Jamanda Posted August 28, 2005 Report Share Posted August 28, 2005 For those broadway fans out there! Go Tom Wopat!OH WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MORNINGBo and Luke are driving along in the General.Bo: <sings> There’s a bright golden gleam on the GeneralThere’s a bright golden gleam on the GeneralHe runs fast and high and soars through the skyyyyLuke: <sings>While red and blue gumballs are winking their eyes.Bo: Ding dang it Rosco.Luke: Don’t just sit there! Lose him!Rosco: Oooh, we got ‘em now Flash!Flash: Woof.Rosco: <sings>Oh what a beautiful morning khee kheeOh what a beautiful day gkuh gkuhI’ve got a beautiful feelingThis time they won’t get away!Meanwhile, Cooter is on his way back from a job.Cooter: <sings>And I see the General flyingAnd Rosco’s patrol car is dyingWhen the Dukes have to flee, it means business for me!I might as well follow behind just to see!Bo and Luke make a wide turn and Rosco goes into the pond.Bo and Luke: <sing>Oh what a beautiful morning!Oh what a typical day!Rosco: <sings>I’ve got a bad sinking feeling…Cooter: <sings>The Duke boys have gotten away.Rosco: Cooter! Don’t just stand there! Get me out of here!Cooter: Sure thing Rosco.Cooter tows him out while hearing the Dukes sing again.There’s a bright golden gleam on the General…Rosco: Now they know the General Lee ain’t gold.Cooter: Rosco, how many words do you know that rhyme with orange?Rosco: Oooh, good point.This has been Jamanda's random poetry corner. Tune in next time to see a Duke's version of SURREY WITH A FRINGE ON TOP. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Opossumonagumbush Posted August 29, 2005 Report Share Posted August 29, 2005 You're a genius! I loved it! I love Oklahoma! Maybe that's because I'm from Oklahoma and my family and I go and see it every summer. But anywho... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamanda Posted August 30, 2005 Author Report Share Posted August 30, 2005 Thank you. We were born in Oklahoma, though we live in Kansas now (and we say Kansas is THE most boring state in the Union). Know why it's so windy in Oklahoma? Because Kansas sucks (a joke I heard in college from a friend from Tulsa). Anyhow, here's installment #2.THE SURRY WITH A FRINGE ON TOPLuke: Anyhow, we’re gonna be late.Bo: Keep your shirt on. I know a short cut.Luke: Oh no, not another one of your short cuts.They cut cross country and show up, only a minute late, at Cindy Lou Moffet’s house.Cindy Lou: There you are.Bo: Well, come on Cindy Lou. We gotta drop Luke off in town to meet up with his girl.Luke: Climb on in.They take off.Bo: <sings>Don’t you love just ridin’ in the General?Riding along with me in the General?You and me and Luke in the GeneralWith the flaaaag on top.Now all we do is find Luke a ladyDrop him off and go where it’s shadyYou and me in a nice place that shadyWhere the time just stopsIn the bright orange GeneralWith a flag on the top! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamanda Posted August 31, 2005 Author Report Share Posted August 31, 2005 PEOPLE WILL SAY WE’RE IN LOVEMeanwhile, Enos has been told to stake out the farm in case Bo and Luke come back. As he does, Daisy comes out to do laundry. Enos tries to be discreet, but Daisy sees him anyway.Daisy: <sings>Don’t stand and spy on meDon’t chase my car too muchDon’t stand and smile at mePeople will say we’re in loveDon’t say you’re just doing your jobDon’t say you can’t tell me whyDon’t grin with that gleam in your eyePeople will say we’re in loveDon’t start being sweet to meRosco’s upset with you enoughDon’t say it has to be this wayPeople will say we’re in loveEnos: <sings>Don’t try distracting meDon’t run me in the creekDon’t kiss me on the cheekPeople will say we’re in loveDon’t wear those shorts and heelsDon’t wear your shirt to lowYou know what that does to mePeople will say we’re in loveDon’t flash those eyes at meRosco’s upset with me enoughDon’t say it has to be this wayPeople will say we’re in love. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamanda Posted September 2, 2005 Author Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 OL’ JUDD IS DEADBack in town, Boss is meeting with his lawmen, grieving about how little he’s made in the past month.Boss: Oh my dear. Sometimes I think this town would be better off without me.Rosco: Oh now Boss, you know that ain’t true. I mean…financially…yes…Boss: I knew it!Rosco: But everyone in town loves you too! Imagine how sad they’d be if you were gone. Ain’t that right Enos?Enos: Yes sir, we’d all miss you Mr. Hogg.Boss: They would?Rosco: You know what they’d say?Boss: What?Rosco and Enos: <sing>Old Boss is deadA stone marks his headAnd Lulu’s come to town dressed in black(Enos: dressed in black)He’s gone to his rewardAnd the sheriff’s awful soreHe won’t get his little fat buddy backDear Boss is deadWe’ve got Hughie Hogg insteadTo steal and extort our money blindThe Beaudry’s run his stillDewey Hogg took out his filllCompared to them, our dear Boss was kind.Pooor BossPoooo-oooor BoooooosssssEVERYTHING’S UP TO DATE IN KANSAS CITYRosco: Besides Boss, I gotta report some things to ya.Boss: Oh you do?Rosco: Uh…Enos…Don’t you need to go on patrol?Enos: Oh, right Sheriff.Rosco: Now, Boss. I don’t think you have to worry about a thing.Boss: I don’t?Rosco: No…cuz <sings>Everything’s running smooth in Hazzard CountyWe’ve gone about as far as we can goBoth your stills are running shine each hour of the dayWe got a spare just in case one blows.Boss: Rosco!Rosco: <sings>Everythings running smooth in Hazzard CountyWe got some trumped up charges for them DukesWe’re gonna catch em someday and throw ‘em in the jailThen when Jesse Duke shows up to offer us his bailHe’ll have to auction off the farm and move to BloomingdaleBoss: <sings>He’s gone about as far as he can go.Rosco: Yes sir! He’s gone about as far as he can go. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamanda Posted September 2, 2005 Author Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 (of course we like the Kansas City song This next one is for fans of the episode "Luke's Love Story")ALL OR NOTHINGLuke is back at the Boar’s Nest meeting with his old girlfriend, Amy Creevy.Luke: I really wish you’d stick around.Amy: But you understand why I don’t.Luke: I know…I’m just afraid I’ll fail you…again.Amy: Luke Duke, you’re just gonna have to realize something.Luke: What?Amy: <sings>With me, it’s all or nothingIs it all or nothing with you?It can’t be in-betweenIt can’t be now and thenNo half-and-half with me will doLuke: <sings>So with you, it’s all or nothingDespite the fact that I’m a DukeIf I don’t want you to goI cannot act like BoAmy: <sings>If I can do it now, then so can youLuke: <sings>And supposing I am successful?Amy: <sings>I’ll stick around and be with you.Luke and Amy seem to reach an agreement for the time being and share a drink in the back of the bar. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamanda Posted September 2, 2005 Author Report Share Posted September 2, 2005 (And now for the grand finale!)THE FARMER AND THE COWBOYS SHOULD BE FRIENDSBoss and the police officers arrive at the Boar’s Nest. Uncle Jesse arrives with Cooter behind them.Boss: All right Rosco! Arrest Luke Duke!Luke: For what?Rosco: Never mind that now.Enos: Sheriff? I thought we was arresting him for blowing up that still.Luke: I didn’t blow up a still! I’ve been with Amy all afternoon.Amy: Yes he has.Rosco: Than it must’ve been Bo.Bo: <coming in> Must’ve been me doing what?Cindy Lou: <coming in> Bo ain’t done nothin’. We’ve been down at Jenson’s Hollow all day.Rosco: Oh, bad news, bad news.Enos: They all have alibis Sheriff.Rosco: I know that you dipstick.Boss: All right, all right then. Who did blow up my still?Jesse: You mean the one over by Clear creek?Boss: Yeah, that’s the one.Jesse: Well, I think you found your answer. Didn’t you know they redrew the county line yesterday?Boss: What? Oh no! My still! It’s in…Cooter: Was in Chickasaw. Bet you anything ol’ Sheriff Little found it and…Bo: Kabloooie!Boss: Oh no hoooooo. That dang blasted lawman!Jesse: J.D. You remember how that old song went?Boss: Which one?Jesse: You know <sings>Oh the runners and the lawmen should be friendsOh the runners and the lawmen should be friendsOne is running making shineBoss: <sings>The other shoots them from behind.Jesse: <sings>But that’s no reason why they can’t be friends.Luke: I like that. But I think we should update it.Bo: I agree.Bo and Luke: <sing>Oh the Duke boys and the lawmen should be friendsOh the Duke boys and the lawmen should be friendsOne of ‘em drives the General LeeThe other works for ol’ JDBut that’s no reason why they can’t be friendsEnos and Cooter: <sing>Hazzard folk should stick togetherHazzard folk should all be palsLawmen dance with the Duke boy’s daughterDuke boys dance with the lawman’s gal!Rosco: But you two ain’t got no daughters.Jesse: No, but my brother was a Duke boy. And his daughter is dancing with your deputy.Rosco: Enos!Jesse: <sings>I’d like to say a word for the Duke boysIf they need help to get out of hot waterDon’t treat them like a louse, make them welcome in your houseMr. Moffet <pulling away Cindy Lou and sings>:But first make sure you hide your wife and daughter!Everyone: <sings>Hazzard folk should stick togetherHazzard folk should all be palsLawmen dance with the Duke boy’s daughterDuke boy’s dance with the lawman’s gal!Boss: Bo Duke! I don’t care if Mr. Moffet did take your date! No one dances with Lulu but me!Bo: Sorry Boss! Can’t hear ya!Lulu: Ooooh, this is fun!Enos: <sings>I’d like to say a word for the lawmanPeople just don’t treat us like they shouldI’m not saying that we're better than anybody elseRosco: <sings>But we’ll be danged if we ain’t just as good!Enos: Sheriff!Rosco: Well we are!Everyone: <sings>Hazzard folk should stick togetherHazzard folk should all be palsLawmen dance with the Duke boy’s daughterDuke boy’s dance with the lawman’s gal!OKALAHOMA!Everyone gathers together for one last song.Haaaaaaaazzard CountyWhere the General Lee flies across the sky!And the Sheriff’s carDon’t go that farWith Cooter’s tow truck standing by!Haaaaaaazzard CountyEverynight we sit and watch the showAs the sheriff and BossAre at a lossAs where the Duke boys seem to go.We know we belong to the BossBut the Duke boys are causing his lossAs we say yeeeee-ha!A rip and roaring yeeeeee-ha!We’re saying you’re looking fine Hazzard County!Hazzard County.Yeee Haa!We know we belong to the BossBut the Duke boys are causing his lossAs we say yeeeee-ha!A rip and roaring yeeeeee-ha!We’re saying you’re looking fine Hazzard County!Hazzard County.H A Z Z A R and DHazzard Couuuuuuun-ty!This has been Jamanda's musical poetry corner. We now return to regular Hazzardnet programming. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Opossumonagumbush Posted September 3, 2005 Report Share Posted September 3, 2005 Fantastic! Magnificent! Wonderful! These are just a few descriptive words to discribe this! It was much more fun than the Hugh Jackman version of Oklahoma. Which, if you haven't seen it, you should never watch it, because it's just a waste of three hours of your life. You're right, Kansas is the most boring state in the Union. I have cousins that moved up there. So Kansas is the most boring state in the Union, but during the Civil War, Oklahoma was the most boring state in the Confederacy, it evens out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JESSI DUKE Posted September 4, 2005 Report Share Posted September 4, 2005 That was pretty good. I hope you do more like that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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