Jamanda

Ginger couldn't believe it. She was riding up an elevator of one of the nicest highrise apartment buildings in L.A. with an uncle she didn't know she had. The doors opened on the 32nd floor. She followed the tall detective to Apt. 3218. "Here you go," he said, unlocking the door. "Your new home." Ginger stood aghast. She'd never been in such a nice place before. Everything looked brand new, from the furniture to the paint to the appliances in the kitchen. "Dude," she said. "Are you like, rich or something?" "I get by," said her uncle. "The aparment came with all appliances, furniture, and once a week housekeeping." "Sweetness," said Ginger. "You don't even have to clean?" "Too busy to," said the detective. "Hungry?" "Sure." He heated up a pair of microwave dinners. One thing the apartment didn't come with was food, and he was a lousy cook. But Ginger was too busy looking out the picture-glass window to care about eating salisbury steak and macaroni. After they ate, the detective showed Ginger her room. It sat next to his home office and across from the bathroom. She was free to decorate it however she liked and her first idea was to paint it black, but was having second thoughts about that now. One thing Ginger noticed about the place was that there were a lot of pictures of the same lady, the lady in the pictures in the detective's office. Ginger wondered if it'd be rude to ask, but decided not to. It was getting late and her uncle said something about getting up early. Ginger lay in her bed and wondered about the strange events of the day. She had gone from being a runaway at a party on the bad side of town, to the neice of a mysterious detective in a fancy apartment. "Oh well," she said to herself. "I'll bet it's all a dream anyway."

Lily jerked back into reality when Tommy pulled on her headset. "We're here!" he squealed. "We made it!" Lily groaned and got out of the car, rubbing her backside and Tommy jumped out and ran up to the new house. If you could call it new. It was a somewhat battered old farmhouse with holes in the roof, broken shutters, a front door off its hinges, and paint chipping off at every corner. Okay, it was a VERY battered farmhouse. Tommy squealed, Lucas stared, Lily made a face, Daisy looked at Enos, and Enos just sighed. "This...is where we're supposed to live?" Lily said, clearly disgusted. "Cool!" said Tommy. "Now I know it needs work," said Enos, looking over the house. "But eventually..." Enos didn't want to look at his family. This was the house where he had grown up, and it hadn't been in much better condition then. But it was all he had left in Hazzard County. There was no way a family this size could fit in the boarding house. "Can we go in?" asked Tommy. "Go right ahead," said Enos. To a little boy like Tommy, the house was an adventure. He couldn't wait to look for secret passageways, hidden cubbyholes, and buried treasure. Lucas followed him, mostly to see if the backyard was big enough to practice hitting. Lily sighed and went in to see if the inside was as bad as the outside. "It'll be just fine Enos," said Daisy, stroking her husbands arm. He looked at her and she smiled. "I know it's not much but..." he started. "I think it's wonderful," said Daisy. "We're not too far from the farm or from town. There's plenty of room for the kids. And it's here in Hazzard." "Well," sighed Enos. "It'll take a lot of work." "So will raising twins," said Daisy. Enos grinned. "Wow," said Tommy. "Look at all these rooms! I bet I can have my own room! You think I will Lucas huh huh?" Lucas shrugged and went out on the back porch. He smiled to himself to see the wide space surrounded by woods. One thing they never had in L.A. was a backyard. Lily turned her nose up at the filthy kitchen and the funny smells in the front room. She cringed when she saw cockroaches scurrying across the hallway into the small bathroom. She glanced sideways into three other doorways, each leading into smaller rooms. At the end was the master bedroom, which was fairly large, but also poorly kept. Lily sighed to herself. "Is it too late to go back to L.A.?" she said to no one in particular. "Yep," said Tommy, coming out of the bathroom. "Too late!" "Ugh," Lily said, moving back to the front room. "Don't go outside," said Tommy. "Mommy and Daddy are kissing again. Yuck." "Thanks for the warning," said Lily, brushing some plaster out of her hair that had fallen from the ceiling. That's when she looked up and saw it.

WAIT A MINUTE YOU MEAN COOTERS GONNA BE IN KANSAS CITY!!!!!????? YEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAWWWWW!!!!! Hmmm, I guess ya'll know where we're at now.

With rootbeer, ya gotta try IBC that comes in the glass bottles. More expensive, yes, but great stuff! In college, I had the most conservative roommate in the world (she was in Bible College) and would jokingly scold me for leaving IBC rootbeer bottles around the couch saying, "Amanda? Are you drinking again?" So I would purposely leave my bottles around the couch whenever I watched T.V. If ya can't afford IBC, I'd put A&W next. I know many like Barqs because it has caffeine (sp?).

Lily bobbed her head to the music of her headphones. Lucas was playing with a handheld video game. Tommy was sitting in the middle of the backseat singing at the top of his lungs. "On the road agaaaaain! I can't wait to get on the roooooad agaaaaain!" "You're gonna be off the road if you don't keep it down," their mother snapped from the front seat. "Sorry Mommy," said Tommy. "I'm trying to drown out Lily's music." "Turn your headset down Lily," said their dad. "She's not listening," said Tommy, poking his sister. "Wha?" asked Lily. "Turn it down," said her father. Lily rolled her eyes and turned the music down. The 16 year old could care less about what her father thought. She had wanted to stay in L.A. with her friends and, sigh, Johnathan Braddock. But no. Now that Mom was expecting again, there was no question. Little Tommy was only five and was excited about moving to a small town in Georgia. He loved the stories his father would tell about fast cars, boar hunting, and turkey shoots. He was also anxious to meet his mothers cousins, who were the heros of most of the old stories. Lucas was ten and didn't really mind either way. He'd go anywhere as long as he could play baseball. He liked rooting for the Dodgers, but now he could root for the Braves too. Daisy sighed and rubbed her belly. She was glad to be going home at last. Her husband had promised her that if the family got too big for their suite in L.A., they could go back to Hazzard County, where both of them grew up, met each other, fell in love, and finally married. He had to give in when she told him that she was pregnant again, especially when they found out it was twins. Enos gazed at the mile marker, which showed that they were halfway across Texas. He too, was glad to be going home. The only reason they had stayed in L.A. was because he made more money there. But they had enough savings, and if he won the run for sherriff, he'd be able to support everyone. Besides, there were the other Dukes to help them out as well.

dude, that'd be sweet, but I already have a job! Jam doesn't though...hmmmm. But Dad would think she was crazy and she says she's too introverted.

Ginger sat in the police station scowling at her friends for getting her in trouble. Sure, she'd been in trouble before, but never with the police. Now, they'd been busted when drugs showed up at the party. She had tried to leave, but it was too late. The lady behind the desk called out her name. Ginger got up reluctantly and went up to the desk. They were looking over the forms she had filled out. "You're a long way from home aren't you?" "I ran away last year," said Ginger. "My mother didn't even notice, the old drunk." "I see," said the officer. "And your father?" "What father?" Ginger scowled. "He left when I was four. I bet he's in jail somewhere." "We still have to run a check," said the officer. "His name?" "Rufus I think," said Ginger. "Same last name. Only thing of his I got stuck with." "I see," said the officer. "We'll be running a check on your parents to see if either of them will come get you. In the meantime, you'll have to stay with a foster family." Ginger groaned. She wanted to stay with her friends. She didn't trust adults, as the only ones in her life never seemed to care. So she had run away from Tuscon, hitchhiked to L.A., and met a group of young girls in the back streets. She wanted them to accept her, so she dressed and talked the way they did. She liked the black makeup, black clothes, and heavy metal music, but she didn't like the way her friends had gotten her into trouble. She waited in the station for the police to tell her what to do next. She saw a young officer come out of the elevator and talk to the lady at the desk. They looked over at Ginger. "Come with me please," said the young officer. Ginger shrugged and followed him. The elevator stopped several floors up. She was confused. None of her friends were taken elsewhere in the station. There was even another girl downstairs waiting to go into foster care. Where were they taking her? The officer took her into a front office, where a secretary announced her through a speaker. Someone on the other side said, "Show her in." "Right through there," said the secretary. Ginger looked at the door. It was a detective's office. Were they providing a detective to find her parents? She didn't want to find her parents. She nervously went into the room. It was a nice looking office. The windows showed the Los Angeles skyline all the way to the beach. There were NASCAR posters on the wall along with several maps of L.A. and one of the state of Georgia. On top of the filing cabinet were several framed pictures of the same lady. Ginger looked at the man behind the desk and suddenly wasn't nervous anymore. He was smiling and had to look of someone you couldn't help but trust. "Please, have a seat," he said, gesturing to a cushioned chair in front of the desk. "Um," Ginger mumbled as she sat down. "It seems you were right," said the man, looking away. "Your father is in jail, in Boise Idaho." "Figures," she said. "What about Mom?" "Sorry to say," said the man, looking into her eyes. "She was picked up in Pheonix with a DUI. She's going to be serving two years." "That's Mom," Ginger sighed. "So now," said the man. "We have to decide what to do with you." "I can just go back," said Ginger. "Sorry," said the man. "You're only 17. You have to have a guardian." "I can take care of myself." "The law thinks differently," said the man. "You have two options. You can either go into foster care..." "I'd rather not," said Ginger. "I've heard stories about foster homes." "Probably inaccurate rumors," said the man. "Or you can go into the custody of your closest relative." "I ain't got none," said Ginger. "Mom had no family." "Your mother doesn't," said the man. "But your father does. He has a brother, who at present, would be willing to take you in." "Oh sure," said Ginger. "How you gonna find him?" "Can you read?" "Of course I can read," Ginger snapped. "I ain't dumb." The man simply smiled and pointed to the nameplate on his desk. His last name was the same as hers. "You've got to be kidding me," she said. "Not if your father was Rufus Strate of Hazzard Georgia," said the man. "And your mother was Gloria Cornwallis of Greenbough Alabama." "Which would make you..." "Your uncle," said the man. "Detective Enos Strate. Please to meet you Ginger." (We have to pause here. Amanda needs more nachos and rootbeer. Writers must have nourishment!)

We'll post bios of some of our characters although we haven't posted the stories that introduce them yet! They will be coming shortly. Note: not all of these characters appear in the same stories or necessarily have any relation to each other. Emily Hogg (pronounced like "Emma Lee") is Cletus and Boss's cousin and went to school with the young Dukes. She's a gorgeous blonde with a snooty attitude and does NOT get along with Daisy (or any of the Dukes for that matter). Is all Hogg when it comes to greed and wanting her way. Always had all the boys chasing her in school, except Enos, resulting in her having a huge crush on Enos, who of course, only has eyes for Daisy (the main reason she and Daisy don't get along). <><> Rufus Strate is Enos's older brother and was the schoolyard bully. Would constantly pick on Enos and the Dukes. Became a truck driver and eventually wound up in jail in Boise Idaho. Ginger Strate is Rufus's daughter, who wants nothing to do with him or her mother, who also wound up in jail. Ran away from home at 16 and hitchiked from Tuscon AZ to L.A., where she got into the Goth scene and also a little trouble with the law. <><> The Next Generation (we have more but these are the most developed) Lilian (Lily) Strate is Enos and Daisy's daughter, who grew up in LA but moved to Hazzard at 16. Looks like Daisy, but has Enos's eyes. Thinks her father is too strict. Thomas (Tommy) Strate, is Lily's 10 year old brother. Gets along great with Dad and likes to play cops and robbers. T.J. Davenport, Cooter's son, grew up in Hazzard and is more into motorcycles and dirt bikes than cars. Daisy Mae Duke, is Bo's baby girl and is only two, but is the cutest little thing you ever did see! Has curly blond hair and always giggles and hides her face around strangers.

<Rating: PG. Nothing happens but has intense moments> Daisy looks out the window and scowls. Several other girls stand around her. Girl#1: Wasn't that your boyfriend Daisy? Daisy: I have no boyfriend. Girl#2: (whispers to others) That's not what she said last week. Daisy: I heard that! Girl#3: But that was him wasn't it? Daisy: Oh get back to work! The other girls shrug and go back to waiting on the well-dressed men in the Boar's Nest. Meanwhile, Rosco attempts to talk some sense into Enos in the Hazzard county jail. Rosco: Enos you dipstick! You know Boss wouldn't make Daisy do something like that! Enos: He's done it before Sherriff. Rosco: That's not the point! Now he there ain't no love lost between him and them Dukes, but you know as well I as do that he wouldn't do that to Daisy! Enos: But he doesn't know what's going to happen Sherriff! And it's gonna happen so fast that he ain't gonna be able to save her. Rosco: So you're gonna do it by sittin' in jail? Enos: It's out of my hands now. I did my part. I just hope it's enough to open people's eyes to what's really going on in there. Back at the Boar's Nest, Boss is meeting with two men interested in helping him build a permanent Playpen and trying to explain that the protest is under control. Man#1: So what are you doin' about it? Boss: I've already done something about it! I put the leader of that there protest in jail. Man#2: Good. Who was it? Boss: The local deputy. Man#1: A deputy? I thought it'd be a preacher or... Boss: You don't know our deputy. With his reputation, he oughta be a priest, 'ceptin he ain't Catholic. And it just so happens, that one of the girls working here is his girlfriend. Man#2: Which one? Boss: Daisy, the head-waitress. Man#1: Ahhhh yes. I've had my eye on that one. Don't tell me she's taken... Boss: Well, they did have a fight and all...you know...him not likin' her working here... Man#1: Yes, I suppose he's no trouble if he's in jail...and that girl sure is pretty... Boss: Prettiest girl in Hazzard. Man#1: And those legs... Man#2: Just let us know when you want to build that club Hogg. We'll show that girl the time of her life. Man#1: We certainly will. Back at the jail... Enos: Sherriff? Rosco: What now? Enos: I think you should go back to the Boar's Nest and check on Daisy. Rosco: What? Enos: Please Sherriff!? I think she's in trouble. Rosco: All right, but you're coming with me. Enos: But I'm under arrest Sherriff... Rosco: I know that you dipstick, but I ain't got another deputy so you'll have to do. And if you're right about what's going to happen, I'm gonna need some help. Enos: I'm right behind ya Sherriff. Back at the Boar's Nest... Man#1: Call that girl in here... Boss: Daisy! Daisy: (comes in) You wanted to see me Boss? Boss: Well, rather they did. Man#2: If you'll come with me J.D., we can discuss building plans. Boss: But should we...? The man ushers Boss out of the office and shuts the door, leaving Daisy alone with the first man. Man#1: You are a very lucky girl. Daisy: How's that? Man#1: (advancing) You will be the first to experience the real business. Daisy: You mean...? Man#1: Oh come now honey. Don't tell me you didn't know this was coming? Daisy: (backing away) Now mister, you stay away from me! Rosco and Enos pull up outside the Boar's Nest as Boss rushes out. Boss: Rosco! That lamebrain was right for a change! They really are gonna turn this place into... Rosco: We know Boss, we know! Enos: Where's Daisy!? Boss: In the office with that... Man#1: I do like country girls. Daisy: Enos was right! Oh Enos why didn't I listen to you? Man#1: Your boyfriend can't save you now. Daisy: Wanna bet? Just then, the door is kicked in and Enos bursts in. The man tries to get away, but Enos grabs him and punches him out, as his gun was confiscated when he was arrested. Enos: Nobody, but nobody, messes with my girl and gets away with it! Daisy: Enos! Enos: (turning to her) Are you okay? Daisy: (looking down) I am now. Oh Enos, I'm so sorry. Enos: (pulling her to him) I'm sorry too Daisy. I shouldn'ta yelled at you like that. Daisy: You were right the whole time. Oh Enos... Enos holds her as Rosco comes in and arrests the man on the floor. Rosco: Oh you got him good. Man#1: Groan. Rosco: All right now fella. You are under arrest for attemptin'...well you know what you was attemptin' to do...You have the right to remain silent...(drags him out of the office) Oh Enos...take your time gettin' back. Enos: Thanks Sherriff. Man#1: You mean you'll leave that girl in there with him? Rosco: You don't know Enos fella. Daisy: Can you ever forgive me? Enos: (smiles) I'll forgive you if you forgive me. Daisy: Sounds fair enough. Enos: Look at me Daisy. Daisy: I thought you didn't want to look at me. Enos: (lifts her face) There ain't nothin' wrong with lookin' at a pretty girl's face Daisy. Balladeer: And that's the legend of how the Playpen went bust...again...but Boss didn't seem to mind much. The first fella got seven years for trying to assult Daisy, and the second just disappeared and was never seen again in these parts. The Boar's Nest went back to being the social center it had always been. As for Enos and Daisy (shot of them kissing in the office) well they promised never to fight again (Enos wraps a blanket around Daisy) but you know how that goes (Daisy doesn't want to wear the blanket) and things got back to normal (Enos and Daisy squabbling in the office) in Hazzard County.

awwwww how cute! Snug as a bug in a rug!

Bo and Luke head home to find Daisy talking to Uncle Jesse. Daisy: Oh Uncle Jesse, why would he call me something like that? Jesse: Daisy, he was just upset. I'm sure he didn't mean it. Bo: You feelin' better Daisy? Daisy: A little... Jesse: Well, you just take it easy darlin'... Daisy leaves the room and Bo and Luke sit down. Jesse: You don't think it's true do ya? Bo: What is? Jesse: That if Daisy keeps working there she'll become... Luke: I don't know...but that's what Enos thinks is gonna happen. Bo: And he aims to stop it. Jesse: Stop it? Luke: Don't ask us how he aims to do it, that's just what Cooter told us. Uncle Jesse nods. Bo: I guess Daisy told you what happened? Jesse: From what I could tell...She asked Enos why he wouldn't look at her and he told her why...then she scolded him for being too...you know...and he gave his opinion about her working there...she shot back at him for interferin' in her life too much...then he told her in not so polite terms...well...what he thought was going to happen I guess...and...Did she really slap him? Luke: That's what Cooter said. He saw the whole thing through the window. Jesse: She just doesn't see it. Bo: See what? Jesse: That girl is so dang determined to live her own life on her own terms that she doesn't even see it when it's been here for going on seven years now... Luke: What has? Jesse: Gah, you two wouldn't know it if it sat on you. Bo: Know what? Jesse: Why he doesn't just marry that girl is beyond me. Luke: You know what he's talking about? Bo: Nope. Jesse: Course you wouldn't. You two have never been in love. Jesse leaves the room and Bo and Luke look at each other. Bo: What's love got to do with it? Luke: Search me. (author's note: You go Tina Turner!) Balladeer: Well, after a week of Enos not coming in to the Boar's Nest, and Daisy pretending she didn't miss him, Thursday night arrives with a little more company. A large group of people are gathered at the Boar's Nest with signs. Boss and Rosco and Enos show up. Boss: What is all this!? Lady#1: We're protestin'! Boss: Protesting! Man#1: You've gone too far this time! Lady#2: We ain't gonna stand by and let you trick our girls into leadin' a life of sin! Boss: I don't know what you're talking about! Rosco: Neither do I, but I do know that you gotta have a permit to protest here! Man#2: How are we supposed to get a permit when we'd have to have it approved by the very man we're prostesting against? Rosco: That ain't my concern. All I know is, the law specifically states that if there is no permit for a protest then... Enos: Then the leader of said protest goes to jail. Rosco: Uh, right. Boss: There, there! You see! All right! Who's the leader of this here protest?! No one says anything. Rosco: Not talkin' eh? All right Enos, arrest 'em all! Enos: Can't do that Sherriff. Law says we can only arrest the one in charge. Rosco: Then find out who's in charge and arrest him you dipstick! Enos: Can't really do that either Sherriff. Rosco: Why not? Enos: Because a lawman can't arrest himself. Rosco: What? Enos: (handing Rosco the handcuffs) You have to do it Sherriff. I organized the protest without a permit. Boss: You heard him knucklehead! Arrest him! To think, your own deputy conspiring against me! Enos: It's for your own good Mr. Hogg. I ain't gonna stand by and let you do this. Rosco: Enos! Do you really think that...? Boss: Will you just arrest him peabrain! Rosco: All right already. Come on Enos. Rosco takes Enos away, but the crowd remains as the well-dressed men go into the Boar's Nest. Daisy watches from the window. Balladeer: I don't think she knows what she's got. Do you?

Cooter stares across the street as Daisy rushes out of the station. Cooter: I didn't just see that. The General drives up just as Daisy is driving off in her Jeep. Cooter runs over to the Duke boys. Cooter: Ya'll better go after her before she does something crazy! Bo: What happened!? Cooter: I'll explain later! Ya'll git after her and I'll check on Enos! Bo and Luke look at each other and then take off after the Jeep. Luke: (into the CB) Daisy! Are you all right? Daisy: Leave me alone! Bo: No way. Not with her driving like that! Luke: Daisy, I don't know what's going on, but you're going to get hurt...Why don't you just pull over and calm down for a while and...and we won't ask any more questions. Daisy hesitates a minute and then pulls the Jeep off to the side. The General pulls in behind her. Bo: Whew...that was close. Should we check on her? Luke: We'll just sit here a minute. When she wants to talk, she will, but right now...no questions. Meanwhile, Cooter enters the Sherriff's station and sees Enos sitting behind the booking desk. Cooter: Uh...Enos? You okay? Enos shakes his head. He's breathing heavily and Cooter sees that half of his face is bright red where Daisy slapped him. Cooter: I don't suppose you want to talk about it. Enos: (sighs) I knew this would happen. Cooter: What? Enos: She hates me. Cooter: Uhm... Enos: (getting up) She just doesn't understand! It's just going to get worse and I know it is and I'm the only one who sees it coming and they just don't know that it's going to happen and they're all just too dang blind to see it! Cooter: See what? Enos: (glares at him) And you're as dumb as they are! Cooter is taken aback with surprise and anger. Cooter: Well excuse me for not being as brilliant as you are ya big shot city cop! Enos: (sighs) I'm sorry Cooter. I shouldn'ta said that. Cooter: Just like you shouldn'ta said whatever it was you said to Daisy? Enos: (touches his face and cringes) She had to know...but I shouldn'ta told her like that...but I was just too angry...She thinks I'm only mad cuz I'm jealous...She said I was interferin' in her life and that I needed to butt out...But she just don't know what kind of danger she's in... Cooter: (surprised) Danger?! Enos: It'll get worse...them fellas in there don't touch her now...but they will...and before she knows it... Enos sits down again and Cooter realizes what he's talking about. Cooter: But ol' Boss...he wouldn't... Enos: (shakes his head) I don't think he realizes what he's starting with this thing...but I seen him talking to some of them fellas that go in there...they want to help him open a whole club...and you can bet the farm that they know what it's going to turn into. Cooter: And Daisy'll... Enos:(shakes head) I can't let that happen. (gets up) I gotta stop it. If she won't listen to me, then I'll just have to put a stop to the whole dang thing. Cooter: I'm with ya there but...how? Meanwhile, back on the road out of town... Daisy (over cb): Bo? Luke? Luke: Yeah Daisy? We're listening. Daisy: I'm going home. Luke: We're right behind you. The cousins drive back to the farm. Daisy still doesn't seem to be in any mood to talk as she goes into her room. Bo: I guess we're getting our own lunch. Luke: I wonder if Cooter had any luck? CB: Breaker one, breaker one, might be crazy but I ain't dumb, Crazy Cooter comin' atcha, any'all Lost Sheep home on the Hazzardnet come on? Bo: (picks up cb) Right here Crazy C. Cooter: How's Daisy? Bo: Well, she's home and safe but not saying a word. How 'bout you? Cooter: He's up to something...but can't talk about that now. You just keep an eye on the pretty cousin all right? Bo: Uh, sure thing. Cooter: I'm over and gone. Luke: Up to something? Bo: What could Enos possibly be up to? And what is this all about? Luke: I guess Cooter doesn't want to say over the cb, but it sure looks like he knows more than we do. Bo: Well, lets just get over there and ask him. Luke: Let's wait for Uncle Jesse to get back. I don't want to leave her here alone. Besides, he might be able to get Daisy to talk about it. Later, the boys are at Cooters and he fills them in on what he saw. Bo: She slapped him? What'd he say? Cooter: Wouldn't tell me, but I'm telling ya, it wasn't nothing good. That boy ain't in his right mind. Bo: I'll say. Daisy's madder than a barnful of hornets. Luke: With all stingers pointing right at Enos...but what I don't understand is why he'd say something like that? Cooter: Like I said, he ain't in his right mind. He's afraid something's gonna happen to Daisy if she keeps workin' at that Playpen. Bo: Well shoot, ain't nothing gonna happen to her. She told us that she and the other girls are only there to look at. Cooter: Well, ol' Enos thinks otherwise. Seems to think the whole operation is gonna go downhill in a direction ain't none of us wanna see it goin'. Luke: And take Daisy right with it. Cooter: Exactly. Bo: W-wait a minute...you mean Enos thinks that Daisy's gonna...? Luke: Wind up like one of the Mabel's RV girls? Bo looks stunned, Luke nods, and Cooter shakes his head. Cooter: Well, that's what he thinks might happen... Bo: Well it ain't is it Luke? Luke: I don't know...I sure hope not. Bo: Well, what are we gonna do? Cooter: Oh don't you worry. Ol' Enos isn't going to just sit by and watch this happen to his girl, angry or not. Luke: And what's he gonna do? Daisy ain't gonna listen to him. Cooter: Oh he's not just trying to get Daisy out. He aims to shut down the whole operation. Bo: (laughs) And just how does he plan to do that? Cooter: I have no idea. That's just what he said when Rosco showed up. Didn't seem to want to go into detail in front of the sherriff. Bo: You don't think it's somethin' illegal do ya? Luke: (laughs) Enos? Do something illegal? Cooter: I dunno. I didn't think he'd ever say something so bad that Daisy'd slap him either. Luke: Yeah but... Cooter: Like I said...that boy ain't in his right mind. Balladeer: Well I wouldn't be either if a pretty thing like Daisy slapped me like that.

A fan-fiction Jam and I made up and thought was good enough to post here. Tonight on the Dukes: Boss Hogg's Playpen of Pretty Piggies is back, but not without opposition. When citizens of Hazzard County stage a protest, everyone is shocked to find out how far a man will go to protect not only his community, but the very love of his life. Bo and Luke are in the Boar's Nest and Daisy comes over to serve them. Bo: Hey, when do you get off? Daisy: Late. Boss wants me to help him with the Pretty Piggies audition. Luke: The Pretty Piggies are back? Daisy: Yeah, and this time it's legit, or so he says. Instead of having a whole center for it, he's going to turn the Boar's Nest into a Playpen one night a week. Then, if it brings in enough money, he'll build a new club for it. Bo: Well, as long as it's legit. I wouldn't mind seeing Bessie Lou in one of those outfits. Luke: Nah, she's too skinny. Now Ruth Ann on the other hand... The next day, Enos is over at Cooter's to pick up Rosco's car. Cooter: Did you hear about the Boar's Next becoming a playpen on Thursday nights? Enos: Yeah, I heard Mr. Hogg talking to Sherriff Rosco about it. Cooter: You don't seem too keen about it. Enos: Well I'm not. Cooter: Don't tell me you don't want to see Daisy in that cute little piggy outfit. Enos: (turns red) It just ain't right Cooter. There oughta be a law. Cooter: What's so bad about it? Enos: Cooter, you don't know what goes on in places like that. I saw them in California and...I don't know...I just don't like the idea of Daisy working in a place like that. Cooter: Well this ain't California Enos. You know things are different here. Enos: (sighs) I know. And I sure hope I'm wrong. But I still don't like it. Not one bit. Balladeer: Well, it's Thursday night and nearly everyone in Hazzard County is out at the Boar's Nest for the opening of Playpen Night. At least, every male in Hazzard county. And some from elsewhere. Bo, Luke, and Cooter stand outside the Boar's Nest and watch some well-dressed men go in. Bo: I don't believe this! Twenty bucks just to get in? Luke: Who in Hazzard has that kind of money? Cooter: Well, a lot of them do, but I don't think they're from Hazzard County. Luke: Looks like Boss's been getting the word out. Bo: I wonder if Daisy could get us in? Luke: I doubt we'd last long. With the way them fellas are dressed, we'd stick out like peacocks at a turkey shoot. Bo: Speaking of turkeys... Rosco and Enos pull up. Rosco goes to the door, shows his badge, and gets in without paying. Enos pauses by the other guys first. Bo: Hey, don't you guys have to pay? Enos: No. We're just supposed to go in to inspect security. Rosco: (pokes head out the door) Enos! Will you come on? Enos: (sighs) I still don't like it. (goes in) Bo: Well don't that beat all? He doesn't have to pay to get in there with all them pretty girls, and he doesn't even seem happy about it. Cooter: Well he ain't. Said something about things that ain't right and all that. Luke: Well, Enos never was that easy to understand. Come on, let's go. The next morning, the cousins go outside for their morning chores. Luke: So what was it like in there? Bo: Too fancy for poor folks like us to understand? Daisy: Mostly just a bunch of old fellas in suits, sitting around and ordering drinks, ogling over us...you know. Luke: Seems pretty tame to me. I wonder why it's $20? Daisy: Well, Boss said something about the "real" business not picking up yet. Whatever that means. Luke: "Real" business? You don't think he'll have you girls...? Daisy: Don't be ridiculous! It's nothing like that! We're just there to look at. Uncle Jesse: (coming out of the house) And it better stay that way! Daisy: Oh for pete's sake! You're as bad as Enos! Bo: What'd he do? Daisy: He wouldn't even look at me the whole time! Then as they were leaving, I heard him ask Rosco to give him something else to do on Thursday nights. He didn't even want to come back in. Luke: Well, you know how Enos is. Daisy: Maybe so, but he wouldn't talk to me either. Uncle Jesse: Now don't get your feathers ruffled over nothing Daisy. Just talk to him and let him know that...that there isn't anything to worry about. Daisy: Well...okay Uncle Jesse. Daisy leaves later to find Enos and Bo and Luke continue doing chores. After a while, a message comes in over the CB. CB: Breaker one, breaker one, might be crazy but I ain't dumb, Crazy Cooter comin' atcha, any ya'll Lost Sheep home on the Hazzard Net come on? Luke: Luke Duke here Crazy C. What's up? Cooter: Ya'll better get over here quick! There's show goin' on across the street and it ain't pretty! Luke: We're on our way! Bo: What do you suppose is going on? LUke: I don't know, but it don't sound good. Meanwhile, Cooter is looking across the street at the Hazzard Sherriff's sation. Through the window, he sees Enos and Daisy yelling at each other. Suddenly, Daisy slaps Enos across the face. Balladeer: I don't know about you, but I'd sure like to know what ol' Enos did to get that!

I (Amanda) agree that at first, the Cival War was not about slavery...at first. These are the facts as I remember them from my American History class in college. The Southern States wanted to succeed from the Union and become their own country, since their culture and economy was so vastly different anyway. The North however, wanted the country to stay together the way it was. Hence, the war began. The South was doing well, as they had fine generals, the battles were on their land, and they had a better cause, independence. President Lincoln, in a brilliant strategic move, changed the cause of the war with the Emancipation Proclamation, which freed all slaves in the Union. Now that slavery was the issue, and not independence, the North had the stronger cause. That, along with other advantages, enabled them to win the war. As I see it from history, the Confederate flag was never a sign of slavery, but of independence, as the Confederate States of America.

don't forget to add: OR ELSE! Or else what? I believe Boss knew, as he certainly looked threatened.

In the second episode where Enos is gone, the balladeer mentions that he's being "separated from his appendix" which I believe was what was happening in real life as well.

Hey ya'll. Here's a question for ya. Who are your favorite bad guys from Dukes? There were all kinds of them. Funny (Squirt and Bubba), Ugly (Jethro Brothers), Dumb (Laurel and Hardy), and downright scary (that big ol' doberman dog!). Besides the recurring antics of Boss and Rosco, who were worthy advasaries of the Duke boys?

Lester Crabb: Enos. How would you like to go pinch Daisy Duke? Enos: Pinch Daisy? I couldn't do that Sherriff. It wouldn't be polite, especially when I'm on duty. Later... Enos: Pinch Daisy? Well, maybe a little pinch wouldn't hurt. Naughty naughty Enos! Balladeer: You may have heard of Murphy's Law. Well in Hazzard, there's Enos's Law (Enos crashes into Cooter) in which if anything goes wrong, he's usually somewhere in the middle of it. But then their's Daisy's Law (Daisy chases bad guys in place of Cooter) which can usually be counted on to veto Enos's Law. Bo: This guy Murphy, was he a race car driver? Luke: Gotta be. Everybody talks about him. Luke: I hope you like eggs Bo: What do eggs have to do with anything? (driving through a barn) Luke: Where there's chickens...there's eggs. Bo: That sure is a funny place to put a barn. Luke: Pull that fool stunt again and I'll find a funnier place to put one.

Since Lulu doesn't have much on her forum, we'll start a quotes thread for her. Boss: Now don't get upset. Lulu: I WANT THAT CAR! Boss: She's getting upset. Lulu: J.D.! Don't you go sending my baby brother on a suicide mission! I had you make him sherriff so he'd have a safe job! I'm sure there's more out there, but we need to see some later seasons with more Lulu appearances.

The kids were at it again. Last week they were playing a Weird Al Yankovich CD with the song "I Bought it on E-Bay" and I heard a lyric mention "a Dukes of Hazzard ashtray." You can't get away from Dukes anywhere can you?

Okay, still another question. What does Enos wear to the wedding in "Enos and Daisy's Wedding" ? Jam insists that he wears a tux but Amanda remembers him wearing a uniform. If we keep arguing like this we'll actually have to get separate screen names (sarcasm detected) Could someone settle this for us?

I'll admit, they didn't have any trouble in "Find Lorretta Lynn" as Rosco's car was missing the back and Enos's was missing the front.

Rosco: (Boss on his hood) Kew, you look like a little fat hood ornament...oooh, that musta smarted. Bo: Hey, you gotta dollar. Cooter: That's a five. Bo: Well five'll do. We might need gas. Rosco: They took my keys and your car! What'd you leave your keys in your car for? Enos: You left 'em in yours, Sherriff. Rosco: DON'T TRY TO BLAME ME!!! Balladeer: When Daisy found out about her car, well, she took it in stride...(as Daisy chases Bo and Luke with a frying pan) Balladeer: It was good plan. And it didn't work worth a pitcher of spit!

Don't leave us hangin' Waylon...which episode was it????

Does Enos ever call Rosco by his first name? It always seems like he calls him Sherriff. And he calls Boss Mr. Hogg. Just wondering if he ever calls them by their first names.