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Picking Up the Pieces


runningwild

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"I know, but I still respect you enough to be grateful that you did it at all." Luke got out of the car, but before he closed the door he replied, "Okay, just try not to leave me stranded out here."

Closing the door, he looked around and remembered the old still site. It seemed like forever since he'd been out there. Still the site was memorable and he was just glad to see something familiar that didn't hate him.

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Uncle Jesse found some kind of busy joy in his heart to whistle a tune softly to himself while in the barn. It helped to pass the time while he gathered the eggs and made sure that everything was tended to that needed it. Since Luke and Bo wasn't around to have extra sets of hands, he found himself doing a good amount of the outside work, while Daisy tended to the house. Jesse was a humble man and even if he was down on his luck he still did it with a smile. He was old, but not out so he could get by if need be. The money that Bo sent was a big help, but it just didn't make up for the long hours he pulled everyday. Right now, Daisy was at the Boar's Nest putting in a few extra hours. They could use the extra money.

Luke pushed around some of the dirt around him with the toe of his boot, then he decided to take a look around. The site looked like he always remembered it, but still it was a new world to him. Jail can do that to a man so can women. He may have been infatuated with Cassie, but it seemed to go that much more deeper than that. So deep that he would hold her above anyone else because in his heart her love for him was just as good as family. There was no making Bo understand that though because he was a stubborn fool. But, Luke knew that there were times when he should've considered Bo, Uncle Jesse, and Daisy over Cassie. He wanted to save her, but that crossed his name out of Bo's book. Luke could only wish that Bo could have been in his shoes so that he could make the decision to save the love of his life, if he had the chance.

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Bo soon sped into the Duke farmyard, slamming on the brakes and bringing the car to a screeching halt. He couldn't remember a time that he had been pleased to get away from his cousin...except when the Carnival had rolled into town of course.

Shaking his head, Bo went to the barn where he heard Jesse whistling.

"Uncle Jesse..."

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Jesse Duke looked up from gathering the eggs, "Bo! It's good to see ya." He looked rather jolly, but paused because Bo didn't look equally as cheerful.

"Is everything all right?" The old man held onto his basket and didn't reach for anymore eggs. What matter to him was the well being of his nephew and that was the only thing on his mind.

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Bo nodded, leaning against one of the support posts in the barn

"Yeah i'm fine...I busted Luke out of jail...he's at SS4."

The youngest said casually with no hint of the old excitement or interest that he used to have when he and Luke used to bust out of Jail together. He actually looked thoroughly disinterested and like he wanted nothing more than to get out of Hazzard again and continue doing his job.

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Jesse just looked at Bo it was as if he was studying the young boys face. There was no sign of excited, but it was washed out in apathy. The old man couldn't understand it; yet, at the the same time he understood everything fully.

"You plannin' on leavin' him up there?" Uncle Jesse asked out of curiosity, "because that tone you're carryin' doesn't seem that you came much." He shook his head slowly, "Bo, I don't blame ya for how you feel, you can't help that. I just wish you boys could work something out. I knew you wouldn't stay on the farm forever, but its hard gettin' use to not having you boys around much less knowin' that you're fussin'."

The whole situation sadden Jesse Duke because he watched the boys fall apart between each other and then each one separately. "I'm not asking you to understand Luke's side of the story, and I ain't askin' ya to forgive him neither. But, I think both of ya need to find some common ground to stand on whether its the back 40 or whatever'n ya choose."

Falling quiet for a moment, the old man spoke again. "What do ya want from him Bo? Specifically, what'do ya want? I know Luke don't know how to make things right with ya. He told me that a million times in jail and the only advice I could offer him was that in good time you would come to forgive him. But, that's only when your ready too, which by the looks on your face, Bo, seems to be in another lifetime."

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Bo sighed and leaned his head back as he listened to his Uncle, exhaling softly as he finished and snapping his head back upright.

"What do I want?! I want Luke to understand how the heck I feel! He's dating the woman who helped get me shot and now he was sitting in jail willing to let the guy who shot me in the first place walk free so that he could get Cassie out of jail!"

Bo shook his head, pushing off the support post and crossing the barn as he kicked a bucket.

"The reason Luke doesn't know how to make things right is because he's so infatuated with that hussy that he can't see what she's doing! She's got him completly wrapped and trapped under her thumb! As soon as she snaps her fingers, he's there on his knees like a dog ust begging for her attention! If me an' her were shot in the same street, he'd go t'her and that is why I ain't ready t'forgive him till he can see all this. And before you ask, I can't tell him! He won't listen at all. He'd just try and convince me what a great person Cassie is..."

Everytime Bo said Cassie's name, he near spat the word out his mouth, putting a mocking tone on at the last 6 words.

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Uncle Jesse just stared at Bo almost in disbelief. The gears in the old man's mind were turning and he wanted to try to say just the right thing to his nephew. However, he was finding it hard to make an argument right off hand because his heart ached for Bo and it ached for Luke.

"Bo, just listen to me," he started off softly. "Now, I know things over the past year have been crazy around here. I know Cassie made a mistake, but I know her side of the story and I see her point. I will say that I thank the good Lord every day that didn't want to risk you boys in her problems with that Conrad fella. I respect that and that makes her a decent person." He paused knowing that Bo wouldn't like his comment, "However, I also see your side to things Bo. She was you friend since you'ns was little and she in a way betrayed you. That's something that you can't forgive overnight. Cassie let that fella out of jail and she took Luke from you. She got herself into a whole mess of trouble, and I do hope that she can straighten things out for herself. If I didn't know any better, I would've sworn as a child that she was your sister. You and her were both pistols."

Jesse sighed taking a few steps and grabbing Bo softly by the shoulder. His big dirty hand clasped Bo's shoulder and he looked him right in the eye.

"Luke loves her and because he loves her he refuses to see anything but the good in her. Right now, he has to try hard to see that good, when you are oblivious to it, Son. I know you're hurting over what's going on between you and Luke. But, you've got to show him that you sympathize with what he thinks just a tad or you're going to push him away forever. Luke told me a hundred times, while he was in jail, that he wished that he'd been the one shot not you. That he wished he could make things right with you, but that he knew that he couldn't because you had left and he was going to be sitting in that jail cell for a long, long time. I can only imagine what went through his mind when he saw you today. I know it must've cheered him up, Bo. You two are practically brothers and what is a man without his brother?"

Letting his hand fall off of Bo's shoulder, he added his last thoughts.

"Luke's love for Cassie isn't going to just go away overnight. He's going to ache for her for years. Don't preach to him about Cassie. He doesn't want to hear it. You said so yourself and everybody knows that. If she's gone, then his healing will start. Don't be angry with him Bo. Because if I know Luke, he would take the bullet for both of you in the street so that he would never have to see the two people he cares about the most hurt."

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Bo shook his head as Jesse stopped talking, looking down at the floor as he tried to calm himself down enough to speak. There was just too many emotions going through Bo at the moment, many of which he had bottled up on the race track so that he didn't have to deal with them. Betrayal, Anger, Hurt, Grief, Sadness, Guilt...it was like an emotional storm raging out of control and in truth Bo was not only frightened of the situation that was escalating beyond any sort of control he had, but he was frightened of himself and the kind of person he was becoming.

"I can't sympathize with him...maybe I could have done before today...but after hearing what I heard in that jail cell I can't."

Bo finally looked back up at his Uncle, tears shining in his eyes once more as Grief took over.

"When Luke came back from Nam...he made a promise to me....when we became blood brothers he swore that he would never let anything tear us apart again...that nothing would ever stand in his way of us being brothers for life....what part of saying he'll willingly let a guy who tried to murder me walk free for some girl he's infatuated with beyond reason is keeping that promise?"

Bo swallowed hard, forcing back a sob that wanted to escape so badly he was trembling from the effort not to dissolve into them.

"I know I's been in a similar situation with Diane...but Diane didn't do anything wrong...nothin'. It was all Carl tryin' to kill me...she did love me...the only thing she did was break my heart an' as soon as I realised that I apologized to Luke and worked to get his trust back....its been a year...and Luke ain't even tried."

Looking away, Bo sighed as he regained his composure a little and muttered.

"I'll be civil to him...that's the best I can do...he's got a lot to make up for before I even think about letting him call me cousin again...let alone brother...the only reason I ain't makin' him call me Beauregard an' not Bo is cause I hate the name..."

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"Bo, that's the best thing you can do. I'm going to try to help you through this because I know you understand even when you don't want to. I'll tell you like I told Luke before it's his life and if he feels like there's a place for Cassie in it, then so be it."

Jesse paused and stared at Bo stricken with grief. The sight of him tore Jesse's nerves up and he knew that he had to be strong for Bo. There was nothing that he could to to immediately take the pain away, but he would if he could.

"I'd like to think that Luke could be happy with Cassie and that's because I want Luke to be happy. But, I know you're hurt Bo and Luke did promise the blood brother pact with you. This is just one bump in a dirt road, Son. Be civil to Luke, like you said, and I know things will patch themselves up."

He paused, "Now, do you wanna go back to site? You can't just leave'm out there no matter how mad you are at him. If a part of you didn't want to forgive him, you wouldn't have gotten him out of jail."

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Bo shook his head with a slight humourless laugh.

"The only reason I opened the jail cell was so I could give him a smack round the face which actually felt really good after so long."

He admitted to his Uncle without looking at him, looking at his knuckles that were still quite sore instead as he carried on speaking.

"I'll be civil an' i'll go back up there, but you need to come too with Daisy 'cause he's got some sort of a plan he wants to put into action apparently. An' also, if he mentions Cassie an' how much he loves her even once, i'm not stickin; around otherwise i'll just loose my temper."

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Jesse gave his nephew a stern look, "Well don't beat him to death, before you get things straightened out."

He shook his head only because this was exactly what he expected from the boys. It didn't appear that Luke had hit him back so that was a good sign.

"I'll get Daisy and bring her up there. She'll be home soon. Go on and see what Luke's plan is, but don't lose your temper. To be fair, let him ask you about Cassie if he wants. He hasn't been able to hear much about her and I ain't had the heart to tell him, when he asks."

Cassie had pulled through her surgery, but had sustained a long recovery. The entire process had been a medical rehab for her. It had been painful and an experience she never wanted to go through again. Finally, Cassie Morgan was sober and miraculously out of jail. However, she had only managed to get out because of Sawyer. He had done just what he said and so smoothly that no one knew that the real criminal had set the girl free. Whatever evidence he submitted was enough to clear Cassie on her charges. There was no reason for Luke to know she was out.

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Bo sighed and nodded, pushing away from the support post as he mumbled a 'Yes Sir' back and headed back to his sports car, noting to himself that he needed to wash it as he got in and headed back up to the still site.

No matter how hard he tried to forget, Cassie's name kept popping up like an annoying farm animal that used to follow him around as a kid. No matter what you did, it wouldn't leave and that only made his anger against her worse. As strong and sure as Luke was that Cassie was a good person, Bo's determination that she wasn't such an angel as Luke kept making out was just as strong and was growing by the minute. The Cassie he had grown up with and dated at one point had been lost a long way down the line, and he didn't see any chance of that girl coming back any more than he saw him and Luke ever being the same way they were before again either.

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Jesse just shook his head and sighed. As he picked up the basket of eggs, he could hear Bo pulling out of the yard. He hoped that the boys could straighten things out among themselves because something this big could ruin them for life.

Luke had looked around the site a little while, before finding him a place to sit. Luckily for him, there was a set up like a chair that he could use as his seat. To him it seemed like Bo was gone forever, but the thought never crossed his mind that his cousin wouldn't come back. That's because he had that kind of faith in Bo, but he didn't know if he could set things straight with him. He figured that once Bo got back he'd try to talk to him.

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To Bo's dismay, it wasn't long before he was back at the still site, no matter how many detours he tried to take in order to make the trip longer. He would have been longer if he had been in the General because he could have made some jumps, but as it was, sliding into the General actually made him feel sick with the amount of memories that kept tumbling back to him when he did.

He sighed as he pulled up and got out the car, slamming the door before hoisting himself up to lie on the roof in the sun, unsnapping his shirt and slipping it off his shoulders so he was tanning himself but lying on his shirt so he wouldn't burn his back on the heat of the metal.

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Luke looked up when Bo arrive. Just watching him try to get a sun tan made Luke laugh to himself. What was his cousin doing? Standing up he headed over to Bo's car.

"Alright Pretty Boy, where's Uncle Jesse and Daisy?"

The entire time that he'd seen Bo he tried to be light hearted even if it was uncalled for. Somehow he just wanted everything to be back to normal with him and Bo.

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Luke shook his head, "Sounds fine." He paused and looked at Bo for a moment, "So, you plan on soaking up the sun until they get here? Because as fascinating as it is to watch you sunbathe, I figured I'd tried to talk to you."

The sun was shining brightly and the glare off the hood of the car caught Luke in the eye. Stepping to the side, he stuck his hands in his pockets. "I've got a few things to say to ya, Cousin." Luke didn't care if Bo wanted him to call him Cousin or not.

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Luke just nodded, "Fair enough because this conversation is about me and you not her." He wanted to say her name, but figured that Bo wouldn't take too kindly to that.

"Look Bo, I know things haven't been the best between us and all. I know that I've got myself into a whole mess of trouble and broke a promise I made to you. Now, in my defense I tried to do things that I thought were right and in doing so I didn't make the best decisions. That deal I made with Sawyer was out of desperation. Yeah Bo, I sunk that low because I had already figured that I'd be sittin' behind bars for a long time. But, you have to understand.. I barely recognized him and I knew that the police weren't going to arrest him again. He would've walked free anyway."

The older Duke cousin took his hands out of his pockets and crossed them casually over his chest.

"I'd took that bullet for you Bo if I could. You're my brother and that's whether or not you'd admit it now or not. I'm sorry for everything. I can't take none of it back, but if I had it all to do over again I'd change it. I would've taken the bullet for you. I would've never let things get as far as they did. I wanted to save her. I know I ain't suppose to mention her, but that's all I can say about it. And, in my attempt at rescuin' her everything went to hell and not only did I lose her.. I lost my brother. That, Bo, is what hurt more than anything. You can hate me all you want because that's only fair. Hell, you don't even have to accept my apology. You can get up right now and leave, but I'll tell you without your help I'll never be able to set things straight and put that Sawyer fella behind bars."

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Bo didn't speak while Luke spoke, he didn't even move. He did listen though, listened to every word Luke said because the little kid in him that desperatly wanted to just revert back to the childhood days when everything was happy and nothing serious ever really happened.

When Luke had finished his speech, Bo still didn't look up or move. He just lay there thinking about what Luke said. It didn't make him love Luke any better than before he had made the speech, didn't make him not want to turn around and storm off again either. Luke was calling him his brother again, when Bo still doubted that Luke truly actually meant the words. Shaking his head, Bo finally sat up and looked Luke in the eye from the roof of the car.

"No Luke...you didn't just break a promise to me...you killed me...and everything I ever believed in..."

Bo slid down the side of the car, seeing the confused expression on Luke's face.

"Of course you don't understand...when you were a kid you always looked up to Uncle Jesse as a hero, or the comic book characters and dont give me none of this you were my hero either cause I KNOW that ain't true. But...for me...the only one I was ever interested in was you...all I ever wanted to be when I grew up was exactly like my older cousin...because he was my hero...he was the one taught me right from wrong, taught me everything...and he was real...someone I could count on, believe in...I never thought i'd see the day I would be thankful I am nothing like you....but recently I have done."

Bo shook his head, putting his hands on his hips and turning away.

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Luke was almost speechless, after hearing what Bo had to say to him. Every word he said hurt Luke a little more and he was truly disappointed in himself. But, at the same time he wanted to make Bo understand even when it wasn't his place to.

"Bo, I'm sorry. I know.. I should've known.. I should've thought. I'm glad you turned out to be nothing like me. You wouldn't want to be the man that killed dreams. Why would'you want to be like me anyhow? You've got everything going for you with racing and all. You ain't got no problem gettin' the girls. I've known a time or two that you took my girl from me, which is a whole nother conversation."

In no way shape or form did Luke try to coax Bo to turn around and face him. There was no reason to because the younger Duke had to make that decision for himself.

"I'm only human.. just like you. We bleed the same blood, Bo. I made mistakes. Big mistakes that just so happened to come one right after another. I'm man enough to own up to those mistakes and I'm sorry that I made them. Most of all, I'm sorry that I killed you. What kind of man would do that to his own brother? It had to happen some day, but not like this never like this. Maybe when I got married that bond would break a little, but everything that happened just seems too crazy. Too much like some movie you'd go to Atlanta to see."

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