Thoughts behind my last year writing fanfic

[i1976]

I've started last year, 2013, rewriting my old stories, and it was really useful to me.

Thanks of this rewriting, I managed to write the stories I more proud of: "Carry that weight" and "Shattered". I don't know if they are really good stories (I can't judge my stories in an objective way), but I'm really proud of writing them because I think in these stories there's my final "perspective" of Hazzard, a perspective I developed along years.

I'm proud of "Carry that weight" and "Shattered" also 'cause they were written after I decided to free myself by things I felt choking me: I value just one thing, in life, and it's honesty, especially honesty in human relationships, honesty to ourselves and honesty to others. I've realized I can't choke my emotional pattern in order to please others, 'cause it's not honest to myself not to others. I've realized that l can't lie, 'cause lies destroy everything: if someones lies to you, and you found out his lie, you won't be able to trust him anymore, everything else he'll say or everything he's said previously, for you, will be a lie (even if it isn't). If you lose the trust in people, there's nothing else left.

"Carry that weight" and "Shattered", so, are not only my final perspective of Hazzard, but also a collection of MY emotional pattern (I've wondered a lot about trust, idealism, honesty, friendship, family, justice and so on, in these stories).

Now, with "Missed chance" I'm simply having fun, I admit: a collection of dreams, flashbacks and new scenes. For sure it's a story more simple than "Carry that weight" and "Shattered"... unless I'll decide to complicate it

I want to THANK people who have supported me along these years. I write to have fun, but I love the idea some people out there are reading my stories along years and they are enjoying them. I hope I'm going to enjoy you, again and again.

Along my life, I've always heard: "It's just a book"... "It's just a story"... "Focus on real life". But, for me, a book, a story, can be much more thank JUST a book; there's a power in some books that can really change your life and perspective in life, teaching you a LOT of things (I have to thank some books, and writer, because of what they gave to me). I think it's why I usually look for a sense every time I read a book or I watch a movie, the plot tout court doesn't satisfy me.

My dreams: I'd like that some of you will find in my stories a bit more than a Hazzard's fanfic, but a way to reflect himself into the story (saying "hey, it's true. It happened I felt this way, I recognize this feeling and the sense in it"); I'd like that some of you, from time to time, will need to re-read some old stories (or some chapters) just to find a good emotion along some bad days in real life (a sort of life-boat); I'd like some of you will feel the urge to write a story, his story, because he's found the beauty and the power of writing. Maybe my dreams are a bit "high"... but dreaming is free, so I can have "high" dream. If I gave to just ONE of you what I hope, it'll be enough, to me.

THANKS TO YOU ALL

(I wrote this long note also on my profile page, on FF.net, and I'm reposting it here 'cause I want my gratitude will reach you all . Beside, after annoying you with all my announcement, here, I have to show you my gratitude).

(Oh my, I think that, growing old, I'm becoming too much emotional... and wordy... *face palm*)