day when your dad met his fate, You just brood and you don’t touch your food; You      
hate your ma, mad at my pa, You’ll kill the king or some  silly thing. So Hamlet. Hamlet, do be a man, let Rotten enough alone. From Ophelia no one can steal yea You’ll  always be my own, Leave the gravedigger’s scene, If you      
know what I mean. Danish pastry for two, For me, for you.     
     
HAMLET: In truth Ophelia, you have said a mouthful.     
     
OPHELIA: Hamlet, I have so much more to offer. But hark! Me thinks me hear the heavy footsteps of my father, Polonius.     
     
HAMLET: And the laughter of your brother and my friend, Laertes.     
     
OPHELIA: Oh, they must not find us here. But where to hide?     
     
HAMLET: Hide anyplace. But don’t go near the water.     

[Exit Hamlet and Ophelia]     
     
LAERTES: Father, my ship sails at the tide.     
     
POLONIUS: A mornent, my son, for I have something to tell you.     
     
LAERTES: But I ask only for my allowance.     
     
POLONIUS: Ah, but I shall give you something far more available: advice.     
     
LAERTES:     
Do you know how much wine you can buy in Paris with advice?     
     
POLONIUS: Paris is a wild and wicked town. And you are but a young and innocent boy.     
     
LAERTES: (To audience) Oh, could I tell him a few stories.     
     
POLONIUS: Heed my words, Laertes, and you’ll be safe.     
     
LAERTES: (To audience) Unless I listen, I won’t get my spending money. So I’ll listen, I’ll listen.     
     
POLONIUS: (Sings) Neither a borrower nor a lender be, Do not forget: Stay out of debt; Think twice, and take this good advice from me, Guard that old solvency. There’s just one other thing you ought to do. To thine own self be true.     
     
[Enter entire cast]     
ALL: (Sing)     
Neither a borrower nor a lender be, Do not forget: Stay out of debt; Think twice, and take this good advice from me, Guard that old solvency. There’s just one other thing you ought to do, To thine own self be true.

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(Season 3 The Kidnapper)

Gilligan:"Help! Help! Help! Professor! Light the torch! Light the torch!" Professor:"Gilligan!" Gilligan:"I knew this was a dumb idea, Professor!" Professor:"Where's the Skipper!?" Gilligan:"Huh!? The Kidnapper got him!" Skipper:"No no no the Skipper has got the kidnapper!" Professor:"Skipper, you got him!" Skipper:"You bet your life I have! Now, let's get him back to camp!" Gilligan:"Yeah! Let's get him back to camp! Skipper!? Professor!? Kidnapper!? Anybody!?"

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Dusty's Trail scene.

Dusty:"Saddle Burn Wells. Pop 114. I wonder how old mom is?" Mr. Callahan:"I wonder where everybody is." Mr. Carter Brookhaven:"Where is everyone!?" Mr. Callahan:"I don't know. Looks to me like we found ourselves a ghost town." Ghost sound. Dusty:"I think one of them is trying to tell us something."

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