Dukes of Hazzard Paraphrasing/Inaccurate Quotes

[Skipper Duke]

Season 1 The Big Heist.

Luke is developing a plan to get Boss Hogg in trouble for unpaid moonshine taxes.

Uncle Jesse:"What're you thinkin' Luke?"

Luke:"I'm thinkin' we could really have some fun if you called in old Harvey Essex on this one."

Uncle Jesse:"Harvey Essex? Since when did we have anything to do with revenuers?"

Luke:"Yeah!" Uncle Jesse catches the drift and winks with Luke.

[Skipper Duke]

Season 3 The Legacy

Deputy Wilbur Fudge:"Boss, this is Wilbur. Them beeps are beginning to sound like the bell on my typewriter. Whatcha want me to do?"

Boss Hogg:"Don't do anything you dipstick! Until me an' the other dipstick catch up with you, you hear!?"

Wilbur Fudge:"Oh. Thanks Boss."

[Skipper Duke]

Season 3 The Legacy

Bo:"Luke, you ain't never gonna believe who's behind us. Remember that guy who used wonder around town with a calculator all the time?"

Luke:"Wilbur. The county controller."

Bo:"That's him back there."

Luke:"If there is anything in that mine, I don't want them 2 lookin' over our shoulder when we find it. Lose 'em alright!"

Bo:"Alright. Ha ha Wilbur."

Luke:"I thought you were gonna lose 'em!?"

Bo:"Luke, if there's 1 thing I can't stand, it's a side seat driver! Now I'm gonna lose 'em, soon as I pass by the old sawmill. Alright!?"

Luke (Gestures ok.)

Bo:"Thank you!"

[Skipper Duke]

Season 7 Happy Birthday General Lee. The bad guy Rick and his girlfriend Ginny find the Dukes during the road race. They want the '69 Charger back. Because their stolen gold dust is hidden in it.

Ginny:"It looks like some kind of road race goin' on."

Rick:"Yer right. I bet this is where those cousins were headin'."

Ginny:"There they are!"

Rick:"They ain't gettin' away this time!"

Luke:"Bo."

Bo:"Luke. This just ain't our day."

Rick:"Pull over cousins, or yer dead!" (Has gun on them.)

Luke:"Alright. You got us. We'll pull right over." (Softly to Bo.)"Hit it."

Bo:"What?"

Luke:"Go!"

[Skipper Duke]

I love this scene. Season 7 Happy Birthday General Lee. when at the startin' line Boss an' Rosco meet the Dukes car.

Boss:"What the devil is here thing!?"

Luke:"Boss. Rosco. Meet the General Lee."

Boss:"Oh. It's the General Lee!"

Rosco:"General Lee."

Boss:"Well, it sure is the ugliest color I ever did see!" 

Rosco:"Yeah! Ugly, ugly, ugly!"

Bo:"Ugly huh? Well, about the only thing yer gonna see of this car when the race starts, is the tail end spittin' dust back at you!"