Nothing In Hazzard(Seinfeld/Dukes Crossover)

[Julieduke]

Julie: Well' date=' I just want to know.

Cooter: So Brian, how long haved you lived in the Big Apple?

cue Julieduke[/quote']

Brian says "My whole life, I got to admit the traffice was starting to get to me? This peaceful you can hear yourself think here. In New York City, all you hear is car horns there."

cue Bo's Crush

[Julieduke]

Brian says "My whole life, I got to admit the traffice was starting to get to me? This peaceful you can hear yourself think here. In New York City, all you hear is car horns there."

cue Bo's Crush

Just then Julie hears Bo hit the dixie horn and Brian turned around and seen the best looking car he had ever seen before.

Julie says "You was saying Brian it's peaceful hear and you can hear yourself think and wait a minute I think there stopping for gas."

Cue Bo's Crush

[Bo's Crush]

Brian: Wow! Who owns that car?

Cooter: Bo and Luke Duke, They're Julie's Brother and Cousin.

Bo: Hey, Cooter. Hey Sis, Cooter we need you to tune up the General.

Luke: Hey y'all, Rosco still handing out tickets.

Bo: Yeah, he was trying to give us one on the way in.

cue Julieduke

[Julieduke]

Brian: Wow! Who owns that car?

Cooter: Bo and Luke Duke' date=' They're Julie's Brother and Cousin.

Bo: Hey, Cooter. Hey Sis, Cooter we need you to tune up the General.

Luke: Hey y'all, Rosco still handing out tickets.

Bo: Yeah, he was trying to give us one on the way in.

cue Julieduke[/quote']

Julie says "Yeah, I got one for impeding traffic but there was no traffic and wait till you see Brian's car in the garage it's a 1957 Chevy Bel-Air and it's Green/White two-tone."

Brian says "Oh that old thing, it's just my pride and joy that's all."

Cue Bo's Crush

[Julieduke]

Julie says "Yeah, I got one for impeding traffic but there was no traffic and wait till you see Brian's car in the garage it's a 1957 Chevy Bel-Air and it's Green/White two-tone."

Brian says "Oh that old thing, it's just my pride and joy that's all."

Cue Bo's Crush

Julie says "Well it's some pride and joy you got there and besides whats wrong with your. Remember you had brought it in your dad's garage for some reasons or another what the reason."

Just then it's seemed like out of the blue that another car with New York plates came by and there was talk inside the car as well.

Kramer says "Wow, that's some car they didn't even use their doors just came out the windows. Hey that's Brian what's he doing here and and who's the babe he's talking to maybe I should go and talk to her."

Jerry says "Okay, Kramer aren't you forgetting something I'm going to talk to her first not you besides she wouldn't fall for somebody like you. I'm better looking right now."

George says "Wow, you are both wrong it's me she going to fall for and neither of you."

Elaine says "Wow, there is two good looking guys around that orange car I wouldn't mind talking to either one of them."

Cue Bo's Crush

[Bo's Crush]

Brian: Oh, Look there is everybody else, they seem fasinated by your car guys and you too, Julie.

Cooter: That not a surpise.

cue Julieduke

[Julieduke]

Brian: Oh' date=' Look there is everybody else, they seem fasinated by your car guys and you too, Julie.

Cooter: That not a surpise.

cue Julieduke[/quote']

Julie says "Hey don't be rude why don't you just ask about the car or me which is it?"

Jerry says "First of all, whoever was driving that car cut me off eariler and that was rude and why is it painted orange and all the get up."

Kramer says "And don't forget that Sheriff stopped you for speeding who you was Jerry."

Jerry says "Did you have to tell him how fast I was going now, the broken thing story would've worked just fine Kramer and who are you Angel."

Elaine says "Oh hey Brian, we have nothing to say to each other what you wanted was unreasonable!"

Brian says "All I wanted for us was to have a baby that was too much for you, What was you afriad you was going to mess up your figure."

Cue Bo's Crush

[Bo's Crush]

Elaine: My Figure, ha, your the one who started arguing.

Julie: Who Me?

Jerry: Yeah, your the only girl around I see.

Luke: Now Bo, don't get all crazy ok

Bo: Ok.

Cooter: So, your Jerry Seinfield, Nice to meet you Cooter Davenport at your service, that there is Julie,Bo, and Luke Duke, they're cousins.

cue Julieduke

[Julieduke]

Elaine: My Figure' date=' ha, your the one who started arguing.

Julie: Who Me?

Jerry: Yeah, your the only girl around I see.

Luke: Now Bo, don't get all crazy ok

Bo: Ok.

Cooter: So, your Jerry Seinfield, Nice to meet you Cooter Davenport at your service, that there is Julie,Bo, and Luke Duke, they're cousins.

cue Julieduke[/quote']

Julie says "Kramer, are you working for Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane by what you do to your friend that was pretty good but you know Jerry if that really wasn't working and he didn't know for sure how fast you was going you might be able to get out of the ticket legally."

Brian says "Would that work Julie, I mean really work around here?"

Jerry says "I think I might give that try besides I do think Kramer is working for the Sheriff and it was nice meeting all of you as well. Anybody know a good place to eat and a get a beer as well and meet people as well."

Julie says "Well there's the Boars Nest now the Beer is good, but bring some tums when it comes to the food and the people are great."

Cue Bo's Crush

[Julieduke]

Julie says "Kramer, are you working for Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane by what you do to your friend that was pretty good but you know Jerry if that really wasn't working and he didn't know for sure how fast you was going you might be able to get out of the ticket legally."

Brian says "Would that work Julie, I mean really work around here?"

Jerry says "I think I might give that try besides I do think Kramer is working for the Sheriff and it was nice meeting all of you as well. Anybody know a good place to eat and a get a beer as well and meet people as well."

Julie says "Well there's the Boars Nest now the Beer is good, but bring some tums when it comes to the food and the people are great."

Cue Bo's Crush

Julie says "Listen Elaine, I no girl haven't been for a very long time now and I have a daughter that's a college freshman at University of North Carolina and she plays for the Lady Tarheels perhaps you heard of her "Ms. Angelena Duke" one of the best forwards they got on the team."

Kramer says "That's your daughter, she's the cutest one on the team well I don't Jerry noticed her when we watched the game on tv. He was watching the Tarheels Cheerleaders and he didn't even notice they had won."

Jerry says "Who was they playing Kramer anyways oh I didn't make that connection when they annonced the starting line-up. And I was watching the games thank very much that was you that couldn't keep his eyes off the cheerleaders not me."

Julie says "I'm glad you like her playing but she's way too young for any of you and besides she has a friend but she doesn't like me interfering in her love life. She keeps telling with Basketball practice and classes and homework she way to busy for dating and parties."

Brian says "Well, one thing that is for sure she is very serious about what she is doing in college at least she isn't majoring in parties and beer."

Julie says "Well her college scholarship is very strict she has to keep her gpa up to a certain level and she made the dean's list."

Bo says "Ya, but you had a very busy college experience as well the first year you was pregant and then Angelena came and you had to mother her and keep with your studies at Ohio State University as well. "

Julie says "But I made it through, and went to that other school in Virginia and became a C.S.I. for Atlanta and damm good I might add as well."

Kramer says "What does C.S.I. stand for Julie I don't know what exactly that is myself and are a cop or is that something different?"

Julie says "First of all C.S.I. Stands for Crime Scene Investigation and yes I'm cop for Atlanta and we are the ones that see what happened and who, and why very hard job as well."

Cue Bo's Crush

[Julieduke]

Julie says "Listen Elaine, I no girl haven't been for a very long time now and I have a daughter that's a college freshman at University of North Carolina and she plays for the Lady Tarheels perhaps you heard of her "Ms. Angelena Duke" one of the best forwards they got on the team."

Kramer says "That's your daughter, she's the cutest one on the team well I don't Jerry noticed her when we watched the game on tv. He was watching the Tarheels Cheerleaders and he didn't even notice they had won."

Jerry says "Who was they playing Kramer anyways oh I didn't make that connection when they annonced the starting line-up. And I was watching the games thank very much that was you that couldn't keep his eyes off the cheerleaders not me."

Julie says "I'm glad you like her playing but she's way too young for any of you and besides she has a friend but she doesn't like me interfering in her love life. She keeps telling with Basketball practice and classes and homework she way to busy for dating and parties."

Brian says "Well, one thing that is for sure she is very serious about what she is doing in college at least she isn't majoring in parties and beer."

Julie says "Well her college scholarship is very strict she has to keep her gpa up to a certain level and she made the dean's list."

Bo says "Ya, but you had a very busy college experience as well the first year you was pregant and then Angelena came and you had to mother her and keep with your studies at Ohio State University as well. "

Julie says "But I made it through, and went to that other school in Virginia and became a C.S.I. for Atlanta and damm good I might add as well."

Kramer says "What does C.S.I. stand for Julie I don't know what exactly that is myself and are a cop or is that something different?"

Julie says "First of all C.S.I. Stands for Crime Scene Investigation and yes I'm cop for Atlanta and we are the ones that see what happened and who, and why very hard job as well."

Cue Bo's Crush

Elaine says "Well being pregant and going to college at the sametime doesn't usaully mix that well you could've done something about it and then college would've been a whole lot easier for ya Julie."

Julie says "Hey, you act like I got pregant on purpose or something, and I never once consider abortion or giving my baby for adoption those are the easy way out. And that is very painful subject for me well if it wasn't for my daughter I probaly would've just given up on college and never got to where I'm at now. She is proud of everything that I'm doing today and I love my daughter will all my heart as well."

Elaine looks at Julie and says "What happened that was painful then, if I might ask about it?"

Julie says "I don't want to tell you, and once you have a baby and you know that everything is going againist you well it just makes you want to excel at whatever your doing. Why don't you try having a baby you'll see what I mean, do you have any kids Elaine or ever been pregant?"

Cooter says "I wish you would leave her alone Elaine if you knew what happened to her before she went to college you would understand why she tends to fly off the handle, why did you have to ask her what happened. Now she isn't going to tell you about it all she just thinks your nosy."

Cue Bo's Crush

[Bo's Crush]

Elaine: Well I'm sorry Julie.

Jerry: Yeah, you all should come over to that hotel ,I think Boss Hogg wants him to do a stand up?

Elaine: A stand up? Where?

Julie: Oh probably over at the Boars Nest.

Bo: yeah, that's where Boss has his celebrity speed traps.

Brain: Celebrity speed trap?

cue Julieduke

[Julieduke]

Elaine: Well I'm sorry Julie.

Jerry: Yeah' date=' you all should come over to that hotel ,I think Boss Hogg wants him to do a stand up?

Elaine: A stand up? Where?

Julie: Oh probably over at the Boars Nest.

Bo: yeah, that's where Boss has his celebrity speed traps.

Brain: Celebrity speed trap?

cue Julieduke[/quote']

Julie says "Oh it's simple here really and since the Sheriff ain't listening over here first he gets some celebrity mostly singers and he gets them on speeding. And then the Sheriff and Boss tells him or her for a performance that the Sheriff will tear up their ticket."

Brian says "That's unfair, how do they get away with it?"

Cue Bo's Crush

[Julieduke]

Elaine: Well I'm sorry Julie.

Jerry: Yeah' date=' you all should come over to that hotel ,I think Boss Hogg wants him to do a stand up?

Elaine: A stand up? Where?

Julie: Oh probably over at the Boars Nest.

Bo: yeah, that's where Boss has his celebrity speed traps.

Brain: Celebrity speed trap?

cue Julieduke[/quote']

Jerry says "So wait a minute instead of paying for entertainment the Sheriff just rips up the ticket. What If I don't want to do and I rather just pay the ticket instead."

Elaine says "Oh Jerry, now your going to be stubborn about this?"

Cue Bo's Crush

[Bo's Crush]

Jerry: Well you have to it isn't fair.

cue Julieduke

[Julieduke]

Jerry: Well you have to it isn't fair.

cue Julieduke

Elaine says "You know the faster you do this little show the faster we can leave Hazzard and besides Brian is bringing back old memories right now. I just realized where I know Julie from her and her two friend went to the same Summer camp in New York and they went around calling themselves the Three Amigas the closest friends in the whole dang camp."

Cue Bo's Crush

[Bo's Crush]

Jerry: Elaine, why didn't you tell us she was in New York we coulda been friends.

Norman: yeah real good friends.

cue Julieduke

[Julieduke]

Jerry: Elaine' date=' why didn't you tell us she was in New York we coulda been friends.

Norman: yeah real good friends.

cue Julieduke[/quote']

Elaine says "Because, she would've done what her cousin Daisy taught to her if you would've gotten too fresh with Julie. And we weren't exactly friends then I kept calling her a hick and a rube and she called me a Damm Yankee, and her two friends as well. We almost got into a fight at the camp the day before we left."

When Julie is just with Brian, Cooter, Bo and Luke and she says "Okay guys Elaine is the girl at summer camp years ago that I wanted to beat up that why we didn't exactly get along and I surprized she didn't remember me. Why one night, I when she was asleep I switch her sunblock in the plastic bottle with insect rebellion nobody wanted to around her all day, but she didn't get not one insect bite and a pretty dark sunburn as well. She wouldn't even talk to me why she couldn't go kissing that boy she met at the cabin the woods the following night. It was perfect, Bo you would've been so proud of me that day."

Brian says "I think I'm not going to cross you but that is pretty funny I bet she smelled horrible she kept putting more on?"

Julie says "Well, I could've snuck a skunk in her cabin and made the all run it there nightshirts that's what Lizzy wanted to do."

Brian says "Now, that'sa pretty funny but one thing how do you tell a unscented one from the scented variety."

Julie says "Only the owner knows the difference now Brian."

Cue Bo's Crush

[Julieduke]

Brian says "Okay, that's pretty mean but what caused you and Elaine not to like each other in the first place Julie?"

Julie says "Well first is me and my two friend and LoriDavenport all talking with her and were at the table and Elaine notice's our accent it's kind of hard not to notice now. Well, she says does anybody know Jethro well I looked at her and told her that was the Beverly Hillbillies and it was tv show. And she tells us that we our just like Ellie Mae on the show."

cue anyboduy

[Bo's Crush]

Jerry: Ya I told her once she looked like Rosie O'Donnel, but she almost killed me that day.

Elaine: Well, I consider that a bad comment, and know I like you Julie, sorry about the past.

cue Julieduke

[Julieduke]

Jerry: Ya I told her once she looked like Rosie O'Donnel' date=' but she almost killed me that day.

Elaine: Well, I consider that a bad comment, and know I like you Julie, sorry about the past.

cue Julieduke[/quote']

Julie says "Sorry Elaine about swithing the sunblock with insect repellant. Boy you sure did get crispy has some fried chicken that day no harm meant."

Elaine says "OMG, that was you that did to me but I got to admit I was teasing you pretty bad and maybe I deserved that little prank you pulled on me. But guess what after that sunburn healed I got more guys attention and my cousins and friends told me I should go out in the sun more often they liked the tan alot on me."

Cue Bo's Crush

[Bo's Crush]

Bo: I forget Julie, When did you go to camp?

cue Julieduke

[Julieduke]

Bo: I forget Julie' date=' When did you go to camp?

cue Julieduke[/quote']

Julie says "The year of the incident that nobody wanted to tell me wanted to tell me about until later."

cue Bo's Crush

[Bo's Crush]

Bo: really? why did you tell us?

cue Julieduke

[Julieduke]

Bo: really? why did you tell us?

cue Julieduke

Julie says "Bo When I got home from camp all of you's looked very upset and I asked you what was bothering anybody and know would say anything. Especially Daisy, she looked upset as well and I noticed that there was a bullet hole in the barn and the other things as well. I might've been a kids then, but I could tell something had happened when I was gone and then twenty-years ago when I was finally told what happened well I understood why you didn't want to tell me anything Bo. Imagine If I had been at home when that happened I would've been really scared with everything going on, I was just a kid then Bo."

cue Bo's Crush