Dukes of Hazzard Paraphrasing/Inaccurate Quotes

[Skipper Duke]

Season 7 Cale Yarborough Comes to Hazzard 

Eddie:"Why are we runnin' from these clowns? Pull over."

Elmo:"My pleasure."

[Skipper Duke]

Season 2 The Ghost of General Lee

Phil:"Ernie, they're comin' after us."

Ernie:"Cops?"

Phil:"No. The whole blame town."

[Skipper Duke]

Season 5 Daisy's Shotgun Wedding 

(The Beaudries run the Dukes off the road.)

Luke:"Ya dang road hogs!"

[Skipper Duke]

Season 4 Trouble at Cooter's 

Cooter Davenport:"Hey!"

Bonnie Lane:"Hey!"

Cooter Davenport:"What do you got here?"

Bonnie Lane:"Well, I brought us a picnic lunch. Are you interested?"

Cooter Davenport:"Well, now, Miss Bonnie, I'm interested. But I gotta work!"

Bonnie Lane:"I don't know about that Cooter. I got some Fried Chicken, I got some Potato Salad, I got some Corn Bread. Guess what I got fer dessert?"

Cooter Davenport:"What?"

Bonnie Lane:"BlackBerry Cobbler."

Cooter Davenport:"You know somethin' Miss Bonnie?"

Bonnie Lane:"What?"

Cooter Davenport:"You sure got a way with words. Come on here!"

Waylon Jennings:"Ain't amazing how a pretty girl with Fried Chicken could make a man forget about a carburetor float valve? Don't you just hate men that use women to mess up other men? Well, that carburetor float valve is somethin' that ol' Bo an' Luke could sure use on the General right about now."

[Skipper Duke]

(Season 2 Find Loretta Lynn)

Waylon Jennings:"I don't believe I would try to stop that with my body. You know, they don't learn to quick, do they?" 😂

[Skipper Duke]

Season 5 A Little Game of Pool

Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane:(Driving the General Lee after Boss Hogg crookedly won him in a game of pool against Uncle Jesse Duke.)"There's a house trailer! Git that house trailer outta there! Git! Ooh there's a dip! We'll see if we can fly!" 😂 Rosco takes the house trailer's roof off.

Waylon Jennings:"I guess it's all in havin' the right touch." 😂 

Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane:"Well, he won't have to worry about air-conditioning in that house trailer anyway!" 😂

[Skipper Duke]

Season 3 By-Line, Daisy Duke. Bo and Luke are chasing Boss Hogg's tractor thieves Vic and Corey. Cletus is chasing Dukes.

Vic:"Looks like our company's got company." 😂 

Corey:"I got his. I thought those cops was rootin' fer us." 😂 

Vic:"No. Just the Sheriff hisself." 😂 

Vic:"Well, let's not stick around, an' explain to his helpin'." 😂 

Corey:"Rattle some slack boy!" 😂

[Skipper Duke]

Season 7 Happy Birthday General Lee. Rosco chases the Dukes in the end. After the flashbacks are over and it's back to present day.

Luke:(To Bo. About Rosco.)"He might drive better. But he ain't no smarter." 😂

[Skipper Duke]

Season 5 Coy Meets Girl. 

Coy and Vance with Boss Hogg and Sheriff Rosco in hot pursuit. They're driving through national guard military war maneuvers, artillery shell fire. 

Rosco:"I knew those Duke Boys were tuff, but I didn't think they'd go this far!" 😂

Rosco drives in a hole. 😂

Boss:"Look what you done! We went in the hole!" 😂 Rosco gets out. Boss can't get his own door open. It's stuck. Rosco walks over the hood to the passenger side to the back door to get Flash.

Boss:"I can't get my door open! It's stuck!

Not that many mutt! Save me! I'm your leader ain't I!?" 😂

Artillery fire continues around them. They find another hole to hide in.

Boss:"Rosco, so help you, if that car gets hit, you're gonna pay for it!" (KABOOM) They duck down. The car was hit.

Rosco:"That must've been one of those 55 Pack Hausers! Done scuffed my vehicle beyond repair! Do you think I can make time payments?" 😂 

Boss:"You should only live that long!" 😂

Uncle Jesse shows up in his White Ford F Series truck.

Rosco:"There's Jesse!"

Boss:"Oh Jesse!"

Jesse:"You boys better get in here, before you're blown into the next 4TH of July!" 😂

[Skipper Duke]

Season 4 Double Dukes.

Luke Duke:"I can't see where the heck I'm goin'! Hang on!" The Dukes are driving with a smoke bomb that the bad guys Turk and Moody threw in the General Lee.

Waylon Jennings:"Friends an' neighbors, I don't think that jump was planned." 😂(Freezes for commercial.)

(Returns from commercial.)

Luke Duke:"We're airborne!" 😂

[Skipper Duke]

Season 4 Double Dukes

Bo Duke (In the backseat, looking around for the smoke bomb. He finally found it.):"I found it!"

Luke Duke:"Well, get rid of it!" 😂

[Skipper Duke]

Season 2 Officer Daisy Duke. Boss Hogg gets a parking ticket from Daisy Duke who's Hazzard County Deputy after getting fired from the Boars Nest and applying with the Hazzard County Sheriff's Department after passing her written and physical examinations. Boss explain that he didn't park the car his driver did he went to lunch.

Daisy:"Well, well, well. A ticket to my very favorite person. Boss You should know it's illegal to park in a red zone." 😂 

Boss:"Look, I didn't park this car here. My driver did, before he went to lunch! Now outta my way!" 😂 

Daisy:"You wouldn't wanna interfere with the law would you?" 😂 

Boss:"Daisy Duke, I'm warnin' you-" 😂 

Daisy:"Or threatenin' a police officer!" 😂 

Boss:"Alright, alright, alright. Maybe I was a little hasty. Look, why don't you take this $10 and go buy yourself somethin' you've always wanted, an' we'll call it even." 😂 

Daisy:"Bribing an officer. That's really gonna up yer tab!" 😂 (Writes out the ticket. Gives it to him.)"Have a good day Boss!" 😂 

Boss (After she leaves, tries to tear up the ticket.):"This is what I think of yer ticket too! Here! Ya see that!? Ya see!? Ya see-?" (He accidentally tore up the $10 Bill instead of the parking ticket. Realizing what he done.)"Aaah!" 😂